Chapter 92
I made an exceptional botanical discovery. But there will be many who disbelieve the following episode. Still, I give it to you now because it's part of the story and it happened to me.
I was on my side. It was an hour or two past noon on a day of quiet sunshine and gentle breeze. I had slept a short while, a
diluted1 sleep that had brought no rest and no dreams. I turned over to my other side,
expending2 as little energy as possible in doing so. I opened my eyes.
In the near distance I saw trees. I did not react. I was certain it was an illusion that a few blinks would make disappear.
The trees remained. In fact, they grew to be a forest. They were part of a low-lying island. I pushed myself up. I continued to disbelieve my eyes. But it was a thrill to be
deluded3 in such a high-quality way. The trees were beautiful. They were like none I had ever seen before. They had a pale bark, and equally distributed branches that carried an amazing
profusion4 of leaves. These leaves were brilliantly green, a green so bright and emerald that, next to it, vegetation during the
monsoons5 was drab olive.
I looked down. I was both satisfied and disappointed with what I saw. The island had no soil. Not that the trees stood in water. Rather, they stood in what appeared to be a
dense10 mass of vegetation, as sparkling green as the leaves. Who had ever heard of land with no soil? With trees growing out of pure vegetation? I felt satisfaction because such a geology confirmed that I was right, that this island was a
chimera11, a play of the mind. By the same token I felt disappointment because an island, any island, however strange, would have been very good to come upon.
Since the trees continued to stand, I continued to look. To take in green, after so much blue, was like music to my eyes. Green is a lovely colour. It is the colour of Islam. It is my favourite colour.
The current gently pushed the lifeboat closer to the illusion. Its shore could not be called a beach, there being neither sand nor
pebbles12, and there was no pounding of surf either, since the waves that fell upon the island simply vanished into its
porosity13. From a
ridge14 some three hundred yards inland, the island sloped to the sea and, forty or so yards into it, fell off precipitously, disappearing from sight into the depths of the Pacific, surely the smallest
continental15 shelf on record.
I was getting used to the mental
delusion16. To make it last I refrained from putting a strain on it; when the lifeboat nudged the island, I did not move, only continued to dream. The
fabric17 of the island seemed to be an intricate, tightly webbed mass of tube-shaped seaweed, in diameter a little thicker than two fingers. What a fanciful island, I thought.
After some minutes I crept up to the side of the boat. "Look for green," said the survival manual. Well, this was green. In fact, it was chlorophyll heaven. A green to outshine food colouring and flashing neon lights. A green to get drunk on. "Ultimately, a foot is the only good judge of land," pursued the manual. The island was within reach of a foot. To judge - and be disappointed - or not to judge, that was the question.
I
decided19 to judge. I looked about to see if there were sharks. There were none. I turned on my stomach, and holding on to the
tarpaulin20, I slowly brought a leg down. My foot entered the sea. It was pleasingly cool. The island lay just a little further down,
shimmering21 in the water. I stretched. I expected the bubble of illusion to burst at any second.
It did not. My foot sank into clear water and met the rubbery resistance of something flexible but solid. I put more weight down. The illusion would not give. I put my full weight on my foot. Still I did not sink. Still I did not believe.
Finally, it was my nose that was the judge of land. It came to my
olfactory22 sense, full and fresh, overwhelming: the smell of vegetation. I
gasped23. After months of nothing but salt-water-bleached smells, this
reek25 of vegetable organic matter was
intoxicating26. It was then that I believed, and the only thing that sank was my mind; my thought process became disjointed. My leg began to shake.
"My God! My God!" I whimpered.
I fell overboard.
The combined shock of solid land and cool water gave me the strength to pull myself forward onto the island. I
babbled28 incoherent thanks to God and
collapsed29.
But I could not stay still. I was too excited. I attempted to get to my feet. Blood rushed away from my head. The ground shook violently. A dizzying blindness overcame me. I thought I would faint. I steadied myself. All I seemed able to do was pant. I managed to sit up.
"Richard Parker! Land! Land! We are saved!" I shouted.
The smell of vegetation was
extraordinarily30 strong. As for the greenness, it was so fresh and
soothing31 that strength and comfort seemed to be
physically32 pouring into my system through my eyes.
What was this strange, tubular seaweed, so intricately
entangled33? Was it
edible34? It seemed to be a variety of
marine35 algae36, but quite
rigid37, far more so than normal algae. The feel of it in the hand was wet and as of something crunchy. I pulled at it.
Strands38 of it broke off without too much effort. In cross-section it consisted of two concentric walls: the wet, slightly rough outer wall, so
vibrantly39 green, and an inner wall midway between the outer wall and the core of the algae. The division in the two tubes that resulted was very plain: the centre tube was white in colour, while the tube that surrounded it was decreasingly green as it approached the inner wall. I brought a piece of the algae to my nose. Beyond the agreeable
fragrance40 of the vegetable, it had a neutral smell. I licked it. My pulse quickened. The algae was wet with fresh water.
I bit into it. My chops were in for a shock. The inner tube was bitterly salty - but the outer was not only edible, it was delicious. My tongue began to tremble as if it were a finger
flipping41 through a dictionary, trying to find a long-forgotten word. It found it, and my eyes closed with pleasure at hearing it: sweet. Not as in good, but as in sugary. Turtles and fish are many things, but they are never, ever sugary. The algae had a light sweetness that outdid in delight even the sap of our
maple42 trees here in Canada. In
consistency43, the closest I can compare it to is water
chestnuts44.
Saliva45 forcefully
oozed46 through the dry pastiness of my mouth. Making loud noises of pleasure, I tore at the algae around me. The inner and outer tubes separated cleanly and easily. I began stuffing the sweet outer into my mouth. I went at it with both hands, force-feeding my mouth and setting it to work harder and faster than it had in a very long time. I ate till there was a regular moat around me.
A
solitary47 tree stood about two hundred feet away. It was the only tree downhill from the ridge, which seemed a very long way off. I say ridge; the word perhaps gives an incorrect impression of how steep the rise from the shore was. The island was low-lying, as I've said. The rise was gentle, to a height of perhaps fifty or sixty feet. But in the state I was in, that height
loomed48 like a mountain. The tree was more
inviting49. I noticed its patch of shade. I tried to stand again. I managed to get to a
squatting50 position but as soon as I made to rise, my head
spun51 and I couldn't keep my balance. And even if I hadn't fallen over, my legs had no strength left in them. But my will was strong. I was
determined52 to move forward. I crawled, dragged myself, weakly leapfrogged to the tree.
I know I will never know a joy so vast as I experienced when I entered that tree's dappled, shimmering shade and heard the dry, crisp sound of the wind
rustling53 its leaves. The tree was not as large or as tall as the ones inland, and for being on the wrong side of the ridge, more exposed to the elements, it was a little scraggly and not so uniformly developed as its mates. But it was a tree, and a tree is a blessedly good thing to
behold54 when you've been lost at sea for a long, long time. I sang that tree's glory, its solid, unhurried purity, its slow beauty. Oh, that I could be like it, rooted to the ground but with my every hand raised up to God in praise! I wept.
As my heart
exalted55 Allah, my mind began to take in information about Allah's works. The tree did indeed grow right out of the algae, as I had seen from the lifeboat. There was not the least trace of soil. Either there was soil deeper down, or this species of tree was a
remarkable56 instance of a commensal or a
parasite57. The trunk was about the width of a man's chest. The bark was greyish green in colour, thin and smooth, and soft enough that I could mark it with my fingernail. The cordate leaves were large and broad, and ended in a single point. The head of the tree had the lovely full roundness of a mango tree, but it was not a mango. I thought it smelled somewhat like a lote tree, but it wasn't a lote either. Nor a
mangrove58. Nor any other tree I had ever seen. All I know was that it was beautiful and green and lush with leaves.
I heard a
growl59. I turned. Richard Parker was observing me from the lifeboat. He was looking at the island, too. He seemed to want to come
ashore60 but was afraid. Finally, after much
snarling61 and pacing, he leapt from the boat. I brought the orange whistle to my mouth. But he didn't have
aggression62 on his mind. Simple balance was enough of a challenge; he was as wobbly on his feet as I was. When he advanced, he crawled close to the ground and with trembling limbs, like a newborn
cub63. Giving me a wide
berth64, he made for the ridge and disappeared into the interior of the island.
I passed the day eating, resting, attempting to stand and, in a general way, bathing in
bliss65. I felt nauseous when I exerted myself too much. And I kept feeling that the ground was shifting beneath me and that I was going to fall over, even when I was sitting still.
I started worrying about Richard Parker in the late afternoon. Now that the setting, the territory, had changed, I wasn't sure how he would take to me if he came upon me.
Reluctantly,
strictly66 for safety's sake, I crawled back to the lifeboat. However Richard Parker took possession of the island, the bow and the tarpaulin remained my territory. I searched for something to
moor67 the lifeboat to. Evidently the algae covered the shore thickly, for it was all I could find. Finally, I resolved the problem by driving an
oar27, handle first, deep into the algae and tethering the boat to it.
I crawled onto the tarpaulin. I was
exhausted68. My body was spent from taking in so much food, and there was the nervous tension arising from my sudden change of fortunes. As the day ended, I
hazily69 remember hearing Richard Parker roaring in the distance, but sleep overcame me.
I awoke in the night with a strange, uncomfortable feeling in my lower
belly70. I thought it was a
cramp71, that perhaps I had poisoned myself with the algae. I heard a noise. I looked. Richard Parker was aboard. He had returned while I was sleeping. He was meowing and licking the pads of his feet. I found his return puzzling but thought no further about it - the cramp was quickly getting worse. I was doubled over with pain, shaking with it, when a process, normal for most but long forgotten by me, set itself into motion: defecation. It was very painful, but afterwards I fell into the deepest, most
refreshing72 sleep I had had since the night before the Tsimtsum sank.
When I woke up in the morning I felt much stronger. I crawled to the solitary tree in a vigorous way. My eyes feasted once more upon it, as did my stomach on the algae. I had such a
plentiful73 breakfast that I dug a big hole.
Richard Parker once again hesitated for hours before jumping off the boat. When he did, mid-morning, as soon as he landed on the shore he jumped back and half fell in the water and seemed very tense. He
hissed74 and clawed the air with a paw. It was curious. I had no idea what he was doing. His anxiety passed, and noticeably surer-footed than the previous day, he disappeared another time over the ridge.
That day, leaning against the tree, I stood. I felt dizzy. The only way I could make the ground stop moving was to close my eyes and grip the tree. I pushed off and tried to walk. I fell instantly. The ground rushed up to me before I could move a foot. No harm done. The island, coated with such tightly woven, rubbery vegetation, was an ideal place to relearn how to walk. I could fall any which way, it was impossible to hurt myself.
The next day, after another restful night on the boat - to which, once again, Richard Parker had returned - I was able to walk. Falling half a dozen times, I managed to reach the tree. I could feel my strength increasing by the hour. With the gaff I reached up and pulled down a branch from the tree. I plucked off some leaves. They were soft and unwaxed, but they tasted bitter. Richard Parker was attached to his
den9 on the lifeboat - that was my explanation for why he had returned another night.
I saw him coming back that evening, as the sun was setting. I had retethered the lifeboat to the buried oar. I was at the bow, checking that the rope was properly secured to the stem. He appeared all of a sudden. At first I didn't recognize him. This magnificent animal bursting over the ridge at full
gallop75 couldn't possibly be the same listless, bedraggled tiger who was my companion in misfortune? But it was. It was Richard Parker and he was coming my way at high speed. He looked purposeful. His powerful neck rose above his lowered head. His coat and his muscles shook at every step. I could hear the drumming of his heavy body against the ground.
I have read that there are two fears that cannot be trained out of us: the startle reaction upon hearing an unexpected noise, and
vertigo76. I would like to add a third, to wit, the rapid and direct approach of a known
killer77.
I
fumbled78 for the whistle. When he was twenty-five feet from the lifeboat I blew into the whistle with all my might. A piercing cry split the air.
It had the desired effect. Richard Parker braked. But he clearly wanted to move forward again. I blew a second time. He started turning and
hopping79 on the spot in a most
peculiar80, deer-like way, snarling fiercely. I blew a third time. Every hair on him was raised. His claws were full out. He was in a state of extreme
agitation81. I feared that the
defensive82 wall of my whistle blows was about to
crumble83 and that he would attack me.
Instead, Richard Parker did the most unexpected thing: he jumped into the sea. I was
astounded84. The very thing I thought he would never do, he did, and with might and resolve. He energetically paddled his way to the stern of the lifeboat. I thought of blowing again, but instead opened the
locker85 lid and sat down, retreating to the inner sanctum of my territory.
He surged onto the stern, quantities of water pouring off him, making my end of the boat pitch up. He balanced on the gunnel and the stern bench for a moment, assessing me. My heart grew faint. I did not think I would be able to blow into the whistle again. I looked at him blankly. He flowed down to the floor of the lifeboat and disappeared under the tarpaulin. I could see parts of him from the edges of the locker lid. I threw myself upon the tarpaulin, out of his sight - but directly above him. I felt an overwhelming urge to
sprout86 wings and fly off.
I calmed down. I reminded myself forcefully that this had been my situation for the last long while, to be living with a live tiger hot beneath me.
As my breathing slowed down, sleep came to me.
Sometime during the night I awoke and, my fear forgotten, looked over. He was dreaming: he was shaking and
growling87 in his sleep. He was loud enough about it to have woken me up.
In the morning, as usual, he went over the ridge.
I decided that as soon as I was strong enough I would go exploring the inland. It seemed quite large, if the shoreline was any indication; left and right it stretched on with only a slight curve, showing the island to have a fair girth. I spent the day walking - and falling - from the shore to the tree and back, in an attempt to restore my legs to health. At every fall I had a full meal of algae.
When Richard Parker returned as the day was ending, a little earlier than the previous day, I was expecting him. I sat tight and did not blow the whistle. He came to the water's edge and in one
mighty88 leap reached the side of the lifeboat. He entered his territory without
intruding89 into mine, only causing the boat to
lurch90 to one side. His return to form was quite terrifying.
The next morning, after giving Richard Parker plenty of advance, I set off to explore the island. I walked up to the ridge. I reached it easily, proudly moving one foot ahead of the other in a gait that was spirited if still a little awkward. Had my legs been weaker they would have given way beneath me when I saw what I saw beyond the ridge.
To start with details, I saw that the whole island was covered with the algae, not just its edges. I saw a great green plateau with a green forest in its centre. I saw all around this forest hundreds of evenly
scattered91, identically sized ponds with trees
sparsely92 distributed in a uniform way between them, the whole arrangement giving the unmistakable impression of following a design.
But it was the meerkats that impressed themselves most indelibly on my mind. I saw in one look what I would conservatively estimate to be hundreds of thousasands of meerkats. The landscape was covered in meerkats. And when I appeared, it seamed that all of them turned to me, astonished, like chickens in a farmyard, and stood up.
We didn't have any meerkats in our zoo. But I had read about them. They were in the books and in the literature. A meerkat is a small South African mammal related to the mongoose; in other words, a carnivorous
burrower93, a foot long and weighing two pounds when mature, slender and weasel-like in build, with a
pointed8 snout, eyes sitting squarely at the front of its face, short legs, paws with four toes and long, non-retractile claws, and an eight-inch tail. Its fur is light brown to grey in colour with black or brown bands on its back, while the tip of its tail, its ears and the characteristic circles around its eyes are black. It is an
agile94 and keen-sighted creature,
diurnal95 and social in habits, and feeding in its native range - the Kalahari Desert of southern Africa - on, among other things,
scorpions96, to whose
venom97 it is completely immune. When it is on the
lookout98, the meerkat has the
peculiarity99 of
standing100 perfectly101 upright on the tips of its back legs, balancing itself tripod-like with its tail. Often a group of meerkats will take the stance collectively, standing in a
huddle102 and gazing in the same direction, looking like commuters waiting for a bus. The earnest expression on their faces, and the way their front paws hang before them, make them look either like children self-consciously posing for a photographer or patients in a doctor's office stripped naked and
demurely103 trying to cover their genitals.
That is what I
beheld104 in one glance, hundreds of thousands of meerkats - more, a million - turning to me and standing at attention, as if saying, "Yes, sir?" Mind you, a standing meerkat reaches up eighteen inches at most, so it was not the height of these creatures that was so breathtaking as their
unlimited105 multitude. I stood rooted to the spot, speechless. If I set a million meerkats fleeing in terror the
chaos106 would be indescribable. But their interest in me was shortlived. After a few seconds, they went back to doing what they had been doing before I appeared, which was either
nibbling107 at the algae or staring into the ponds. To see so many beings bending down at the same time reminded me of prayer time in a
mosque108.
The creatures seemed to feel no fear. As I moved down from the ridge, none shied away or showed the least tension at my presence. If I had wanted to, I could have touched one, even picked one up. I did nothing of the sort. I simply walked into what was surely the largest colony of meerkats in the world, one of the strangest, most wonderful experiences of my life. There was a ceaseless noise in the air. It was their
squeaking109,
chirping110, twittering and barking. Such were their numbers and the
vagaries111 of their excitement that the noise came and went like a flock of birds, at times very loud,
swirling112 around me, then rapidly dying off as the closest meerkats fell silent while others, further off, started up.
Were they not afraid of me because I should be afraid of them? The question crossed my mind. But the answer - that they were harmless - was immediately apparent. To get close to a pond, around which they were
densely113 packed, I had to nudge them away with my feet so as not to step on one. They took to my barging without any offence, making room for me like a good-natured crowd. I felt warm,
furry114 bodies against my ankles as I looked into a pond.
All the ponds had the same round shape and were about the same size-roughly forty feet in diameter. I expected shallowness. I saw nothing but deep, clear water. The ponds seemed bottomless, in fact. And as far down as I could see, their sides consisted of green algae. Evidently the layer atop the island was very substantial.
I could see nothing that accounted for the meerkats'
fixed115 curiosity, and I might have given up on solving the mystery had squeaking and barking not erupted at a pond nearby. Meerkats were jumping up and down in a state of great
ferment116. Suddenly, by the hundreds, they began diving into the pond. There was much pushing and shoving as the meerkats behind vied to reach the pond's edge. The
frenzy118 was collective; even tiny meerkittens were making for the water, barely being held back by mothers and
guardians119. I stared in disbelief. These were not standard Kalahari Desert meerkats. Standard Kalahari Desert meerkats do not behave like frogs. These meerkats were most definitely a subspecies that had
specialized120 in a fascinating and surprising way.
I made for the pond, bringing my feet down gingerly, in time to see meerkats swimming - actually swimming - and bringing to shore fish by the dozens, and not small fish either. Some were dorados that would have been unqualified feasts on the lifeboat. They
dwarfed121 the meerkats. It was incomprehensible to me how meerkats could catch such fish.
It was as the meerkats were hauling the fish out of the pond, displaying real
feats123 of teamwork, that I noticed something curious: every fish, without exception, was already dead. Freshly dead. The meerkats were bringing ashore dead fish they had not killed.
I kneeled by the pond, pushing aside several excited, wet meerkats. I touched the water. It was cooler than I'd expected. There was a current that was bringing colder water from below. I cupped a little water in my hand and brought it to my mouth. I took a
sip124.
It was fresh water. This explained how the fish had died - for, of course, place a saltwater fish in fresh water and it will quickly become bloated and die. But what were seafaring fish doing in a freshwater pond? How had they got there?
I went to another pond, making my way through the meerkats. It too was fresh. Another pond; the same. And again with a fourth pond.
They were all freshwater ponds. Where had such quantities of fresh water come from, I asked myself. The answer was obvious: from the algae. The algae naturally and continuously desalinated sea water, which was why its core was salty while its outer surface was wet with fresh water: it was
oozing125 the fresh water out. I did not ask myself why the algae did this, or how, or where the salt went. My mind stopped asking such questions. I simply laughed and jumped into a pond. I found it hard to stay at the surface of the water; I was still very weak, and I had little fat on me to help me float. I held on to the edge of the pond. The effect of bathing in pure, clean, salt-free water was more than I can put into words. After such a long time at sea, my skin was like a hide and my hair was long, matted and as silky as a fly-catching strip. I felt even my soul had been
corroded126 by salt. So, under the gaze of a thousand meerkats, I soaked, allowing fresh water to dissolve every salt crystal that had
tainted127 me.
The meerkats looked away. They did it like one man, all of them turning in the same direction at exactly the same time. I pulled myself out to see what it was. It was Richard Parker. He confirmed what I had suspected, that these meerkats had gone for so many generations without
predators128 that any notion of flight distance, of flight, of plain fear, had been
genetically129 weeded out of them. He was moving through them, blazing a trail of murder and mayhem,
devouring130 one meerkat after another, blood dripping from his mouth, and they, cheek to jowl with a tiger, were jumping up and down on the spot, as if crying, "My turn! My turn! My turn!" I would see this scene time and again. Nothing distracted the meerkats from their little lives of pond staring and algae nibbling. Whether Richard Parker
skulked131 up in masterly tiger fashion before landing upon them in a thunder of roaring, or slouched by indifferently, it was all the same to them. They were not to be
ruffled132.
Meekness133 ruled.
He killed beyond his need. He killed meerkats that he did not eat. In animals, the urge to kill is separate from the urge to eat. To go for so long without
prey134 and suddenly to have so many - his pent-up hunting instinct was
lashing18 out with a
vengeance135.
He was far away. There was no danger to me. At least for the moment.
The next morning, after he had gone, I cleaned the lifeboat. It needed it badly. I won't describe what the accumulation of human and animal skeletons, mixed in with innumerable fish and turtle
remains136, looked like. The whole
foul137, disgusting mess went overboard. I didn't dare step onto the floor of the boat for fear of leaving a
tangible138 trace of my presence to Richard Parker, so the job had to be done with the gaff from the tarpaulin or from the side of the boat, standing in the water. What I could not clean up with the gaff - the smells and the
smears139 - I
rinsed140 with buckets of water.
That night he entered his new, clean den without comment. In his
jaws141 were a number of dead meerkats, which he ate during the night.
I spent the following days eating and drinking and bathing and observing the meerkats and walking and running and resting and growing stronger. My running became smooth and unselfconscious, a source of euphoria. My skin healed. My pains and aches left me. Put simply, I returned to life.
I explored the island. I tried to walk around it but gave up. I estimate that it was about six or seven miles in diameter, which means a
circumference142 of about twenty miles. What I saw seemed to indicate that the shore was unvarying in its features. The same blinding greenness throughout, the same ridge, the same incline from ridge to water, the same break in the monotony: a scraggly tree here and there. Exploring the shore revealed one extraordinary thing: the algae, and therefore the island itself,
varied143 in height and
density144 depending on the weather. On very hot days, the algae's weave became tight and dense, and the island increased in height; the climb to the ridge became steeper and the ridge higher. It was not a quick process. Only a hot spell
lasting145 several days triggered it. But it was unmistakable. I believe it had to do with water conservation, with exposing less of the algae's surface to the sun's rays.
The
converse146 phenomenon - the loosening of the island - was faster, more dramatic, and the reasons for it more evident. At such times the ridge came down, and the continental shelf, so to speak, stretched out, and the algae along the shore became so slack that I tended to catch my feet in it. This loosening was brought on by
overcast147 weather and, faster still, by heavy seas.
I lived through a major storm while on the island, and after the experience, I would have trusted staying on it during the worst hurricane. It was an awe-inspiring spectacle to sit in a tree and see giant waves charging the island, seemingly preparing to ride up the ridge and
unleash148 bedlam149 and chaos - only to see each one melt away as if it had come upon quicksand. In this respect, the island was Gandhian: it resisted by not resisting. Every wave vanished into the island without a clash, with only a little frothing and
foaming150. A
tremor151 shaking the ground and
ripples152 wrinkling the surface of the ponds were the only indications that some great force was passing through. And pass through it did: in the lee of the island,
considerably153 diminished, waves emerged and went on their way. It was the strangest sight, that, to see waves leaving a shoreline. The storm, and the resulting
minor154 earthquakes, did not
perturb155 the meerkats in the least. They went about their business as if the elements did not exist.
Harder to understand was the island's complete desolation. I never saw such a stripped-down ecology. The air of the place carried no flies, no butterflies, no bees, no insects of any kind. The trees sheltered no birds. The plains hid no
rodents156, no grubs, no worms, no snakes, no scorpions; they gave rise to no other trees, no
shrubs157, no grasses, no flowers. The ponds harboured no freshwater fish. The seashore
teemed158 with no weeds, no
crabs159, no crayfish, no coral, no pebbles, no rocks. With the single, notable exception of the meerkats, there was not the least foreign matter on the island, organic or
inorganic160. It was nothing but shining green algae and shining green trees.
The trees were not
parasites161. I discovered this one day when I ate so much algae at the base of a small tree that I exposed its roots. I saw that the roots did not go their own independent way into the algae, but rather joined it, became it. Which meant that these trees either lived in a
symbiotic162 relationship with the algae, in a giving-and-taking that was to their
mutual163 advantage, or, simpler still, were an integral part of the algae. I would guess that the latter was the case because the trees did not seem to bear flowers or fruit. I doubt that an independent organism, however intimate the
symbiosis164 it has entered upon, would give up on so essential a part of life as reproduction. The leaves' appetite for the sun, as testified by their abundance, their breadth and their super-chlorophyll greenness, made me suspect that the trees had primarily an energy-gathering function. But this is
conjecture165.
There is one last observation I would like to make. It is based on intuition rather than hard evidence. It is this: that the island was not an island in the conventional sense of the term - that is, a small landmass rooted to the floor of the ocean - but was rather a free-floating organism, a ball of algae of leviathan proportions. And it is my
hunch166 that the ponds reached down to the sides of this huge, buoyant mass and opened onto the ocean, which explained the otherwise
inexplicable167 presence in them of dorados and other fish of the open seas.
It would all bear much further study, but unfortunately I lost the algae that I took away.
Just as I returned to life, so did Richard Parker. By
dint168 of stuffing himself with meerkats, his weight went up, his fur began to
glisten169 again, and he returned to his healthy look of old. He kept up his habit of returning to the lifeboat at the end of every day. I always made sure I was there before him,
copiously170 marking my territory with urine so that he didn't forget who was who and what was whose. But he left at first light and roamed further afield than I did; the island being the same all over, I generally stayed within one area. I saw very little of him during the day. And I grew nervous. I saw how he raked the trees with his forepaws - great deep
gouges171 in the trunks, they were. And I began to hear his
hoarse172 roaring, that aaonh cry as rich as gold or honey and as
spine173-chilling as the depths of an unsafe mine or a thousand angry bees. That he was searching for a female was not in itself what troubled me; it was that it meant he was comfortable enough on the island to be thinking about producing young. I worried that in this new condition he might not tolerate another male in his territory, his night territory in particular, especially if his
insistent174 cries went unanswered, as surely they would.
One day I was on a walk in the forest. I was walking vigorously, caught up in my own thoughts. I passed a tree - and practically ran into Richard Parker. Both of us were startled. He hissed and reared up on his
hind117 legs, towering over me, his great paws ready to swat me down. I stood frozen to the spot, paralyzed with fear and shock. He dropped back on all fours and moved away. When he had gone three, four paces, he turned and reared up again, growling this time. I continued to stand like a statue. He went another few paces and repeated the threat a third time. Satisfied that I was not a menace, he
ambled175 off. As soon as I had caught my breath and stopped trembling, I brought the whistle to my mouth and started running after him. He had already gone a good distance, but he was still within sight. My running was powerful. He turned, saw me,
crouched176 - and then bolted. I blew into the whistle as hard as I could, wishing that its sound would travel as far and wide as the cry of a lonely tiger.
That night, as he was resting two feet beneath me, I came to the conclusion that I had to step into the circus ring again.
The major difficulty in training animals is that they operate either by instinct or by
rote177. The
shortcut178 of intelligence to make new associations that are not
instinctive179 is
minimally180 available. Therefore,
imprinting181 in an animal's mind the artificial connection that if it does a certain action, say, roll over, it will get a treat can be achieved only by mind-numbing repetition. It is a slow process that depends as much on luck as on hard work, all the more so when the animal is an adult. I blew into the whistle till my lungs hurt. I pounded my chest till it was covered with
bruises182. I shouted "Hep! Hep! Hep!" - my tiger-language command to say "Do!" - thousands of times. I tossed hundreds of meerkat
morsels183 at him that I would gladly have eaten myself. The training of tigers is no easy
feat122. They are considerably less flexible in their mental make-up than other animals that are commonly trained in circuses and zoos - sea lions and chimpanzees, for example. But I don't want to take too much credit for what I managed to do with Richard Parker. My good fortune, the fortune that saved my life, was that he was not only a young adult but a
pliable184 young adult, an omega animal. I was afraid that conditions on the island might play against me, that with such an abundance of food and water and so much space he might become relaxed and confident, less open to my influence. But he remained tense. I knew him well enough to sense it. At night in the lifeboat he was unsettled and noisy. I assigned this tension to the new environment of the island; any change, even positive, will make an animal tense. Whatever the cause, the strain he was under meant that he continued to show a readiness to oblige; more, that he felt a need to oblige.
I trained him to jump through a
hoop185 I made with thin branches. It was a simple routine of four jumps. Each one earned him part of a meerkat. As he
lumbered186 towards me, I first held the hoop at the end of my left arm, some three feet off the ground. When he had leapt through it, and as he finished his run, I took hold of the hoop with my right hand and, my back to him, commanded him to return and leap through it again. For the third jump I knelt on the ground and held the hoop over my head. It was a nerve-racking experience to see him come my way. I never lost the fear that he would not jump but attack me. Thankfully, he jumped every time. After which I got up and tossed the hoop so that it rolled like a wheel. Richard Parker was supposed to follow it and go through it one last time before it fell over. He was never very good at this last part of the act, either because I failed to throw the hoop properly or because he clumsily ran into it. But at least he followed it, which meant he got away from me. He was always filled with
amazement187 when the hoop fell over. He would look at it intently, as if it were some great fellow animal he had been running with that had collapsed unexpectedly. He would stay next to it,
sniffing188 it. I would throw him his last treat and move away.
Eventually I quit the boat. It seemed absurd to spend my nights in such
cramped189 quarters with an animal who was becoming roomy in his needs, when I could have an entire island. I decided the safe thing to do would be to sleep in a tree. Richard Parker's nocturnal practice of sleeping in the lifeboat was never a law in my mind. It would not be a good idea for me to be outside my territory, sleeping and defenceless on the ground, the one time he decided to go for a midnight stroll.
So one day I left the boat with the net, a rope and some blankets. I sought out a handsome tree on the edge of the forest and threw the rope over the lowest branch. My fitness was such that I had no problem pulling myself up by my arms and climbing the tree. I found two solid branches that were level and close together, and I tied the net to them. I returned at the end of the day.
I had just finished folding the blankets to make my
mattress190 when I detected a
commotion191 among the meerkats. I looked. I pushed aside branches to see better. I looked in every direction and as far as the horizon. It was unmistakable. The meerkats were abandoning the ponds - indeed, the whole plain - and rapidly making for the forest. An entire nation of meerkats was on the move, their backs arched and their feet a
blur192. I was wondering what further surprise these animals held in store for me when I noticed with
consternation193 that the ones from the pond closest to me had surrounded my tree and were climbing up the trunk. The trunk was disappearing under a wave of determined meerkats. I thought they were coming to attack me, that here was the reason why Richard Parker slept in the lifeboat: during the day the meerkats were
docile194 and harmless, but at night, under their collective weight, they crushed their enemies ruthlessly. I was both afraid and indignant. To survive for so long in a lifeboat with a 450-pound Bengal tiger only to die up a tree at the hands of two-pound meerkats struck me as a tragedy too unfair and too ridiculous to bear.
They meant me no harm. They climbed up to me, over me, about me - and past me. They settled upon every branch in the tree. It became
laden195 with them. They even took over my bed. And the same as far as the eye could see. They were climbing every tree in sight. The entire forest was turning brown, an autumn that came in a few minutes. Collectively, as they
scampered196 by in droves to claim empty trees deeper into the forest, they made more noise than a stampeding
herd197 of elephants.
The plain, meanwhile, was becoming bare and depopulated.
From a
bunk198 bed with a tiger to an overcrowded dormitory with meerkats - will I be believed when I say that life can take the most surprising turns? I jostled with meerkats so that I could have a place in my own bed. They snuggled up to me. Not a square inch of space was left free.
They settled down and stopped squeaking and chirping. Silence came to the tree. We fell asleep.
I woke up at dawn covered from head to toe in a living fur blanket. Some meerkittens had discovered the warmer parts of my body. I had a tight, sweaty collar of them around my neck - and it must have been their mother who had settled herself so
contentedly199 on the side of my head - while others had wedged themselves in my groin area.
They left the tree as briskly and as unceremoniously as they had invaded it. It was the same with every tree around. The plain grew thick with meerkats, and the noises of their day started filling the air. The tree looked empty. And I felt empty, a little. I had liked the experience of sleeping with the meerkats.
I began to sleep in the tree every night. I emptied the lifeboat of useful items and made myself a nice treetop bedroom. I got used to the unintentional scratches I received from meerkats climbing over me. My only complaint would be that animals higher up occasionally relieved themselves on me.
One night the meerkats woke me up. They were
chattering200 and shaking. I sat up and looked in the direction they were looking. The sky was cloudless and the moon full. The land was robbed of its colour. Everything glowed strangely in shades of black, grey and white. It was the pond. Silver shapes were moving in it, emerging from below and breaking the black surface of the water.
Fish. Dead fish. They were floatimg up from deep down. The pond - remember, forty feet across - was filling up with all kinds of dead fish until its surface was no longer black but silver. And from the way the surface kept on being disturbed, it was evident that more dead fish were coming up.
By the time a dead shark quietly appeared, the meerkats were in a fury of excitement,
shrieking201 like tropical birds. The hysteria spread to the neighbouring trees. It was
deafening202. I wondered whether I was about to see the sight of fish being hauled up trees.
Not a single meerkat went down to the pond. None even made the first motions of going down. They did no more than loudly express their
frustration203.
I found the sight
sinister204. There was something disturbing about all those dead fish.
I lay down again and fought to go back to sleep over the meerkats' racket. At first light I was stirred from my
slumber205 by the hullabaloo they made trooping down the tree. Yawning and stretching, I looked down at the pond that had been the source of such fire and
fluster206 the previous night.
It was empty. Or nearly. But it wasn't the work of the meerkats. They were just now diving in to get what was left.
The fish had disappeared. I was confounded. Was I looking at the wrong pond? No, for sure it was that one. Was I certain it was not the meerkats that had emptied it? Absolutely. I could hardly see them heaving an entire shark out of water, let alone carrying it on their backs and disappearing with it. Could it be Richard Parker? Possibly in part, but not an entire pond in one night.
It was a complete mystery. No amount of staring into the pond and at its deep green walls could explain to me what had happened to the fish. The next night I looked, but no new fish came into the pond.
The answer to the mystery came sometime later, from deep within the forest.
The trees were larger in the centre of the forest and closely set. It remained clear below, there being no underbrush of any kind, but overhead the
canopy207 was so dense that the sky was quite blocked off, or, another way of putting it, the sky was solidly green. The trees were so near one another that their branches grew into each other's spaces; they touched and twisted around each other so that it was hard to tell where one tree ended and the next began. I
noted208 that they had clean, smooth trunks, with none of the
countless209 tiny marks on their bark made by climbing meerkats. I easily guessed the reason why: the meerkats could travel from one tree to another without the need to climb up and down. I found, as proof of this, many trees on the
perimeter210 of the heart of the forest whose bark had been practically
shredded211. These trees were without a doubt the gates into a meerkat
arboreal212 city with more
bustle213 in it than Calcutta.
It was here that I found the tree. It wasn't the largest in the forest, or in its dead centre, or remarkable in any other way. It had good level branches, that's all. It would have made an excellent spot from which to see the sky or take in the meerkats' nightlife.
I can tell you exacctly what day I came upon the tree: it was the day before I left the island.
I noticed the tree because it seemed to have fruit. Whereas elsewhere the forest canopy was uniformly green, these fruit stood out black against green. The branches holding them were twisted in odd ways. I looked intently. An entire island covered in barren trees but for one. And not even all of one. The fruit grew from only one small part of the tree. I thought that perhaps I had come upon the forest equivalent of a queen bee, and I wondered whether this algae would ever cease to amaze me with its botainical strangeness.
I wanted to try the fruit, but the tree was too high. So I returned with a rope. If the algae was delicious, what would its fruit be like?
I looped the rope; around the lowest limb of the tree and,
bough214 by bough, branch by branch, made my way to the small, preciouis
orchard215.
Up, close the fruit were dull green. They were about the size and shape of oranges. Each was at the centre of a number of
twigs216 that were tightly curled around it - to protect it, I supposed. As I got closer, I could see another purpose to these curled twigs: support. The fruit had not one stem, but dozens. Their surfaces were studded with stems that connected them to the surrounding twigs. These fruit must surely be heavy and juicy, I thought. I got close.
I reached with a hand and took hold of one. I was disappointed at how light it felt. It weighed hardly anything. I pulled at it, plucking it from all its stems.
I made myself comfortable on a sturdy branch, my back to the trunk of the tree. Above me stood a shifting roof of green leaves that let in
shafts217 of sunlight. All round, for as far as I could see, hanging in the air, were the twisting and turning roads of a great suspended city. A pleasant breeze ran through the trees. I was keenly curious. I examined the fruit.
Ah, how I wish that moment had never been! But for it I might have lived for years - why, for the rest of my life - on that island. Nothing, I thought, could ever push me to return to the lifeboat and to the suffering and
deprivation218 I had endured on it - nothing! What reason could I have to leave the island? Were my physical needs not met here? Was there not more fresh water than I could drink in all my lifetime? More algae than I could eat? And when I
yearned219 for variety, more meerkats and fish than I could ever desire? If the island floated and moved, might it not move in the right direction? Might it not turn out to be a vegetable ship that brought me to land? In the meantime, did I not have these
delightful220 meerkats to keep me company? And wastn't Richard Parker still in need of improving his fourth jump? The thought of leaving the island had not crossed my mind once since I had arrived. It had been many weeks now - I couldn't say how many exactly - and they would stretch on. I was certain about that.
How wrong I was.
If that fruit had a seed, it was the seed of my departure.
The fruit was not a fruit. It was a dense accumulation of leaves glued together in a ball. The dozens of stems were dozens of leaf stems. Each stem that I pulled caused a leaf to peel off.
After a few layers I came to leaves that had lost their stems and were flatly glued to the ball. I used my fingernails to catch their edges and pull them off. Sheath after sheath of leaf lifted, like the skins off an onion. I could simply have ripped the "fruit" apart - I still call it that for lack of a better word - but I chose to satisfy my curiosity in a measured way.
It shrunk from the size of an orange to that of a
mandarin221. My lap and the branches below were covered with thin, soft leaf peelings.
It was now the size of a rambutan.
I still get shivers in my spine when I think of it.
The size of a cherry.
And then it came to light, an unspeakable pearl at the heart of a green
oyster222.
A human tooth.
A molar, to be exact. The surface stained green and finely pierced with holes.
The feeling of horror came slowly. I had time to pick at the other fruit.
Each contained a tooth.
Another a premolar.
Here an incisor.
There another molar.
Thirty-two teeth. A complete human set. Not one tooth missing.
Understanding dawned upon me.
I did not scream. I think only in movies is horror
vocal224. I simply
shuddered225 and left the tree.
I spent the day in
turmoil226, weighing my options. They were all bad.
That night, in bed in my usual tree, I tested my conclusion. I took hold of a meerkat and dropped it from the branch.
It
squeaked227 as it fell through the air. When it touched the ground, it instantly made for the tree.
With typical
innocence228 it returned to the spot right next to me. There it began to lick its paws vigorously. It seemed much discomforted. It panted heavily.
I could have left it at that. But I wanted to know for myself. I climbed down and took hold of the rope. I had made knots in it to make my climbing easier. When I was at the bottom of the tree, I brought my feet to within an inch of the ground. I hesitated.
I let go.
At first I felt nothing. Suddenly a searing pain shot up through my feet. I
shrieked229. I thought I would fall over. I managed to take hold of the rope and pull myself off the ground. I
frantically230 rubbed the soles of my feet against the tree trunk. It helped, but not enough.
I climbed back to my branch. I soaked my feet in the bucket of water next to my bed. I wiped my feet with leaves. I took the knife and killed two meerkats and tried to
soothe231 the pain with their blood and innards. Still my feet burned. They burned all night. I couldn't sleep for it, and from the anxiety.
The island was carnivorous. This explained the
disappearance232 of the fish in the pond. The island attracted saltwater fish into its
subterranean233 tunnels - how, I don't know; perhaps fish ate the algae as
gluttonously234 as I did. They became trapped. Did they lose their way? Did the openings onto the sea close off? Did the water change
salinity235 so subtly that it was too late by the time the fish realized it? Whatever the case, they found themselves trapped in fresh water and died. Some floated up to the surface of the ponds, the
scraps236 that fed the meerkats. At night, by some chemical process unknown to me but obviously
inhibited237 by sunlight, the predatory algae turned highly acidic and the ponds became
vats238 of acid that digested the fish. This was why Richard Parker returned to the boat every night. This was why the meerkats slept in the trees. This was why I had never seen anything but algae on the island.
And this explained the teeth. Some poor lost soul had arrived on these terrible shores before me. How much time had he - or was it she? - spent here? Weeks? Months? Years? How many forlorn hours in the arboreal city with only meerkats for company? How many dreams of a happy life dashed? How much hope come to nothing? How much stored-up conversation that died unsaid? How much loneliness endured? How much hopelessness taken on? And after all that, what of it? What to show for it?
Nothing but some
enamel239, like small change in a pocket. The person must have died in the tree. Was it illness? Injury? Depression? How long does it take for a broken spirit to kill a body that has food, water and shelter? The trees were carnivorous too, but at a much lower level of
acidity240, safe enough to stay in for the night while the rest of the island
seethed241. But once the person had died and stopped moving, the tree must have slowly wrapped itself around the body and digested it, the very bones
leached24 of
nutrients242 until they vanished. In time, even the teeth would have disappeared.
I looked around at the algae. Bitterness welled up in me. The radiant promise it offered during the day was replaced in my heart by all the treachery it delivered at night.
I muttered, "Nothing but teeth left! Teeth!"
By the time morning came, my grim decision was taken. I preferred to set off and perish in search of my own kind than to live a lonely half-life of physical comfort and spiritual death on this murderous island. I filled my stores with fresh water and I drank like a camel. I ate algae throughout the day until my stomach could take no more. I killed and skinned as many meerkats as would fit in the locker and on the floor of the lifeboat. I reaped dead fish from the ponds. With the
hatchet243 I
hacked244 off a large mass of algae and worked a rope through it, which I tied to the boat.
I could not abandon Richard Parker. To leave him would mean to kill him. He would not survive the first night. Alone in my lifeboat at sunset I would know that he was burning alive. Or that he had thrown himself in the sea, where he would drown. I waited for his return. I knew he would not be late.
When he was aboard, I pushed us off. For a few hours the currents kept us near the island. The noises of the sea bothered me. And I was no longer used to the rocking motions of the boat. The night went by slowly.
In the morning the island was gone, as was the mass of algae we had been towing. As soon as night had fallen, the algae had dissolved the rope with its acid.
The sea was heavy, the sky grey.
第九十二章
我有了一个奇特的植物学发现。但是很多人都不会相信下面这一段。尽管如此,我仍然要把它告诉你,因为它是故事的一部分,而且它曾经发生在我身上。我侧身躺着。大约中午过后一两个小时吧,阳光静静地照着,微风轻轻地吹拂。我睡了一小会儿,睡得不沉,没休息好,也没做梦。我翻身转向另一侧,翻身时尽量少消耗一些能量。我睁开眼睛。我看见近处有树。我没有做出反应。那肯定是幻觉,眨几下眼睛,这景象就会消失不见了。树没有消失。事实上,树木变成了一片森林。那是一座低矮的小岛的一部分。我用力坐了起来。我还是不能相信自己的眼睛。但是被如此高质量地哄骗是一件令人激动的事。那些树很美。和我以前见过的所有树都不一样。树皮是浅色的,树枝均匀地四散伸出,树叶非常繁茂。这些树叶是鲜艳的绿色。这种绿色那么鲜亮,就像翡翠一般,相比之下,旁边季风季节里的其他植物都呈现出毫无光彩的橄榄色。我有意眨眨眼睛,希望自己的眼皮是伐木工。但是那些树却没有倒下。我向下看去。下面的景象让我既满意又失望。岛上没有土壤。树并不是长在水里,而是长在看上去像是浓密的植物丛中,这些植物就像树叶一样绿得发亮。谁听说过没有土壤的岛屿?树木完全从植物丛中生长出来?我感到满意,因为这样的地质情况证明我是对的,这座小岛确实是幻想,是大脑开的一个玩笑。同样的情况令我失望,因为能碰到一座岛屿,任何一座岛屿,无论多么奇怪,都是件好事。因为树还站在那儿,我也就接着看。看了这么多蓝色之后,现在看到了绿色,这对我的眼睛就像是音乐。绿色是一种可爱的颜色。它是伊斯兰教的颜色。是我最喜欢的颜色。潮流轻柔地将小船推向幻象。小岛的海岸不能叫做沙滩,因为那里既没有沙子也没有卵石,也没有海浪拍击的声响,因为浪花完全消失在植物的孔隙之中了。小岛沿着一道大约三百码长的山脊向下斜伸向大海,在伸进海里大约四十码后突然下降,消失在深深的太平洋中。这一定是历史记录中最小的一座大陆架。
我已经习惯大脑的错觉了。为了不让错觉消失,我不让自己对它有所指望;当小船轻轻靠上小岛时,我没有动,只是继续梦想。小岛似乎是由直径两指多一点儿的盘根错节、紧密缠绕的一堆管状海草组成的。多奇异的一座岛啊,我想。几分钟后,我爬上船舷。“寻找绿色。"这是求生指南上说的。好吧,这就是绿色。实际上,这是叶绿素的天堂。比食物颜色和闪烁的霓虹灯还要鲜亮的绿。令人沉醉的绿。“最终能对土地做出出色判断的是脚。”指南接着说。小岛就在脚能跨到的地方。是判断——然后失望——还是不判断,这是个问题。我决定判断。我向四周看看是否有鲨鱼。没有。我翻过身,肚子朝下,抓住油布,慢慢放下一条腿去。我的脚进到了海水里。海水很凉,很舒服。小岛就在不远处,在水中闪着微光。我伸长了身子。我想幻象的泡泡随时都会破灭的。幻象没有破灭。我的脚伸进了清澈的水里,踩到一个柔韧又结实的有弹性的东西。我踩得更重一些。幻象不愿让步。我把全身的体重都放到了脚上。我还是没有沉下去。我还是不能相信。最后,是我的鼻子对土地做出了判断。那气味飘进了我的鼻子,浓郁而清新,令人难以抗拒:那是植物的气味。我深深吸了一口气。几个月来我一直呼吸的是充满咸水味的空气,现在这浓烈的植物有机物质的气味让我陶醉了。直到那时我才相信,惟一变得衰弱的是我的大脑;我的思考过程变得支离破碎。我的腿开始颤抖。
“上帝啊!上帝啊!”我轻声低语。
我从船上掉了下来。
坚实的土地和清凉的水带给我巨大的震撼,让我有力气把自己拖上了小岛。我唠唠叨叨地语无伦次地对上帝说着感谢的话,然后便倒了下去。但我却无法安静地躺着。我太激动了。我试图站起来。血一下子从头上流走了。大地剧烈地摇晃起来。晕眩的感觉让我眼前一阵发黑。我想我要晕倒了。我稳住了自己。似乎我惟一能做的就是急促地喘息。我努力坐了起来。
“理查德·帕克!陆地!陆地!我们获救了!”我叫道。
植物的气味非常强烈。绿色那么清新,令人心旷神怡,力量与慰藉仿佛通过眼睛注入了我的身体。错综复杂地缠结在一起的奇怪的管状海草是什么东西?可以吃吗?这似乎是海洋藻类的一种,但相当坚硬,比普通藻类硬多了。抓在手里,感觉是潮湿的,很容易碎。我拽了一下。没用什么力气就拽断了几缕。海草的横截面上有两道同心壁:呈非常鲜明的绿色的外壁是潮湿的,有些粗糙,内壁在外壁和草芯之间。由内壁和外壁所形成的两根管子之间的分界非常明显:中间那根管子是白色的,而包裹在它外面的那根管子是绿色的,越接近内壁颜色越浅。我把一根海草放到鼻子下面。除了令人愉快的植物香气以外,它还有一种说不出来的气味。我舔了舔。我的脉搏变快了。海草里含有淡水。我咬了一口。这一咬让我吃了一惊。内管有一种苦涩的咸味——但外管不仅可以吃,而且味道好极了。我的舌头开始颤抖起来,就像手指在飞快地翻着字典,寻找着久已遗忘的单词。它找到了:甜蜜,我的眼睛听到这个词时愉快地闭上了。不是甜美的甜,而是甜糖的甜。海龟和鱼有很多滋味,但是它们从来、从来都不甜。这种海草有一种淡淡的甜味,甚至比我们加拿大的枫树汁更让人喜欢。要说硬度,最接近的只有荸荠了。大量唾液从干糊一样的嘴里涌了出来。我扯着身边的海草,发出快乐的叫喊声。内管和外管很容易就完全分开了。我开始把外管塞进嘴里。我两只手并用,使劲往嘴里塞,嘴开始用比这么久以来任何时候都更快的速度更用力地咀嚼着。我不停地吃,直到周围形成了一道不折不扣的壕沟。两百英尺以外有一棵树。那是山脊下坡惟一的一棵树,山脊看上去非常远。我用了山脊这个词;这个词可能会让人对山坡的坡度有一个错误的印象。小岛很低矮,这我已经说过了。山坡很平缓,高度大约有五六十英尺。但是对于我当时的处境,这个高度的山坡就像一座大山一样赫然耸立。那棵树更诱人。我注意到了那片树阴。我试图再站起来。我终于蹲了起来,但一开始站,我的头就开始晕,身体无法保持平衡。即使我没有倒下去,我的腿也没有一点儿力气了。但是我的意志非常坚强。我下定决心要向前走。我向前爬着,费力地移动着,虚弱地跳跃着来到了树前。当我爬进斑驳的闪着微光的树阴,听到风吹树叶发出的又干又脆的声音时,我知道自己再也不会体验到如此巨大的快乐了。这棵树没有内陆那些树高大茂盛,而且因为生长在山脊这一侧,更多地暴露在自然环境中,它有些矮小,不像其他树那样长得匀称。但它仍然是一棵树,当你在海上迷失了这么久以后,能看见一棵树,真是太好了。我歌唱那棵树的光荣,它从容不迫的绝对纯洁,它十分耐看的美丽外表。噢,要是我能像它一样,植根于大地,但每一只手都高高地举起,赞美上帝,那该多好!我哭了。就在我的心颂扬安拉的时候,我的大脑开始注意安拉的作品。那棵树的确是直接从海草丛中长出来的,就像我在救生艇上看到的那样。地上没有一丝土壤的痕迹。要不就是土在更深的地方,要不就是这棵树是一种奇妙的共生体,或者说寄生树。树干大约有人的胸脯那么宽。树皮是灰绿色的,又薄又滑,而且非常软,我能用指甲在上面留下划痕。心形的树叶大而阔,顶端悬尖的。树冠和芒果树一样,是浑圆的,非常可爱,但它不是芒果树。我觉得它闻上去像钝叶康达木,但又不是钝叶康达木。也不是红树。也不是我见过的其他任何树。我只知道它非常漂亮,是绿色的,枝叶繁茂。
我听见一声咆哮。我转过身。理查德.帕克正在救生艇上打量着我。他也在看着小岛。他似乎想上岸来,但又害怕。最后,吼叫了好几声,来回踱了好几次以后,他从船上跳了下来。我把橘红色哨子放到嘴边。但他并没有想袭击我。仅仅保持平衡已经很困难了,他像我一样两脚站立不稳。前进时,他四肢颤抖,紧贴着地面朝前爬,像一只刚出生的小虎崽。他与我保持着很长一段安全距离,向山脊跑去,消失在小岛的内陆深处。我吃东西,休息,试图站起来,总的来说,沉浸在极度快乐之中,就这样度过了一天。用力太猛时我会感到恶心。而且我一直感到脚下的地在摇晃,我要跌倒了,甚至在我一动不动地坐着时也是如此。
傍晚,我开始担心理查德·帕克。既然环境和地方都改变了,我不能肯定他碰到我时会做出怎样的反应。我不情愿地爬回到救生艇上,这完全是为了安全。无论理查德·帕克占据岛上多大的地方,船头和油布仍然是我的地盘。我寻找着能让救生艇停泊的地方。显然,海岸上覆盖了厚厚一层海藻,因为除了海藻我什么也没找到。最后,我把一支桨柄朝下深深地插进海藻丛里,再把船系在桨上,就这样解决了停船的问题。我爬到油布上。我已经筋疲力尽了。因为吃得太多,我的身体已经用尽了力气;因为运气突然改变,我的神经紧张起来。一天结束时,我模糊地记得听见理查德·帕克在远处咆哮的声音,但是浓浓睡意征服了我。夜里醒来时,我的下腹部有一种奇怪的不舒服的感觉。我以为是痉挛,可能是吃海藻中毒了。我听见了一声响声。我看了看。理查德·帕克在船上。他在我睡着时回来了。他正喵喵叫着,舔着脚掌。我觉得他回来很令人费解,但没再多想——很快痉挛变得更厉害了。我痛得蜷起身子,浑身发抖,这时一个对大多数人来说非常正常但我却久已忘记的过程开始了:排便。这非常痛苦,但在这之后我睡着了,那是我自从“齐姆楚姆”号沉没前一天晚上以来睡过的最沉、最令人精神振作的一觉。
早晨醒来时,我感到有力气多了。我充满活力地朝那棵惟一的树爬去。我的眼睛再一次尽情享受它的绿色,就像我的胃尽情享受海藻。我早饭吃得太多了,海藻丛被我挖了一个大洞。理查德·帕克又犹豫了好几个小时,才从船上跳下来。快到中午,他跳下来时,刚落到岸上,就立刻跳了回去,一半身体落进了水里,看上去非常紧张。他嘶嘶叫着,一只爪子在空中抓着。真是奇怪。我不知道他在做什么。焦虑过去了,他显然比前一天站得更稳,再一次消失在山脊那边。
那天,我靠着树站起来了。我感到头晕。让地面停止移动的惟一办法是闭上眼睛,紧紧抓着树。我把树推开,试图走几步,却立即摔倒了。我还没来得及移动一只脚,就猛地倒了下去。没有受伤。小岛覆盖着一层紧密缠绕在一起,像橡胶一样有弹性的植物,是一个重新学习走路的理想场所。我可以朝任何方向摔倒,却不可能伤了自己。
第二天,在船上——理查德·帕克又回到了船上——度过了又一个休息充分的夜晚之后,我能走路了。摔了几跤之后,我终于走到了树跟前。我能感到自己的力气每一小时都在增长。我举起鱼叉,从树上勾下一根树枝。栽摘下几片叶子。叶子软软的,叶面没有蜡质,但是很苦。理查德·帕克对救生艇上的窝恋恋不舍——这就是我对他晚上又回来的解释。那天傍晚,太阳落山时,我看见他回来。我把救生艇重新在埋在海藻丛里的桨上系好。当时我正在船头,检查缆绳是不是安全地系在桨柄上了。他突然出现了。刚开始我没认出他来。这只飞快从山脊上冲下来的健美的动物不可能是在不幸中与我做伴的那只没精打采的湿漉漉的老虎吧?但他确实是的。那是理查德·帕克,他正飞快地朝我跑来。他看上去坚定果断。他低着头,有力的脖颈高高耸起。每跑一步,他的毛皮和肌肉就晃动一下。我能听到他沉重的身体在地上跑过时发出的咚咚声。我在书上读到过,有两种恐惧即使经过训练也无法消除:突然听见意外的声音时吃惊的反应,还有眩晕。我还要加上第三种,那就是,看见我们知道的杀手迅速直接地逼近。我赶紧去摸哨子。在他离救生艇还有二十五英尺远时,我用尽全身力气吹响了哨子。尖厉的声音撕开了空气。哨声达到了预想的效果。理查德·帕克刹住了脚步。但是他显然想再向前跑。我第二次吹响了哨子。他开始转过身去,用一种非常古怪的,像鹿一样的动作在原地跳了起来,边跳边凶猛地吼叫着。我第三次吹响了哨子。他身上的每一根毛都竖了起来。他的爪子完全伸了出来。他正处在非常激动不安的状态之中。我害怕哨声形成的一道保护墙就要倒了,他就要袭击我了。他没有袭击我,却做了一件最出乎意料的事:他跳进了海里。我惊呆了。我以为他永远也不会做的事,他恰恰做了,而且果断有力。他有力地向船尾划去。我本想再吹哨子,但却打开柜子盖,坐了下来,退回到我那块地盘里面不受打扰的地方。他猛冲到船尾,大量的水从他身上流下来,把我在的船这头弄得向上翘。他在舷边和坐板上站了一会儿,打量着我。我的心都变衰弱了。我想我没有力气再吹哨子了。我茫然地看着他。他跳到船板上,消失在了油布下面。越过锁柜盖子的边缘,我能看见他的部分身体。我扑到油布上,他看不见我——但我就在他上面。我真想立刻生出翅膀来飞走。我平静了下来。我有力地提醒自己,这就是过去这么久以来我的处境,与一只老虎生活在一起,他就在我身体下面,带着体温。
我的呼吸慢了下来,睡意袭来。夜里某个时候,我醒了。这时我已忘记了害怕,朝老虎看过去。他正在做梦:他在睡梦中颤抖着,咆哮着,声音大得将我吵醒了。早上,和前几天一样,他越过了山脊那边。我决定,只要有了足够的力气,我立刻就去岛上勘察一番。这座岛似乎很大,如果海岸线能说明问题的话;海岸线向左右伸展,只有一处稍有弯曲,这说明岛的边缘很规则。那天我走几步便摔倒,爬起来又继续走,从岸边走到树跟前又走回去,努力想要让腿恢复健康。每次摔倒我都大吃一顿海藻。
一天快要结束时,理查德·帕克回来了,这次比前一天稍早了些。这时我已经在等着他了。我坐在那儿静观其变,没有吹哨子。他来到水边,用力一跳便跳到了救生艇边上。他进了自己的地盘,并没有侵入我的领地,只是让船突然向一边倾斜过去。他又恢复了以前的良好状态,这很可怕。第二天早上,我让理查德·帕克先离开,过了很长时间以后,我才出发去勘察小岛。我朝山脊走去。我自豪地迈着双脚,一步一步地向前走,步态虽然有些笨拙,却充满了活力,很容易就走到了。当我看见山脊那边的景象时,要是我的腿再虚弱些,一定会支持不住的。先从细带开始说吧。我看见整座岛屿都覆盖着海藻,而不仅仅是岸边如此。我看见一座绿色大高原,中央是一片绿色森林。我看见森林周围有几百座分布均匀,大小相同的池塘,池塘与池塘之间整齐地长着稀疏的树木,整个排列方式明显让人认为这是经过设计的。
但给我留下不可磨灭的印象的还是那些沼狸。我一眼看见成千上万只沼狸,这还是保守的估计。岛上到处都是沼狸。当我出现时,似乎所有的沼狸都惊讶地转身面对着我,并且直立起来,好像农场上的鸡。我们的动物园里没有沼狸。但是我在书上读到过。书上和文献里都有关于它们的记载。沼狸是南非一种小型哺乳动物,与獴有亲缘关系;换句话说,它们是一种会掘洞的食肉动物,身长一英尺,成年时体重两磅,体型细长,像鼬,鼻子尖,眼睛在脸正前方,腿短,脚有四趾,爪子不能缩回,尾巴有八英寸长。它的毛皮是浅棕色或灰色的,背上有黑色或棕色条纹,尾尖、耳朵和眼睛周围极具特色的圆圈是黑色的。沼狸是一种动作灵活、目光敏锐的动物,白天活动,喜欢群居,在原生长地——南部非洲的卡拉哈里沙漠——以包括蝎子在内的动物为食,对蝎子的毒液具有完全的免疫力。警觉时,沼狸有一个特点,喜欢靠后腿末端笔直地站立,用尾巴帮助保持平衡,两条腿和尾巴像三角架一样支撑着身体。通常一群沼狸会集体做出这样的姿势,它们聚在一起站着,朝一个方向看,看上去就像上下班的人在等公交车。它们脸上庄重的表情和前爪放在身体前面的样子使它们看上去就像在摄像师面前忸忸怩怩摆姿势照相的孩子,或是医生诊室里脱光了衣服,假装害羞地捂住生殖器的病人。这就是我一次所看见的,成千上万只——比这还多,上百万只——沼狸朝我转过身来,立正站着,好像在说:“什么,先生?”你要知道,站着的沼狸最多能达到十八英寸高,因此并不是这些动物的身高,而是它们的数不清的数量太令人吃惊了。我站在原地一步也动不了,一句话也说不出。如果我让一百万只沼狸惊恐地逃开,那混乱场面一定难以描述。但是它们对我的兴趣很快就过去了。几秒钟后,它们又回去做我出现之前正在做的事,那就是啃海藻,看池塘。看到这么多生物同时弯下身去,让我想起了清真寺里祈祷时的情景。这些动物似乎没有感到任何恐惧。我从山脊上下去时,没有一只因为害怕而躲开,或者在我面前表现出一丁点儿紧张。只要我想,我完全可以去摸一只沼狸,或者抱起来一只。我没有这么做。我只是走进一定是世界上最大的沼狸群中,这是我一生中最奇异、最奇妙的一次体验。空中的叫声不绝于耳。是它们在吱吱吱、唧唧唧、喳喳喳、汪汪汪地叫。它们数量如此之多,兴奋的情绪如此奇特,一阵阵的叫声就像一群鸟飞来又飞去,有时叫声很高,就在我身边盘旋,接着在最近的一只沼狸停止叫唤后平息了下去,而远处的其他沼狸又开始叫了起来。它们不怕我,是因为我应该怕它们吗?这个问题从我脑中闪过。但是答案——即它们不会伤害我——立即变得很清楚。沼狸密密麻麻地聚在池塘周围,要到池塘边去,我不得不用脚把它们推开,这样才不至于踩到它们。它们对我鲁莽地向前冲没有丝毫的反感,像好脾气的人群一样为我让开一条道。我朝池塘里面看时,能感到脚踝上紧贴着温暖的有毛的身体。
所有的池塘都是圆形的,而且都同样大小——直径大约四十英尺。我以为池塘很浅,却看见了深深的、清澈的池水。实际上,池塘似乎深不见底。直到我能看得见的深处,池壁都是绿色的海藻组成的。显然,覆盖在小岛表面的一层海藻很厚。我看不见任何能引起沼狸不变的好奇心的东西,要不是附近一座池塘边突然爆发出吱吱的叫声和吠声,我可能就不再继续寻找谜题的答案了。沼狸们异常激动地跳上跳下。突然,几百只沼狸开始潜进池水里。后面的沼狸争抢着往池塘边跑,所有沼狸都在推推搡搡。这是集体疯狂;甚至小小的沼狸幼崽也在往水边跑,它们的妈妈和守护者几乎抓不住它们。我目不转睛地看着,简直不敢相信自己的眼睛。这些沼狸不是普通的卡拉哈里沙漠沼狸。普通的卡拉哈里沙漠沼狸没有像青蛙一样的行为。这些沼狸一定是一个亚种,擅长如此有趣的令人惊讶的行为方式。我轻手轻脚地朝池塘走去,刚好来得及目睹沼狸在游泳——真的是在游泳——一边把许多鱼抓上岸来,抓上来的还不是小鱼。其中有几条是蜞鳅,这种鱼在船上绝对会是一顿盛宴。它们比沼狸大得多。我不能理解沼狸怎么能抓住这么大的鱼。
就在沼狸把鱼从池塘里拖出来,表现出真正的团队合作技巧的时候,我注意到了一件奇怪的事:所有鱼毫无例外地都已经死了。是刚刚死的。沼狸正把并非它们杀死的鱼拖到岸上。我在池塘边跪下来,把几只兴奋的湿漉漉的沼狸拨到一边。我碰了碰池水。水比我估计的要凉。有一道水流在把冷一些的水从底下带上来。我用手捧起一捧水放到嘴边,呷了一口。是淡水。这解释了为什么鱼会死——当然,把一条咸水鱼放在淡水里,它会被腌得肿起来,然后死去。但是生活在海里的鱼在淡水里来干什么呢?它们是怎么来的呢?我从沼狸中间穿过,来到另一座池塘边。这里的池水也是淡水。再去另一座池塘;情况一样。第四座池塘也是一样。这些都是淡水池塘。这么多淡水是从哪里来的呢,我问自己。答案很明显:从海藻来。海藻自然地、持续不断地将海水脱盐,这就是为什么它里面是咸的而表面却有淡水的原因:淡水正从里面渗出来。我没有问自己海藻为什么要这么做,怎么做,或者盐水到哪里去了。我的大脑已经不再问这样的问题。我只是大笑起来,跳进了池塘里。我发现自己很难浮在水面上;我还很虚弱,没有足够的脂肪让自己浮起来。我抓住池塘边。在纯净、清洁、没有盐分的水里洗澡,这种感觉无法用语言表达。在海上漂流了这么长时间,我的皮肤已经变得像一层厚厚的兽皮,我的头发又长又乱,其油亮的程度简直可以和捕蝇带相媲美。我感到甚至灵魂都被盐腐蚀了。于是,在一千只沼狸的注视下,我将自己浸泡在水中,让淡水将污染我的每一粒盐晶体都融化掉。
沼狸转过脸去。它们行动一致,在同一时间转向同一个方向。我从水里出来看看发生了什么事。是理查德·帕克。他证实了我的怀疑,那就是这些沼狸世世代代都没有见过食肉动物,因此有关安全距离、逃跑、单纯的恐惧的所有概念已经在基因遗传中被淘汰了。他从沼狸群中跑过,吞下一只又一只沼狸,鲜血从他嘴边滴了下来,他身后留下一道谋杀与暴力的痕迹,而这些沼狸们,和老虎脸贴脸,却在原地跳上跳下,仿佛在说:“该我了!该我了!该我了!”以后我还会一次又一次地看见这样的情景。这些沼狸的生活中只有看池塘和啃海藻这两件事,什么都不能分散它们做这两件事的注意力。无论理查德·帕克在大吼一声扑上击之前用老虎的精湛技艺悄悄接近,还是满不在乎地没精打采地走过,对它们来说都一样。它们不会受打扰。温顺的天性占了上风。
他杀死的沼狸超过了自己的需要。他杀死它们,却并不吃。在动物身上,猎杀的强烈欲望和吃的欲望是截然分开的。这么长时间没有猎物,而现在又突然有了这么多猎物————他被压抑本能猛烈地释放了出来。他离我很远,对我没有危险。至少现在没有。第二天早上,他走了之后,我把救生艇打扫了一遍。这太有必要了。船上堆满了人和动物的骨架,还有数不清的吃剩下的鱼和海龟,那副景象我就不描述了。那堆散发着恶臭的令人恶心的东西全都被我扔到海里去了。我不敢到船板上去,害怕给理查德·帕克留下我来过的明显痕迹,因此我只能站在水里,用鱼叉把这些东西从油布上或船舷上捅下去.。鱼叉无法清除的东西——臭气和污迹——被我用一桶桶水冲洗掉了。那天晚上,他走进干净的新窝,并没有什么反应。他爪子里抓着好几只沼狸,这些沼狸都被他在夜里吃掉了。在接下来的几天里,我整天吃喝,洗澡,观察沼狸,走走,跳跳,休息休息,让自己变得更加强壮起来。我跑起来更加平稳自然,这使我的心情愉快极了。我的皮肤痊愈了。疼痛消失了。简单地说,我恢复了活力。
我在岛上勘察了一番。我想要沿岛走一圈,但放弃了。我估计小岛的直径有六七英里,也就是说周长大约有二十英里。我所看见的景象似乎说明海岸的地形特征没有变化。到处是令人目眩的绿色,到处是同样的山脊,同样的从山脊伸向海里的斜坡,同样的零星分布的稀疏树木打破了单调。在勘察海岸之后,我发现了一件不同寻常的事:海藻的高度和密度是随天气变化而变化的,因而小岛本身的高度和密度也随天气变化而变化。在非常炎热的天气里,海藻缠结得更紧更密,小岛变高,山脊更高,爬上去更陡。这不是一个迅速变化的过程。只有持续好几天的炎热天气才能引起这一变化。但变化肯定发生了。我相信这是为了蓄水,也是为了海藻表面少暴露在阳光下面。
相反的现象——小岛变得松弛——发生得更快,更突然,原因也更明显。在这样的时候,山脊下降,所谓的大陆架伸得更远,沿岸的海藻变得非常松弛,我往往会把脚陷进去。在阴云密布的天气里,这种现象就会发生,波涛汹涌的海水让这一现象发生得更快。
在岛上,我经历了一次大风暴,在这次经历之后,我可以放心地在最糟糕的飓风天气里待在岛上了。坐在树上,看巨浪朝岛上冲来,似乎要冲上山脊,带来一片喧闹与混乱——这时却看见每一个浪头都退了回去,仿佛遇上了流沙。这真是令人敬畏的奇观。在这方面,这座小岛倒挺有甘地精神——它用不抵抗来进行抵抗。每一朵浪花都消失在了岛上,没有发出一声撞击声,只激起了一点点泡沫。只有让大地摇晃的一阵震颤和让池塘水面荡起波纹的几圈涟游表明有某种巨大的力量正在通过。这一力量的确是通过了:在小岛的背风处,力量大大减弱的海浪涌了出来,流走了。看见海浪离开海岸线,这是一种最奇怪的景象。风暴及其造成的小地震没有让沼狸感到丝毫的不安。它们继续做着自己的事,仿佛周围环境并不存在。
更让人难以理解的是,小岛竟如此荒凉。我从没有见过如此单一的生态环境。这个地方的空中没有苍蝇,没有蝴蝶,没有蜜蜂,没有任何昆虫。树上没有一只鸟。平原上没有啮齿动物,没有昆虫的幼虫,没有蠕虫,没有蛇,没有蝎子;岛上没有任何其他树,没有灌木,没有草.没有花。池塘里没有淡水鱼。海岸不长草,没有螃蟹、螯虾、珊瑚,也没有卵石或岩石。除了沼狸这一惟一的、显著的例外,岛上没有任何外来的东西,无论是有机体还是无机体。岛上除了绿得炫目的海藻和绿得炫目的树,什么都没有。这些树不是寄生树。有一天,我吃了一棵小树树根处的很多海藻,树根都露出来了,我才发现了这一点。我看见树根并不伸进海藻丛中的独立的根须,而是与海藻连接在一起,成了海藻的一部分。这就意味着这些树与海藻是共生关系,一种互利的相互给予的关系,或者,更简单,这些树就是海藻的不可分割的一部分。我猜是后者,因为这些树似乎不开花也不结果。一个独立的有机体,无论它有怎样亲密的共生关系,我都怀疑它是否会放弃繁殖这一生命中如此重要的部分。树叶繁茂,叶片宽大,因为叶绿素丰富而有着碧绿的颜色,这一切说明树叶喜好阳光,而这使我怀疑这些树首先有搜集能量的功能。但这只是猜测。我还要提出一个看法。这是建立在直觉而不是确凿证据的基础之上的。这就是:这座小岛不是传统意义上的岛屿——即固定在大洋底部的小陆块——而是一个自由漂浮的有机体,一个体积巨大的海藻球。我隐约感觉到,那些池塘向下伸到这堆巨大的漂浮的海藻的侧面,通向海洋,否则无法解释为什么生活在外海的鲼鳅和其他鱼会出现在池塘里。这个看法还需要经过进一步研究才能证实,但不幸的是,我弄丢了带走的海藻。
我恢复了生气,理查德·帕克也一样。因为饱餐了沼狸的缘故,他的体重上升了,他的毛皮又开始有了光泽,他又恢复了以前健康的模样。他一直保留着晚上回救生艇的习惯。我总是确保自己在他之前回去,用大量的尿液标志出我的地盘,这样他就不会忘记谁是谁,什么东西是谁的。但是,天一亮,他就离开了,比我漫游得更远;因为小岛上到处都一样,通常我只待在一个地方。白天我很少看见他。我变得紧张起来。我看见他用前爪在树上抓过的痕迹——树干上留下的抓痕很深,真的。我开始听见他粗哑的咆哮声,嗷——嗷的叫声圆润而洪亮,像一座不安全的深深的矿井或者一千只愤怒的蜜蜂一样让人脊背发凉。他在寻找一只雌虎,这件事本身并没有让我不安;这意味着他在岛上很舒服,已经在考虑繁殖后代了,这才是让我不安的事。我担心,在新的条件下,他可能不会容忍在他的地盘上有另一只雄性动物存在,特别是在他夜间的地盘上,尤其是当他不断吼叫却得不到回答的时候,而他的吼叫肯定得不到回答。
一天,我正在森林里散步。我充满活力地走着,沉溺在自己的思考中。我从一棵树下经过——几乎撞上了理查德·帕克。我们俩都吃厂一惊。他发出嘶嘶声,后腿直立,高高地站在我面前,巨大的脚掌随时准备把我击倒在地。我一下子僵住了,恐惧和震惊让我无法动弹。他四肢落地,走开了。走了三四步后,他转过身来,又直立了起来,这次还发出了咆哮声。我继续像一尊雕像一样站在那里。他又走了几步,然后第三次重复了威胁的动作。看到我并不构成威胁,他感到满意,慢慢走开了。我刚喘过气来,不再颤抖,就立即把哨子放进嘴里,开始去追他。他已经走了很远一段距离,但我仍然能看见他。我跑得十分有力。他转过身来,看见我,蹲下身来——然后蹿了过来。我用最大的力气吹响哨子,希望哨音能和一只孤独的老虎的叫声传得一样远,传到的范围一样广。
那天夜里,他在我下面两英尺的地方休息的时候,我得出了结论.应该开始马戏训练了。训练动物的最大困难在于,动物是靠本能或死记硬背来完成动作的。不依靠本能而在动物头脑中建立新的联系,这种走捷径的可能性极小。因此,要让动物牢记人为规定的某种动作,比如打滚和奖赏之间的联系,只能通过让大脑麻木的不断重复。这是一个缓慢的过程,既取决于运气,也取决于刻苦训练,尤其是当动物已经成年的时候。我吹哨子吹得肺都疼了。我捶胸捶得胸口满是伤痕。我叫了几千遍“嗨!嗨!嗨!”——这是我用来命令老虎的语言,意思是“跳!”我扔给他几百片沼狸肉,要是我自己能吃掉这些肉,我会很高兴的。训练老虎可不是什么简单的技艺。他们的大脑远不如马戏团和动物园里通常训练的其他动物——例如海狮和黑猩猩——那么灵活。但是,对于我训练理查德·帕克所取得的成果,我不想过于居功。他不仅是一只年轻的成年老虎,而且是一只顺从的年轻成年老虎,一只地位最低的老虎。这是我的好运气,这好运气救了我的命。我害怕岛上的条件对我不利,这里有如此丰富的食物和水,有如此广阔的空间,也许他会放松,会变得自信,不再那么容易接受我的影响。但是他一直很紧张。我太了解他了,能够感觉到这一点。夜晚,在救生艇上,他不安宁也不安静。我把他的紧张归因于岛上的新环境:任何改变,哪怕是积极的改变,都会让动物紧张。无论是什么原因,他感到紧张,这意味着他还愿意听话;不仅如此,他感到有必要听话。
我用细树枝做了一个环,训练他从环里跳过去。这是简单的四级跳固定节目。每跳一次,他都能赢得几块沼狸肉作为奖赏。当他笨拙地朝我跑来时,我先伸直左臂拿着环,环离地面大约三英尺。他跳过去,停止跑动之后,我用右手拿着坏,背对着他,命令他转过身来再跳一次。跳第三次时,我跪在地上,把环放在头顶上方。看着他朝我跑过来是一种刺激神经的体验。也许他不去跳,却袭击我,我从未战胜过这样的恐惧。幸运的是,每次他都跳了。然后我站起来,把环抛起来,让它像轮子一样转动。理查德·帕克应该跟着环跑,在它落地之前最后一次跳过去。最后这部分动作他总是做不好,不是因为我没能把环抛好,就是因为他笨拙地撞了上去。但至少他跟着环跑了,也就是说他离开了我。每次环掉在地上时他都感到很惊奇。他目不转睛地看着它,好像那是和他一起跑的某种庞大动物,出乎意料地倒了下去。他会站在环旁边;不停地嗅。我会把最后一块奖赏扔给他,然后走开。
最后,我离开了小船。我完全可以拥有整座小岛,却与一只动物待在如此狭窄的住处,而且它需要越来越大的地方,这看上去很荒唐。我决定,睡在树上是安全的。理查德·帕克夜间在救生艇上睡觉的习惯在我心里从来不是一个必须遵守的规则。要是哪一次他决定在午夜去散步,而我却在自己的领地之外,毫无防备地在地上睡着了,这可不是个好主意。
于是,有一天,我带着网、一根缆绳和几条毯子离开了小船。我在森林边上选中了一棵漂亮的树,把缆绳扔上最矮的树枝。我现在已经相当健康,用胳膊拉住绳子往树上爬没有任何问题。找到两根靠在一起的平伸的结实的树枝,把网系在上面。一天结束时,我回到了树上。我刚卷起毯子,做了一个床垫,就觉察到沼猩群中一阵骚动。我看了看。我把树枝拨开,好看得更仔细些。我环顾四周,尽力远眺。没错。沼狸正离开池塘——实际上,是在离开整个平原——并迅速向森林跑来。整个沼狸国都在搬迁,一个个弓着背,脚爪奔跑着,动作迅速得让人难以看清。我正在想这些动物还能给我带来怎样的惊奇,这时,我惊恐地发现,从离我最近的池塘跑来的沼狸已经把我的树包围了,正沿着树干爬上来。树干正在浪潮般涌来的下定决心的沼狸群中消失。我以为它们要来袭击我,以为这就是理查德·帕克在救生艇上睡觉的原因:白天沼狸是温顺无害的,但是晚上,它们会用集体的重量把敌人压碎。我既害怕又愤怒。和一只450磅重的孟加拉虎一起在救生艇里活了这么长时间,却在树上死于两磅重的沼狸之手,这个悲剧太不公平,太荒唐,让我无法忍受。它们并不想伤害我。它们爬到我身上,从我身上爬过,在我身边爬——从我身边爬过。每一根树枝上都蹲着沼狸。整棵树上挤满了沼狸。它们甚至占据了我的床。在我的视野之内,情况都一样。它们在爬我所能看得见的每一棵树。整个森林都变成了棕色,仿佛在几分钟之内秋天突然来临了。它们成群结队急匆匆朝森林更深处还空着的树奔去,发出的声音比一群受了惊而奔跑的大象发出的声音还要大。同时,平原变得光秃秃的,一片荒凉。从与老虎同眠的双层床,到与沼狸共处的过于拥挤的宿舍——如果我说生活可能发生最令人惊讶的转变,会有人相信吗?我与沼狸挤,好在自己的床上有一个位置。它们紧紧偎依着我。没有一平方英寸的地方是空的。它们安顿下来,不再吱吱唧唧地叫。树上安静下来。我们睡着了。
黎明,我醒来时,身上从头到脚盖了一条活的毛毯。有几只小沼狸发现了我身上更温暖些的地方。我脖子上紧紧围着满是汗的领子——在我头旁边如此心满意足地安顿下来的一定是它们的妈妈——另几只则挤在我腹股沟那里。和侵占树时一样,它们又迅速地不拘礼节地离开了树。周围每棵树都一样。平原上挤满了沼狸,空气中开始充满它们白夭的叫声。树看上去空荡荡的。我心里也感到有些空荡荡的。我喜欢和沼狸一起睡觉的经历。
我开始每天晚上都在树上过夜。‘我把救生艇上有用的东西都拿来,在树顶为自己搭了一间可爱的卧室。我习惯了沼狸从我身上爬过时不是故意的抓挠。我惟一的不满是上面的动物偶尔会排泄在我身上。
一天夜里,沼狸把我吵醒了。它们吱吱叫着,身体在发抖。我坐起来,朝它们看的方向望去。天上没有一丝云彩,一轮满月挂在天空。大地失去了色彩。一切都在黑色、灰色和白色的阴影里奇怪地闪着微光。是池塘。银色的影子正在池塘里移动,它们从下面出现,打碎了黑色的水面。鱼。死鱼。正从水下浮到水面上来。池塘——记住,池塘有四十英尺宽——正渐渐挤满各种各样的死鱼,直到水面不再是黑色,而成了银色。水面仍在继续骚动,显然更多的死鱼还在浮上来。这时一条死鲨鱼静静地出现了,沼狸激动异常,像热带鸟类一样尖声叫喊。歇斯底里的情绪传到了邻近的树上。叫声震耳欲聋。我不知道是否即将看见鱼被拖到树上的情景。没有一只沼狸下树到池塘去。甚至没有做出准备下树的动作。它们只是大声表达着自己的失望。我觉得这是一个邪恶的景象。所有这些死鱼身上有些什么东西令我感到不安。我又躺下来,努力在沼狸的吵闹声中再次入睡。天刚亮,我就被沼狸成群结队下树的喧闹声吵醒了。我边打哈欠伸懒腰,边往下看昨天夜里引起如此激情和紧张不安的池塘。池塘是空的。或者几乎是空的。但不是沼狸干的。它们刚开始潜进水里去抓剩下的鱼。鱼消失了。我惊讶得目瞪口呆。我看的不是那座池塘吗?不,肯定就是那座池塘。我能肯定不是沼狸把鱼吃光了吗?完全可以肯定。我几乎看不到它们把一整条鲨鱼从池塘里拖出来,更不用说把鱼背在背上,然后消失不见了。会是埋查德.帕克吗?也许有一部分是他吃掉的,但他不会一夜吃完整个池塘的鱼。这完全是个谜。无论我盯着池塘和深深的绿色的池壁看多少次,都无法解释这些鱼出了什么事。第二天夜里我又去看,但是没有新的鱼到池塘里来。
谜题的答案是后来才出现的,是在森林深处出现的。
森林中央的树更加高大一些,一棵挨着一棵。树下还是很清爽,没有任何林下灌木丛,而头顶的树冠却如此茂密,天空几乎被遮住了,或者,换句话说,天空是纯绿色的。一棵棵树挨得太近了,树枝相互交错,相互碰触,相互缠绕,很难分清一棵树的树枝伸到哪里为止,另一棵树的树枝又是从哪里开始的。我注意到树干干净平滑,树皮上没有沼狸爬树时留下的数不清的细小爪印。我很容易就猜出了为什么:沼狸不需要爬上爬下就能从一棵树到另一棵树。我发现,位于森林中心的边缘的许多树的树皮都差不多被撕碎了,这证实了我的猜测。毫无疑问,这些树是通向沼狸生活的树木城市的大门,这座城市比加尔各答更加繁忙。
我就是在这儿发现那棵树的。它不是森林中最大的一棵树,也不是森林正中心最大的一棵,也没有任何其他与众不同之处。它有漂亮的平伸的树枝,仅此而已。会是一个看天和观察沼狸在夜间的生活的好地方。
我可以确切地告诉你,我是哪一天碰到了那棵树:就是我离开小岛的前一天。
我注意到那棵树是因为那上面似乎有果子。在其他地方,森林里的树冠一律是绿色的,而这些果子却是黑色的,很引人注目。挂着果子的树枝奇怪地盘绕着。我目不转睛地看着。整座岛上的树都不结果子,只有这一棵例外。而且甚至不是整棵树都如此。只有树的一小部分长出了果子。我想也许我碰到了森林中地位相当于蜂王的树,我不知道这海藻是否会有一天不再用它的植物学上的奇异现象令我惊奇。我想尝尝果子,但是树太高了。于是我回去拿来一根缆绳。海藻味道很好,果子的味道会如何呢?把缆绳打成环,扣在最低的主枝上,然后踩着一根根大树枝,一根根分树枝,朝那座小小的珍贵的果园爬去。靠近了看,这些果子是暗绿色的。大小和形状都像甜橙。每只果子周围都有许多细枝紧紧缠绕着——是为了保护果子吧,我想。再靠近些,我能看到这些缠绕的细枝的另一个目的了:为了支撑果子。果子不只有一根梗子,而是有很多根。果子表面密布着细枝,这些细枝将果子与环绕在周围的细枝连在一起。这些果子一定很重而且鲜美多汁,我想。我靠近了。我伸手摘了一只。果子太轻了,令我失望。几乎轻若无物。我用力扯了一下,把所有的梗子都拔了下来。我在一根粗壮的树枝上舒舒服服地躺下来,背对着树干。在我头顶上足绿叶搭成的不断移动的屋顶,一道道阳光从叶缝间照射下来。在我所能看得到的地方,四周悬挂在空中的,是这座了不起的悬浮城市的盘绕旋转的道路。令人愉快的微风在树丛间吹拂。我很好奇。我仔细看了看果子。啊,我多希望从来没有过那一刻啊!如果没有那一刻,我也许会在岛上住很多年。晦,也许我下半辈子就住在那儿了。我想,没有什么能够把我推回到救生艇上,推回到我在那上面忍受过的痛苦和匮乏中去,什么也不能!我会有什么理由要离开这座小岛呢?难道我的身体需要没有在这里得到满足吗?难道这里没有我一辈子都喝不完的淡水吗?还有我吃不过多的海藻?当我渴望变化的时候,难道这里没有比我想要的还要多的沼狸和鱼吗?如果小岛在漂动,在移动,它不是也可能朝着正确的方向移动吗?它不是可能最后成为把我带上陆地的一艘植物船吗?同时,难道我没有这些令人愉快的沼狸做伴吗?难道理查德·帕克不需要把第四跳练习得更加完美吗?自从来到岛上,离开的念头从没有在我脑中闪过。我已经在岛上待了好几个星期了,我说不出具体有几个星期,而且我还可以继续待下去。这一点我很肯定。我大错特错了。如果那只果子有种子,那便是播下的一粒导致我离开的种子。那并不是一只果子,而是由许多树叶黏在一起形成的一只球。那许多果梗其实是许多叶梗。每拽下一根叶梗,便有一片叶子剥落下来。剥了几层以后,我看见里面的叶子已经没有了梗子,平平地黏在球上。我用指甲抓住叶片边缘,把叶子扯了下来。一片一片的叶子外皮被揭开,就像剥开一层又一层的洋葱皮。我完全可以把“果子”撕开——我仍然把它叫做果子,因为找不到更恰当的词。但我选择慢慢地满足自己的好奇心。果子变小了,从一只甜橙那么大,变得像一只柑橘那么大。我腿上和下面的树枝上满是剥下来的薄薄的软软的树叶。现在只有红毛丹那么大了。现在想起来我的脊椎骨都会打寒颤。只有樱桃那么大了。然后,里面的东西露了出来,那是一只绿色杜蛎中的一颗无法用语言形容的珍珠。一颗人类的牙齿。确切地说,是一颗臼齿。牙齿表面染成了绿色,上面满是细小的孔洞。恐惧的感觉慢慢袭来。我还有时间扯开其他果子。每一只里面都有一颗牙齿。一只里面是犬齿。另一只里面是前臼齿。这儿是一颗门齿。那儿是另一颗臼齿。三十二颗牙齿。一副完整的人类牙齿。一颗不少。我恍然大悟。我没有尖叫。我想只有电影里的人才在恐惧时叫出声来。我只是打了个颤,从树上下来了。那一天,我权衡着各种选择,心乱如麻。所有的选择都很糟糕。
那天夜里,我躺在通常过夜的那棵树上,检验了自己的结论。我抓住一只沼狸,把它从树枝上扔了下去。它掉下去时吱吱叫着。刚掉到地上,它就立即朝树上跑来。因为沼狸特有的无知,它又回到了我旁边的地方。它开始舔自己的爪子。它看上去非常不舒服,重重地喘着粗气。我本来可以到此为止,但我想自己试一试。我爬下去,抓住了缆绳。我在缆绳上打了结,这样爬起来容易一些。到了树底部,我把脚放到离地面一英寸的地方。我犹豫了。我松开手。刚开始我没觉得什么。突然,一阵灼痛从双脚直蹿上来。我尖叫起来。我以为自己要倒下去了。我设法抓住绳子,让自己离开了地面。我发疯般的在树干上摩擦着脚底心。这有点儿用,但还不够。我爬回到树枝上,把脚浸泡在床边那桶水里,又用树叶擦脚。我拿出刀来,杀死两只沼狸,试图用它们的血和内脏缓解疼痛。但是脚仍然感到灼痛。一夜都在痛。因为痛,也因为焦虑,我一夜没睡。
这座岛是食肉的。这就解释了为什么池塘里的鱼会消失。小岛将咸水鱼吸引到地下管道里来——如何吸引,我不知道;也许鱼像我一样吃了太多的海藻。它们被困住了。它们迷了路吗?通向大海的出口被堵住了吗?是不是水在不知不觉中改变了盐碱度,当鱼觉察到的时候已经太晚了?不管是哪一种情况,它们发觉自己被困在了淡水里,死去了。一些鱼浮到了池塘水面上,碎鱼肉为沼狸提供了食物。夜里,通过某种我不了解,但显然被阳光抑制了的化学过程,食肉海藻的酸性变得很高,池塘成了装满酸的大缸,把鱼消化掉了。这就是理查德·帕克每天晚上都回到船上的原因。这就是沼狸睡在树上的原因。这就是我在这座岛上除了海藻什么都没有看见过的原因。
这也解释了为什么会有牙齿。某个可怜的迷失的灵魂在我之前来过这可怕的海岸。他?还是她?在这里待了多长时间?几个星期?几个月?几年?在这座树木的城市里,只有沼狸做伴,孤苦伶仃地过了几个小时?有多少关于幸福生活的梦想破碎了?有多少希望变成了泡影?有多少埋藏在心里的话直到死都没有说出口?忍受过多少孤独?产生过多少希望?而在所有这一切之后,又怎样?忍受所有这些痛苦的意义何在?除了像口袋里的零钱的珐琅质,什么也没有。那个人一定死在了树上。是因为疾病?受伤?沮丧?破碎的灵魂要杀死有食物、水和蔽身之处的身体,需要多长时间?这些树也是食肉的,但是酸水平低得多,在小岛其他地方都胃着泡的时候,树上是个可以安全过夜的地方。但是一旦人死了,停止了活动,树就会慢慢将尸体包裹起来,消化掉,滤取骨头里的营养,直到骨头消失。最后,甚至牙齿也会消失。我环顾四周的海藻。一阵苦涩涌上心头。在我心里,这些海藻在白天所展示的光明前景已经被它们在夜晚的背叛所取代。我低声咕哝道:“只剩下牙齿了!牙齿!”早晨,我下定了决心。我要出发去寻找自己的同类,我宁愿在这一过程中丧身,也不愿在这座杀人的岛上过孤独的令人不满意的生活,虽然身体舒服,精神却已死亡。我在船上备足了淡水,还像骆驼一样喝足了水。一整天我都在吃海藻,一直吃到肚子再也撑不下为止。我杀了很多沼狸,剥了皮,把柜子塞得满满的,把船板也堆得满满的。我从池塘里捞上来很多死鱼。我用斧子砍下一大堆海藻,用一根缆绳穿起来,系在船上。
我不能抛弃理查德·帕克。离开他就意味着杀死他。他连第一夜都活不过去。日落时,独自在船上,我会知道他正被活活烧死。或者他跳进了海里,那他就会淹死。我等着他回来。我知道他不会迟到的。他上船后,我把船推下了水。有几个小时,潮流让我们无法远离小岛。大海的声音令我不安。而且我已经不能适应船的晃动了。夜晚过去得很慢。早晨,小岛已经看不见了,我们拖着的那堆海藻也不见了。夜幕刚刚降临,海藻的酸就把绳子腐蚀断了。大诲波涛汹涌,天空阴沉灰暗。