An Irishman in a wheelchair rolls into a bar and asks the waitress for a cup of coffee. He then looks over at the bar and asks the waitress, "Is that Jesus?" The waitress says that it is, so the Irishman says, "Give him a cup of coffee... I'll pay."

A few minutes later, an Englishman with a humped back walks in and asks the waitress for a cup of tea. He then asks the waitress, "Hey... is that Jesus over there?" The waitress nods and so the Englishman says, "Give 'im a cup of tea... on me."

A few minutes later, a Redneck walks in on a pair of crutches¹. He says, "Hey, sweet thang... how's 'bout² an ice-cold coke. Holy smokes... is that Jesus?" The waitress says, "Sure is." So, the Redneck says, "Give the ol' boy a coke... put it on my tab."

Later, Jesus gets up to leave, walks over to the Irishman, touches him and says, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Irishman gets up out of his wheelchair and dances a jig³ out of the door.

Jesus walks over to the Englishman, touches him and says, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Englishman stretches out his back and does backflips out the door.

Jesus walks over to the Redneck. Then, the Redneck gets up, backs away, and says, "Stay away from me... I'm drawin' disability!"