A small town
prosecuting1 attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial - a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy. And
frankly2, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you're a cheat, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was
stunned3. Not knowing what else to do he
pointed4 across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the
defense5 attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy,
bigoted6, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes, I know him."
At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both
counselors7 to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you ask her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"