It is the custom on the stage, in all good murderous
melodramas1, to present the
tragic2 and the comic scenes, in as regular alternation, as the layers of red and white in a side of streaky bacon.
The hero sinks upon his straw bed, weighed down by
fetters4 and misfortunes; in the next scene, his faithful but unconscious
squire5 regales the audience with a comic song.
We
behold6, with
throbbing7 bosoms8, the heroine in the grasp of a proud and ruthless
baron9: her
virtue10 and her life alike in danger, drawing
forth11 her
dagger12 to preserve the one at the cost of the other; and just as our expectations are
wrought13 up to the highest pitch, a whistle is heard, and we are straightway transported to the great hall of the castle; where a grey-headed seneschal sings a funny chorus with a funnier body of
vassals14, who are free of all sorts of places, from church
vaults15 to palaces, and roam about in company, carolling perpetually. Such changes appear absurd; but they are not so
unnatural16 as they would seem at first sight.
The transitions in real life from well-spread boards to death-beds, and from mourning-weeds to holiday garments, are not a
whit3 less startling; only, there, we are busy actors, instead of passive lookers-on, which makes a vast difference.
The actors in the
mimic17 life of the theatre, are blind to violent transitions and
abrupt18 impulses of passion or feeling, which, presented before the eyes of
mere19 spectators, are at once
condemned20 as
outrageous21 and
preposterous22. As sudden shiftings of the scene, and rapid changes of time and place, are not only sanctioned in books by long usage, but are by many considered as the great art of authorship: an author's skill in his craft being, by such critics, chiefly estimated with relation to the
dilemmas23 in which he leaves his characters at the end of every chapter: this brief introduction to the present one may perhaps be deemed unnecessary.
If so, let it be considered a delicate intimation on the part of the historian that he is going back to the town in which Oliver Twist was born; the reader taking it for granted that there are good and substantial reasons for making the journey, or he would not be invited to proceed upon such an expedition. Mr. Bumble emerged at early morning from the workhouse-gate, and walked with portly carriage and commanding steps, up the High Street.
He was in the full bloom and pride of beadlehood; his cocked hat and coat were dazzling in the morning sun; he clutched his
cane24 with the vigorous
tenacity25 of health and power.
Mr. Bumble always carried his head high; but this morning it was higher than usual.
There was an abstraction in his eye, an
elevation26 in his air, which might have warned an observant stranger that thoughts were passing in the beadle's mind, too great for
utterance27. Mr. Bumble stopped not to
converse28 with the small shopkeepers and others who
spoke29 to him,
deferentially30, as he passed along.
He merely returned their salutations with a wave of his hand, and relaxed not in his
dignified31 pace, until he reached the farm where Mrs. Mann tended the infant
paupers32 with parochial care. 'Drat that beadle!' said Mrs. Mann, hearing the well-known shaking at the garden-gate.
'If it isn't him at this time in the morning!
Lauk, Mr. Bumble, only think of its being you!
Well, dear me, it IS a pleasure, this is!
Come into the parlour, sir, please.' The first sentence was addressed to Susan; and the
exclamations34 of delight were uttered to Mr. Bumble: as the good lady unlocked the garden-gate: and showed him, with great attention and respect, into the house. 'Mrs. Mann,' said Mr. Bumble; not sitting upon, or dropping himself into a seat, as any common jackanapes would: but letting himself gradually and slowly down into a chair; 'Mrs. Mann, ma'am, good morning.' 'Well, and good morning to _you_, sir,' replied Mrs. Mann, with many smiles; 'and hoping you find yourself well, sir!' 'So-so, Mrs. Mann,' replied the beadle.
'A porochial life is not a bed of roses, Mrs. Mann.' 'Ah, that it isn't indeed, Mr. Bumble,' rejoined the lady. And all the infant paupers might have chorussed the rejoinder with great
propriety35, if they had heard it. 'A porochial life, ma'am,' continued Mr. Bumble, striking the table with his cane, 'is a life of worrit, and vexation, and hardihood; but all public characters, as I may say, must suffer
prosecution37.' Mrs. Mann, not very well knowing what the beadle meant, raised her hands with a look of sympathy, and sighed. 'Ah!
You may well sigh, Mrs. Mann!' said the beadle. Finding she had done right, Mrs. Mann sighed again:
evidently to the satisfaction of the public character:#p#分页标题#e#
who, repressing a
complacent38 smile by looking sternly at his cocked hat, said, 'Mrs. Mann, I am going to London.' 'Lauk, Mr. Bumble!' cried Mrs. Mann, starting back. 'To London, ma'am,' resumed the
inflexible39 beadle, 'by coach.
I and two paupers, Mrs. Mann!
A legal action is a coming on, about a settlement; and the board has appointed me--me, Mrs. Mann--to dispose to the matter before the quarter-sessions at Clerkinwell. And I very much question,' added Mr. Bumble, drawing himself up, 'whether the Clerkinwell Sessions will not find themselves in the wrong box before they have done with me.' 'Oh! you mustn't be too hard upon them, sir,' said Mrs. Mann,
coaxingly40. 'The Clerkinwell Sessions have brought it upon themselves, ma'am,' replied Mr. Bumble; 'and if the Clerkinwell Sessions find that they come off rather worse than they expected, the Clerkinwell Sessions have only themselves to thank.' There was so much determination and depth of purpose about the menacing manner in which Mr. Bumble delivered himself of these words, that Mrs. Mann appeared quite
awed41 by them. At length she said, 'You're going by coach, sir?
I thought it was always usual to send them paupers in carts.' 'That's when they're ill, Mrs. Mann,' said the beadle.
'We put the sick paupers into open carts in the rainy weather, to prevent their taking cold.' 'Oh!' said Mrs. Mann. 'The
opposition42 coach contracts for these two; and takes them cheap,' said Mr. Bumble.
'They are both in a very low state, and we find it would come two pound cheaper to move 'em than to bury 'em--that is, if we can throw 'em upon another parish, which I think we shall be able to do, if they don't die upon the road to spite us.
Ha! ha! ha!' When Mr. Bumble had laughed a little while, his eyes again encountered the cocked hat; and he became grave. 'We are forgetting business, ma'am,' said the beadle; 'here is your porochial
stipend43 for the month.' Mr. Bumble produced some silver money rolled up in paper, from his pocket-book; and requested a receipt:
which Mrs. Mann wrote. 'It's very much
blotted44, sir,' said the farmer of infants; 'but it's formal enough, I dare say.
Thank you, Mr. Bumble, sir, I am very much obliged to you, I'm sure.' Mr. Bumble nodded,
blandly45, in acknowledgment of Mrs. Mann's curtsey; and inquired how the children were. 'Bless their dear little hearts!' said Mrs. Mann with emotion, 'they're as well as can be, the dears!
Of course, except the two that died last week.
And little Dick.' 'Isn't that boy no better?' inquired Mr. Bumble. Mrs. Mann shook her head. 'He's a ill-conditioned, wicious, bad-disposed porochial child that,' said Mr. Bumble angrily.
'Where is he?' 'I'll bring him to you in one minute, sir,' replied Mrs. Mann. 'Here, you Dick!' After some calling, Dick was discovered.
Having had his face put under the pump, and dried upon Mrs. Mann's gown, he was led into the awful presence of Mr. Bumble, the beadle. The child was pale and thin; his cheeks were sunken; and his eyes large and bright.
The
scanty46 parish dress, the livery of his
misery47, hung loosely on his feeble body; and his young limbs had wasted away, like those of an old man. Such was the little being who stood trembling beneath Mr. Bumble's glance; not daring to lift his eyes from the floor; and
dreading48 even to hear the beadle's voice. 'Can't you look at the gentleman, you
obstinate49 boy?' said Mrs. Mann. The child
meekly50 raised his eyes, and encountered those of Mr. Bumble. 'What's the matter with you, porochial Dick?' inquired Mr. Bumble, with well-timed jocularity. 'Nothing, sir,' replied the child faintly. 'I should think not,' said Mrs. Mann, who had of course laughed very much at Mr. Bumble's humour. 'You want for nothing, I'm sure.' 'I should like--'
faltered52 the child. 'Hey-day!' interposed Mr. Mann, 'I suppose you're going to say that you DO want for something, now?
Why, you little
wretch53--' 'Stop, Mrs. Mann, stop!' said the beadle, raising his hand with a show of authority.
'Like what, sir, eh?' 'I should like,' faltered the child, 'if somebody that can write, would put a few words down for me on a piece of paper, and fold it up and seal it, and keep it for me, after I am laid in the ground.' 'Why, what does the boy mean?' exclaimed Mr. Bumble, on whom the earnest manner and
wan51 aspect of the child had made some impression: accustomed as he was to such things.
'What do you mean, sir?' 'I should like,' said the child, 'to leave my dear love to poor Oliver Twist; and to let him know how often I have sat by myself and cried to think of his wandering about in the dark nights with nobody to help him.#p#分页标题#e#
And I should like to tell him,' said the child pressing his small hands together, and speaking with great fervour, 'that I was glad to die when I was very young; for, perhaps, if I had lived to be a man, and had grown old, my little sister who is in Heaven, might forget me, or be unlike me; and it would be so much happier if we were both children there together.' Mr. Bumble surveyed the little speaker, from head to foot, with indescribable
astonishment54; and, turning to his companion, said, 'They're all in one story, Mrs. Mann.
That out-dacious Oliver had demogalized them all!' 'I couldn't have believed it, sir' said Mrs Mann, holding up her hands, and looking
malignantly55 at Dick.
'I never see such a hardened little wretch!' 'Take him away, ma'am!' said Mr. Bumble imperiously.
'This must be stated to the board, Mrs. Mann. 'I hope the gentleman will understand that it isn't my fault, sir?' said Mrs. Mann, whimpering pathetically. 'They shall understand that, ma'am; they shall be acquainted with the true state of the case,' said Mr. Bumble.
'There; take him away, I can't bear the sight on him.' Dick was immediately taken away, and locked up in the coal-cellar.
Mr. Bumble shortly afterwards took himself off, to prepare for his journey. At six o'clock next morning, Mr. Bumble:
having exchanged his cocked hat for a round one, and encased his person in a blue great-coat with a
cape56 to it:
took his place on the outside of the coach, accompanied by the criminals whose settlement was disputed; with whom, in due course of time, he arrived in London. He experienced no other crosses on the way, than those which originated in the
perverse57 behaviour of the two paupers, who persisted in shivering, and complaining of the cold, in a manner which, Mr. Bumble declared, caused his teeth to
chatter58 in his head, and made him feel quite uncomfortable; although he had a great-coat on. Having disposed of these evil-minded persons for the night, Mr. Bumble sat himself down in the house at which the coach stopped; and took a
temperate59 dinner of steaks,
oyster60 sauce, and porter. Putting a glass of hot gin-and-water on the chimney-piece, he drew his chair to the fire; and, with
sundry61 moral reflections on the too-prevalent sin of discontent and complaining, composed himself to read the paper. The very first paragraph upon which Mr. Bumble's eye rested, was the following advertisement. 'FIVE GUINEAS REWARD 'Whereas a young boy, named Oliver Twist,
absconded62, or was
enticed63, on Thursday evening last, from his home, at Pentonville; and has not since been heard of.
The above reward will be paid to any person who will give such information as will lead to the discovery of the said Oliver Twist, or tend to throw any light upon his previous history, in which the advertiser is, for many reasons, warmly interested.' And then followed a full description of Oliver's dress, person, appearance, and
disappearance64:
with the name and address of Mr. Brownlow at full length. Mr. Bumble opened his eyes; read the advertisement, slowly and carefully, three several times; and in something more than five minutes was on his way to Pentonville: having actually, in his excitement, left the glass of hot gin-and-water, untasted. 'Is Mr. Brownlow at home?' inquired Mr. Bumble of the girl who opened the door. To this
inquiry65 the girl returned the not
uncommon66, but rather evasive reply of 'I don't know; where do you come from?' Mr. Bumble no sooner uttered Oliver's name, in explanation of his errand, than Mrs. Bedwin, who had been listening at the parlour door, hastened into the passage in a breathless state. 'Come in, come in,' said the old lady: 'I knew we should hear of him.
Poor dear!
I knew we should!
I was certain of it.
Bless his heart!
I said so all along.' Having heard this, the
worthy67 old lady hurried back into the parlour again; and seating herself on a sofa, burst into tears. The girl, who was not quite so
susceptible68, had run upstairs meanwhile; and now returned with a request that Mr. Bumble would follow her immediately:
which he did. He was shown into the little back study, where sat Mr. Brownlow and his friend Mr. Grimwig, with decanters and glasses before them.
The latter gentleman at once burst into the
exclamation33: 'A beadle.
A parish beadle, or I'll eat my head.' 'Pray don't interrupt just now,' said Mr. Brownlow.
'Take a seat, will you?' Mr. Bumble sat himself down; quite confounded by the oddity of Mr. Grimwig's manner.
Mr. Brownlow moved the lamp, so as to obtain an uninterrupted view of the beadle's
countenance69; and said, with a little
impatience70, 'Now, sir, you come in consequence of having seen the advertisement?' 'Yes, sir,' said Mr. Bumble. 'And you ARE a beadle, are you not?' inquired Mr. Grimwig. 'I am a porochial beadle, gentlemen,' rejoined Mr. Bumble proudly. 'Of course,' observed Mr. Grimwig aside to his friend, 'I knew he was.#p#分页标题#e#
A beadle all over!' Mr. Brownlow gently shook his head to impose silence on his friend, and resumed: 'Do you know where this poor boy is now?' 'No more than nobody,' replied Mr. Bumble. 'Well, what DO you know of him?' inquired the old gentleman. 'Speak out, my friend, if you have anything to say.
What DO you know of him?' 'You don't happen to know any good of him, do you?' said Mr. Grimwig,
caustically71; after an
attentive72 perusal73 of Mr. Bumble's features. Mr. Bumble,
catching74 at the inquiry very quickly, shook his head with
portentous75 solemnity. 'You see?' said Mr. Grimwig, looking
triumphantly76 at Mr. Brownlow. Mr. Brownlow looked
apprehensively77 at Mr. Bumble's pursed-up countenance; and requested him to communicate what he knew regarding Oliver, in as few words as possible. Mr. Bumble put down his hat; unbuttoned his coat; folded his arms; inclined his head in a retrospective manner; and, after a few moments' reflection, commenced his story. It would be tedious if given in the beadle's words:
occupying, as it did, some twenty minutes in the telling; but the sum and substance of it was, that Oliver was a foundling, born of low and vicious parents.
That he had terminated his brief career in the place of his birth, by making a sanguinary and cowardly attack on an unoffending lad, and running away in the night-time from his master's house.
In proof of his really being the person he represented himself, Mr. Bumble laid upon the table the papers he had brought to town. Folding his arms again, he then awaited Mr. Brownlow's observations. 'I fear it is all too true,' said the old gentleman sorrowfully, after looking over the papers.
'This is not much for your intelligence; but I would gladly have given you treble the money, if it had been
favourable80 to the boy.' It is not improbable that if Mr. Bumble had been
possessed81 of this information at an earlier period of the interview, he might have imparted a very different colouring to his little history. It was too late to do it now, however; so he shook his head gravely, and, pocketing the five guineas, withdrew. Mr. Brownlow paced the room to and fro for some minutes; evidently so much disturbed by the beadle's tale, that even Mr. Grimwig forbore to
vex36 him further. At length he stopped, and rang the bell violently. 'Mrs. Bedwin,' said Mr. Brownlow, when the
housekeeper82 appeared; 'that boy, Oliver, is an imposter.' 'It can't be, sir.
It cannot be,' said the old lady energetically. 'I tell you he is,' retorted the old gentleman.
'What do you mean by can't be?
We have just heard a full account of him from his birth; and he has been a thorough-paced little
villain83, all his life.' 'I never will believe it, sir,' replied the old lady, firmly. 'Never!' 'You old women never believe anything but quack-doctors, and lying story-books,'
growled84 Mr. Grimwig.
'I knew it all along. Why didn't you take my advise in the beginning; you would if he hadn't had a fever, I suppose, eh?
He was interesting, wasn't he?
Interesting!
Bah!'
And Mr. Grimwig
poked85 the fire with a flourish. 'He was a dear, grateful, gentle child, sir,' retorted Mrs. Bedwin, indignantly.
'I know what children are, sir; and have done these forty years; and people who can't say the same, shouldn't say anything about them.
That's my opinion!' This was a hard hit at Mr. Grimwig, who was a bachelor.
As it
extorted86 nothing from that gentleman but a smile, the old lady tossed her head, and smoothed down her
apron87 preparatory to another speech, when she was stopped by Mr. Brownlow. 'Silence!' said the old gentleman,
feigning88 an anger he was far from feeling.
'Never let me hear the boy's name again.
I rang to tell you that.
Never.
You may leave the room, Mrs. Bedwin.
Remember!
I am in earnest.' There were sad hearts at Mr. Brownlow's that night. Oliver's heart sank within him, when he thought of his good friends; it was well for him that he could not know what they had heard, or it might have broken
outright90.