Pilot

The chief of staff of the US Air Force decided¹ that he would personally intervene in the recruiting crisis affecting all of our armed services.

He directed that a Air Force base nearby to a Redneck town be opened and that all eligible² young men and women be invited to come and see it.

As he and his staff were standing³ near a brand new F-15 Fighter, a pair of twin brothers who looked like they had just stepped off a Marine⁴ Corps⁵ recruiting poster walked up to them.

The chief of staff walked up to them, stuck out his hand and introduced himself.

He looked at the first young man and asked, "Son, what skills can you bring to the Air Force?"

The young man looks at him and says, "I'm a pilot!"

The general gets all excited, turns to his aide and says, "Get him in today, all the paper work done, everything, do it!"

The aide hustles⁶ the young man off. The general looks at the second young man and asked, "What skills to you bring to the Air Force?"

The young man says, "I chop wood!"

"Son," the general replies, "we don't need wood choppers in the Air Force, what do you know how to do?"

"I chop wood!"

"Young man," huffs the general, "you are not listening to me, we don't need wood choppers, this is the 20th century!"

"Well," the young man says, "you hired my brother!"

"Of course we did," says the general, "he's a pilot!"

The young man rolls his eyes and says, "Dang it, I have to chop it before he can pile it!"