A pound or two

Realizing that I'd put on a pound or two, I lamented¹ to my husband, "I'm fat."

And right on cue he said what all good husbands must: "You're not fat."

To support his position, he added, "Just look around you at others, and you will see that you are not fat."

But our daughter, a high schooler, saw through it: "Mom, he's grading you on the curve!"