Everyone in the apartment complex I lived in knew who Ugly was. Ugly was the resident tomcat(公猫). Ugly loved three things in this world: fighting, eating garbage, and, shall we say, love.
The combination of these things combined with a life spent outside had their effect on Ugly. To start with, he had only one eye and where the other should have been was a
gaping1 hole. He was also missing his ear on the same side, his left foot appeared to have been badly broken at one time, and had healed at an
unnatural2 angle, making him look like he was always turning the corner. His tail has long ago been lost, leaving only the smallest
stub(烟蒂,树桩), which he would constantly
jerk(肌肉抽搐) and
twitch3.
Ugly would have been a dark grey tabby(平纹,斑猫), striped-type, except for the sores covering his head, neck, even his shoulders with thick, yellowing scabs. Every time someone saw Ugly there was the same reaction. "That's one UGLY cat!!"
All the children were warned not to touch him, the adults threw rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted him when he tried to come in their home or shut his paws in the door when he would not leave. Ugly always had the same reaction. If you turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting soaked until you gave up and quit. If you threw things at him, he would curl his
lanky4(瘦长的) body around feet in forgiveness.
Whenever he spied children, he would come running, meowing
frantically5 and bump his head against their hand begging for their love. If you ever picked him, up he would immediately begin suckling on your shirt,
earring6 whatever he could find.
One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbor's huskies. They did not respond
kindly7, and Ugly was badly mauled. From my apartment I could hear his scream and I tried to rush to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was apparent Ugly's sad life was almost at an end.
Ugly lay in a wet circle, his back legs and lower back twisted grossly out of shape, a gaping tear in the white strip of fur that ran down his front. As I picked him up and tried to carry him home, I could hear him
wheezing8 and
gasping9, and could feel him struggling. It must be hurting him terribly, I thought.
Then I felt a familiar
tugging10, sucking sensation on my ear. Ugly, in so much pain, suffering and obviously dying, was trying to suckle my ear. I pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of my hand with his head, then he turned his one golden eye towards me, and I could hear the distinct sound of purring. Even in the greatest pain, that ugly battled-scarred cat was asking only for a little affection, perhaps some
compassion11.
At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me to relieve his pain.
Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and held him for a long time
afterward12 thinking about how one scarred,
deformed13 little stray could so alter my opinion about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion than a thousand book lecture or talk show specials ever could, and for that I will always be thankful. He had been scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love truly and deeply. To give my total to those I cared for.
Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked, beautiful, but for me, I will always try to be Ugly.