哪里才是给你幸福的地方
文章来源:未知 文章作者:enread 发布时间:2013-06-24 03:31 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
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Once, when a relationship I loved but struggled with was ending, I felt convinced that if only he and I went to the spot of one of our first dates (a place we had returned to throughout our relationship and where we always felt calm and connected), we would somehow figure everything out. Of course, I didn't suggest we go there, and so we didn't, and the relationship came to its natural end. Looking back I don't think the place could have breathed new life into anything at the time, anyway, but what's striking to me is that, for a moment, I was certain that a place had the power to do so. Such is the power of a couple's secret, private space.
 
When we're growing up, forts made of blankets and secret clubhouses provide space for friendships and crushes to develop. And if you've seen the movie Up!, you perhaps have some thoughts on how one's childhood clubhouse(俱乐部) can - with a little care, fresh paint, and the right partner-in-crime - create space for adult love to bloom.
 
As women and men grow up and form loving adult relationships, it becomes increasingly important for couples to create a space in which they can relax, be themselves, and grow closer. For many couples, the bed they share may be the place to which they retreat for feelings of safety, comfort and love - not to mention sex. A couple's bed is where they may let down their emotional and physical guards during sleep as well as during sex. In fact, it may be one of the few places where they can make themselves feel entirely1 vulnerable to another human being.
 
For some people, trust and security come easy. For others, learning to be vulnerable to another person is a struggle that they may or may not win with time, practice and what feels like great risk taking. Consequently, as damaging as affairs in any shape or form may be, they can feel particularly threatening when a person allows their affair into the bed they share with their partner. Betraying trust by letting someone else into a couple's bed can feel not just hurtful, but devastating2.
 
The bed is such a special place for many women and men that it's not unusual for some couples to say that they have their best conversations with each other when they are in bed. Maybe they wake up on weekends feeling rested and enjoy lying together, just talking. Perhaps before sleep, the ritual of getting undressed, settling into bed and holding one another close allows the conversation to flow more naturally than during the day. For some couples, it's sex that brings them closer - kissing, hugging, touching3, and naked passion may be followed by cuddling, closeness and sharing secrets one might never think to share over breakfast, let's say, or watching television.
 
As relationship-enhancing as a bed or bedroom may be, others places can allow love or sex to bloom, too. A bath tub can serve as a private sanctuary4 in which some couples dissect5 their day, share their dreams, or seduce6 one another. The shower can be not only a place to become clean but a place to start kissing or to have passionate7, lustful8 sex. Some couples find their special place outside the home: a fire tower nestled in the woods in which they can take in an entire forest of autumn leaves, a park in which they can lie down and look at clouds, or a neighborhood hotel that they can retreat to for a night away from the kids and a chance to feel young again. Even a living room sofa can provide comfort and closeness for a couple or family as they huddle9 together(挤在一起) to eat popcorn10 and watch a movie.
 
Wherever you find your special place, know that it is important to have one and to visit it with some regularity11 to keep it alive as a sanctuary(避难所) and a place that matters. Spaces become alive in the ways that they bring us closer to a partner, a family or a group of friends. As life gets hectic12 and relationships become stressed, special places can help to center a relationship. Going to bed together can feel calming, sneaking13 away to your favorite hotel can ignite passion, and drawing a fragranced14 bath for your significant other may just inspire romance or re-connection. Where's your secret spot?


点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 entirely entirely     
ad.全部地,完整地;完全地,彻底地
参考例句:
  • The fire was entirely caused by their neglect of duty. 那场火灾完全是由于他们失职而引起的。
  • His life was entirely given up to the educational work. 他的一生统统献给了教育工作。
2 devastating muOzlG     
adj.毁灭性的,令人震惊的,强有力的
参考例句:
  • It is the most devastating storm in 20 years.这是20年来破坏性最大的风暴。
  • Affairs do have a devastating effect on marriages.婚外情确实会对婚姻造成毁灭性的影响。
3 touching sg6zQ9     
adj.动人的,使人感伤的
参考例句:
  • It was a touching sight.这是一幅动人的景象。
  • His letter was touching.他的信很感人。
4 sanctuary iCrzE     
n.圣所,圣堂,寺庙;禁猎区,保护区
参考例句:
  • There was a sanctuary of political refugees behind the hospital.医院后面有一个政治难民的避难所。
  • Most countries refuse to give sanctuary to people who hijack aeroplanes.大多数国家拒绝对劫机者提供庇护。
5 dissect 3tNxQ     
v.分割;解剖
参考例句:
  • In biology class we had to dissect a frog.上生物课时我们得解剖青蛙。
  • Not everyone can dissect and digest the public information they receive.不是每个人都可以解析和消化他们得到的公共信息的。
6 seduce ST0zh     
vt.勾引,诱奸,诱惑,引诱
参考例句:
  • She has set out to seduce Stephen.她已经开始勾引斯蒂芬了。
  • Clever advertising would seduce more people into smoking.巧妙策划的广告会引诱更多的人吸烟。
7 passionate rLDxd     
adj.热情的,热烈的,激昂的,易动情的,易怒的,性情暴躁的
参考例句:
  • He is said to be the most passionate man.据说他是最有激情的人。
  • He is very passionate about the project.他对那个项目非常热心。
8 lustful woszqJ     
a.贪婪的;渴望的
参考例句:
  • Adelmo agreed and duly submitted to Berengar's lustful advances. 阿德尔摩同意了并适时地顺从了贝仁格情欲的增长。
  • The lustful scenes of the movie were abhorrent to the old lady. 电影里淫荡的画面让这老妇人厌恶。
9 huddle s5UyT     
vi.挤作一团;蜷缩;vt.聚集;n.挤在一起的人
参考例句:
  • They like living in a huddle.他们喜欢杂居在一起。
  • The cold wind made the boy huddle inside his coat.寒风使这个男孩卷缩在他的外衣里。
10 popcorn 8lUzJI     
n.爆米花
参考例句:
  • I like to eat popcorn when I am watching TV play at home.当我在家观看电视剧时,喜欢吃爆米花。
  • He still stood behind his cash register stuffing his mouth with popcorn.他仍站在收银机后,嘴里塞满了爆米花。
11 regularity sVCxx     
n.规律性,规则性;匀称,整齐
参考例句:
  • The idea is to maintain the regularity of the heartbeat.问题就是要维持心跳的规律性。
  • He exercised with a regularity that amazed us.他锻炼的规律程度令我们非常惊讶。
12 hectic jdZzk     
adj.肺病的;消耗热的;发热的;闹哄哄的
参考例句:
  • I spent a very hectic Sunday.我度过了一个忙乱的星期天。
  • The two days we spent there were enjoyable but hectic.我们在那里度过的两天愉快但闹哄哄的。
13 sneaking iibzMu     
a.秘密的,不公开的
参考例句:
  • She had always had a sneaking affection for him. 以前她一直暗暗倾心于他。
  • She ducked the interviewers by sneaking out the back door. 她从后门偷偷溜走,躲开采访者。
14 fragranced cea3acc4a83e3466cf7c31b2b2f88be6     
n.芳香,香味( fragrance的名词复数 );香水
参考例句:
  • The bath oil comes in various fragrances. 这种沐浴油有不同的香味。
  • This toilet soap lathers so nicely and has several fragrances. 这种香皂起泡很多,并且有好几种香味。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
TAG标签: secret place couples
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