Joke: Animal Football Game
文章来源: 文章作者: 发布时间:2007-07-24 02:22 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
The animals were bored. Finally, the lion had an idea. "I know a really exciting game that the humans play called football. I've seen it on T.V."

He proceeded to describe it to the rest of the animals and they all got excited about it so they decided1 to play. They went out to the field and chose up teams and were ready to begin.

The lion's team received. They were able to get two first downs and then had to punt. The mule2 punted and the rhino3 was back deep for the kick. He caught the ball, lowered his head and charged. First, he crushed a roadrunner, then two rabbits. He gored4 a wildebeast, knocked over two cows, and broke through to daylight, scoring six.

Unfortunately, they lacked a placekicker, and the score remained 6 - 0.

Late in the first half the lion's team scored a touchdown and the mule kicked the extra point. The lion's team led at halftime 7 - 6. In the locker5 room, the lion gave a peptalk.

"Look you guys. We can win this game. We've got the lead and they only have one real threat. We've got to keep the ball away from the rhino, he's a killer6. Mule, when you kick off be sure to keep it away from the rhino."

The second half began. Just as the mule was about to kick off, the rhino's team changed formation and the ball went directly to the rhino. Once again, the rhino lowered his head and was off running. First, he stomped7 two gazelles. He skewered8 a zebra, and bulldozed an elephant out of the way. It looked like he was home free. Suddenly at the twenty yard line, he dropped over dead. There were no other animals in sight anywhere near him. The lion went over to see what had happened. Right next to the dead rhino he saw a small centipede.

"Did you do this?" he asked the centipede.

"Yeah, I did." the centipede replied.

The lion retorted, "Where were you during the first half?"

"I was putting on my shoes."


点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 decided lvqzZd     
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的
参考例句:
  • This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
  • There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。
2 mule G6RzI     
n.骡子,杂种,执拗的人
参考例句:
  • A mule is a cross between a mare and a donkey.骡子是母马和公驴的杂交后代。
  • He is an old mule.他是个老顽固。
3 rhino xjmztD     
n.犀牛,钱, 现金
参考例句:
  • The rhino charged headlong towards us.犀牛急速地向我们冲来。
  • They have driven the rhino to the edge of extinction.他们已经令犀牛濒临灭绝。
4 gored 06e2f8539ee9ec452c00dba81fa714c1     
v.(动物)用角撞伤,用牙刺破( gore的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • He was gored by a bull. 他被公牛顶伤。
  • The bull gored the farmer to death. 公牛用角把农夫抵死了。 来自《简明英汉词典》
5 locker 8pzzYm     
n.更衣箱,储物柜,冷藏室,上锁的人
参考例句:
  • At the swimming pool I put my clothes in a locker.在游泳池我把衣服锁在小柜里。
  • He moved into the locker room and began to slip out of his scrub suit.他走进更衣室把手术服脱下来。
6 killer rpLziK     
n.杀人者,杀人犯,杀手,屠杀者
参考例句:
  • Heart attacks have become Britain's No.1 killer disease.心脏病已成为英国的头号致命疾病。
  • The bulk of the evidence points to him as her killer.大量证据证明是他杀死她的。
7 stomped 0884b29fb612cae5a9e4eb0d1a257b4a     
v.跺脚,践踏,重踏( stomp的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • She stomped angrily out of the office. 她怒气冲冲,重步走出办公室。
  • She slammed the door and stomped (off) out of the house. 她砰的一声关上了门,暮暮地走出了屋了。 来自辞典例句
8 skewered d137866bfd4e5979e32a18ac897f6079     
v.(用串肉扦或类似物)串起,刺穿( skewer的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • He skewered his victim through the neck. 他用扦子刺穿了受害人的脖子。 来自辞典例句
  • He skewered his foot on a nail. 他的脚踩在钉子上了。 来自互联网
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