Display of outstanding courage

Eleazer Bokar appeared at the gates of Heaven and knocked for admittance. The great doors slowly swung open and the patriach Abraham stepped out, blowing his golden trumpet¹. When he had finished the welcoming concerto², he turned to Eleazer and said, "Greetings, blood of my blood and flesh of my flesh. God awaits you."

Recovering from the awesome³ splendor⁴ of this type of welcome, Eleazer quickly replied, "Father Abraham, I am ready to meet our God," and stepped forward to enter the celestial⁵ portals.

"Wait, my brother," said Abraham, halting Eleazer with an imperiously, upraised palm. "Before entering God's Kingdom, you must first prove that you are worthy⁶ of the honor."

"But how can I prove my worthiness," queried⁷ Eleazer.

"You must show that, at least once in your mortal life, you displayed outstanding courage. Can you recall one unquestionably brave deed?"

Eleazer's face brightened as he said, "Yes I can! I remember going to the Roman Consul's palace where I met him face to face. He was surrounded by dozens of legionnaires, all of whom were armed. Ignoring this fact, I told him that he was a camel's behind, that he was a vulture who fed upon the bones of Jerusalem's oppressed, and that he was a persecutor⁸ of humble⁹ Jews. I then spat¹⁰ in his face."

"Well," exclaimed Abraham, "I am impressed. I must agree that that was an extremely brave feat¹¹ to perform - considering the armed guards and the Roman Consul's hatred¹² of Jews. Yes, my brother, you have certainly earned admittance into Paradise, but please tell me, when did all this happen?"

"Oh," replied Eleazer casually¹³, "right before you welcomed me."