Three men were trying to rob a bank, when they were shot and killed. God comes down to them and said, "I will give all three of you the chance to live, and you get one final chance to steal something." The men all agreed. They were willing to do anything to live. God says to them, "Go to the fruit market down the street and steal three fruit of any kind. Then come back here and I will tell you what to do." The first man came back, carrying 3 cherries. God says to him, "If you can put all 3 cherries up your butt¹ without making a face, I will give you your life back. If not, you are going to hell." The man puts 2 cherries up his butt, but as he is sticking the third one inside he makes a grunting² face. God snaps his fingers and sends the man to hell. The second man came back carrying three apples. God says to him, "If you can stick all three of those apples up your butt, I will give you your life back. If not, you are going to hell. So the man sticks 2 apples up his butt. But when he puts the third one inside, he starts laughing hysterically³. God says to him, "You have made a face, and now you will go to hell, but I'm curious...why did you start laughing?" And the man said then, "Cuz Larry is coming back, and he stole 3 watermelons."

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