FOR some weeks Christie rested and refreshed herself by making her room gay and comfortable with the gifts
lavished1 on her by the Carrols, and by sharing with others the money which
Harry2 had
smuggled3 into her possession after she had
steadily4 refused to take one penny more than the sum agreed upon when she first went to them.
She took infinite satisfaction in sending one hundred dollars to Uncle Enos, for she had accepted what he gave her as a loan, and set her heart on repaying every fraction of it. Another hundred she gave to Hepsey, who found her out and came to report her trials and
tribulations5. The good soul had ventured South and tried to buy her mother. But "ole missis" would not let her go at any price, and the faithful
chattel6 would not run away. Sorely disappointed, Hepsey had been obliged to submit; but her trip was not a failure, for she
liberated7 several brothers and sent them
triumphantly8 to Canada.
"You must take it, Hepsey, for I could not rest happy if I put it away to lie idle while you can save men and women from
torment9 with it. I'd give it if it was my last penny, for I can help in no other way; and if I need money, I can always earn it, thank God!" said Christie, as Hepsey hesitated to take so much from a fellow-worker.
The thought of that investment lay warm at Christie's heart, and never woke a regret, for well she knew that every dollar of it would be blessed, since shares in the Underground Railroad pay splendid
dividends10 that never fail.
Another portion of her fortune, as she called Harry's gift, was
bestowed11 in wedding presents upon Lucy, who at length succeeded in winning the heart of the owner of the "heavenly eyes" and "distracting legs;" and, having gained her point, married him with dramatic celerity, and went West to follow the fortunes of her lord.
The old theatre was to be
demolished12 and the company
scattered13, so a farewell festival was held, and Christie went to it, feeling more
solitary14 than ever as she bade her old friends a long good-bye.
The rest of the money burned in her pocket, but she
prudently15 put it by for a rainy day, and fell to work again when her brief vacation was over.
Hearing of a chance for a good needle-woman in a large and well-conducted mantua-making establishment, she secured it as a temporary thing, for she wanted to divert her mind from that last sad experience by
entirely16 different employment and surroundings. She liked to return at night to her own little home, solitary and simple as it was, and felt a great
repugnance17 to accept any place where she would be mixed up with family affairs again.
So day after day she went to her seat in the workroom where a dozen other young women sat sewing busily on gay garments, with as much lively gossip to
beguile18 the time as Miss Cotton, the forewoman, would allow.
For a while it diverted Christie, as she had a feminine love for pretty things, and enjoyed seeing delicate silks,
costly19 lace, and all the indescribable fantasies of fashion. But as spring came on, the old desire for something fresh and free began to haunt her, and she had both waking and sleeping dreams of a home in the country somewhere, with cows and flowers, clothes
bleaching20 on green grass, bob-o'-links making rapturous music by the river, and the smell of new-mown hay, all lending their charms to the picture she painted for herself.
Most assuredly she would have gone to find these things, led by the instincts of a healthful nature, had not one slender tie held her till it grew into a bond so strong she could not break it.
Among her companions was one, and one only, who attracted her. The others were well-meaning girls, but full of the
frivolous21 purposes and pleasures which their tastes prompted and their dull life fostered. Dress, gossip, and wages were the three topics which absorbed them. Christie soon tired of the innumerable changes rung upon these themes, and took refuge in her own thoughts, soon learning to enjoy them undisturbed by the clack of many tongues about her. Her evenings at home were
devoted22 to books, for she had the true New England woman's desire for education, and read or studied for the love of it. Thus she had much to think of as her needle flew, and was rapidly becoming a sort of sewing-machine when life was brightened for her by the finding of a friend.
Among the girls was one quiet,
skilful23 creature, whose black dress,
peculiar24 face, and silent ways attracted Christie. Her evident desire to be let alone amused the new comer at first, and she made no effort to know her. But presently she became aware that Rachel watched her with
covert25 interest, stealing quick, shy glances at her as she sat
musing26 over her work. Christie smiled at her when she caught these glances, as if to
reassure27 the looker of her good-will. But Rachel only colored, kept her eyes
fixed28 on her work, and was more reserved than ever.
This interested Christie, and she fell to studying this young woman with some curiosity, for she was different from the others. Though evidently younger than she looked, Rachel's face was that of one who had known some great sorrow, some deep experience; for there were lines on the forehead that contrasted strongly with the bright, abundant hair above it; in
repose29, the youthfully red, soft lips had a mournful
droop30, and the eyes were old with that indescribable expression which comes to those who count their lives by emotions, not by years.
Strangely haunting eyes to Christie, for they seemed to appeal to her with a mute
eloquence31 she could not resist. In vain did Rachel answer her with quiet coldness, nod silently when she wished her a cheery "good morning," and keep
resolutely32 in her own somewhat
isolated33 corner, though invited to share the sunny window where the other sat. Her eyes
belied34 her words, and those
fugitive35 glances betrayed the
longing36 of a lonely heart that dared not yield itself to the
genial37 companionship so freely offered it.
Christie was sure of this, and would not be
repulsed38; for her own heart was very solitary. She missed Helen, and longed to fill the empty place. She wooed this shy, cold girl as patiently and as gently as a lover might,
determined39 to win her confidence, because all the others had failed to do it. Sometimes she left a flower in Rachel's basket, always smiled and nodded as she entered, and often stopped to admire the work of her tasteful fingers. It was impossible to resist such friendly
overtures40, and slowly Rachel's coldness melted; into the
beseeching41 eyes came a look of
gratitude42, the more
touching43 for its wordlessness, and an irrepressible smile broke over her face in answer to the cordial ones that made the sunshine of her day.
Emboldened44 by these
demonstrations45, Christie changed her seat, and quietly established between them a daily interchange of something beside needles, pins, and
spools46. Then, as Rachel did not draw back offended, she went a step farther, and, one day when they chanced to be left alone to finish off a delicate bit of work, she
spoke47 out
frankly48:
"Why can't we be friends? I want one sadly, and so do you, unless your looks deceive me. We both seem to be alone in the world, to have had trouble, and to like one another. I won't annoy you by any impertinent curiosity, nor burden you with uninteresting confidences; I only want to feel that you like me a little and don't mind my
liking49 you a great deal. Will you be my friend, and let me be yours?"
A great tear rolled clown upon the shining silk in Rachel's hands as she looked into Christie's earnest face, and answered with an almost
passionate50 gratitude in her own:
"You can never need a friend as much as I do, or know what a blessed thing it is to find such an one as you are."
"Then I may love you, and not be afraid of offending?" cried Christie, much touched.
"Yes. But remember I didn't ask it first," said Rachel, half dropping the hand she had held in both her own.
"You proud creature! I'll remember; and when we quarrel, I'll take all the blame upon myself."
Then Christie kissed her warmly, whisked away the tear, and began to paint the delights in store for them in her most enthusiastic way, being much elated with her victory; while Rachel listened with a newly
kindled51 light in her lovely eyes, and a smile that showed how
winsome52 her face had been before many tears washed its bloom away, and much trouble made it old too soon.
Christie kept her word, - asked no questions, volunteered no confidences, but
heartily53 enjoyed the new friendship, and found that it gave to life the
zest54 which it had lacked before. Now some one cared for her, and, better still, she could make some one happy, and in the act of
lavishing55 the affection of her generous nature on a creature sadder and more solitary than herself, she found a satisfaction that never lost its charm. There was nothing in her possession that she did not offer Rachel, from the whole of her heart to the larger half of her little room.
"I'm tired of thinking only of myself. It makes me selfish and low-spirited; for I'm not a bit interesting. I must love somebody, and 'love them hard,' as children say; so why can't you come and stay with me? There's room enough, and we could be so
cosy56 evenings with our books and work. I know you need some one to look after you, and I love dearly to take care of people. Do come," she would say, with most
persuasive57 hospitality.
But Rachel always answered steadily: "Not yet, Christie, not yet. I 've got something to do before I can think of doing any thing so beautiful as that. Only love me, dear, and some day I'll show you all my heart, and thank you as I ought."
So Christie was content to wait, and, meantime, enjoyed much; for, with Rachel as a friend, she ceased to care for country pleasures, found happiness in the work that gave her better food than
mere58 daily bread, and never thought of change; for love can make a home for itself anywhere.
A very bright and happy time was this in Christie's life; but, like most happy times, it was very brief. Only one summer allowed for the blossoming of the friendship that budded so slowly in the spring; then the frost came and killed the flowers; but the root lived long
underneath59 the snows of suffering, doubt, and absence.
Coming to her work late one morning, she found the usually orderly room in confusion. Some of the girls were crying; some whispering together, - all looking excited and dismayed. Mrs. King sat
majestically60 at her table, with an
ominous61 frown upon her face. Miss Cotton stood beside her, looking unusually sour and stern, for the ancient virgin's temper was not of the best. Alone, before them all, with her face hidden in her hands, and despair in every line of her
drooping62 figure, stood Rachel, - a
meek63 culprit at the stern bar of justice, where women try a sister woman.
"What's the matter?" cried Christie, pausing on the threshold.
MRS. KING AND MISS COTTON.
Rachel shivered, as if the sound of that familiar voice was a fresh wound, but she did not lift her head; and Mrs. King answered, with a nervous emphasis that made the
bugles64 of her head-dress
rattle65 dismally66:
"A very sad thing, Miss Devon, - very sad, indeed; a thing which never occurred in my establishment before, and never shall again. It appears that Rachel, whom we all considered a most respectable and
worthy67 girl, has been quite the reverse. I
shudder68 to think what the consequences of my taking her without a character (a thing I never do, and was only
tempted69 by her superior taste as a trimmer) might have been if Miss Cotton, having suspicions, had not made strict
inquiry70 and confirmed them."
"That was a kind and generous act, and Miss Cotton must feel proud of it," said Christie, with an indignant recollection of Mr. Fletcher's "cautious
inquiries71" about herself.
"It was
perfectly72 right and proper, Miss Devon; and I thank her for her care of my interests." And Mrs. King bowed her acknowledgment of the service with a perfect castanet accompaniment, whereat Miss Cotton
bridled73 with
malicious74 complacency.
"Mrs. King, are you sure of this?" said Christie. "Miss Cotton does not like Rachel because her work is so much praised. May not her
jealousy75 make her unjust, or her
zeal76 for you mislead her?"
"I thank you for your polite insinuations, miss," returned the
irate77 forewoman. "I never make mistakes; but you will find that you have made a very great one in choosing Rachel for your
bosom78 friend instead of gome one who would be a credit to you. Ask the creature herself if all I've said of her isn't true. She can't deny it."
With the same indefinable
misgiving79 which had held her
aloof80, Christie turned to Rachel, lifted up the hidden face with gentle force, and looked into it
imploringly81, as she whispered: "Is it true?"
The woful
countenance82 she saw made any other answer needless. Involuntarily her hands fell away, and she hid her own face, uttering the one reproach, which, tender and tearful though it was, seemed harder to be borne than the stern
condemnation83 gone before.
"Oh, Rachel, I so loved and trusted you!"
The grief, affection, and regret that trembled in her voice roused Rachel from her state of passive endurance and gave her courage to plead for herself. But it was Christie whom she addressed, Christie whose pardon she
implored84, Christie's sorrowful reproach that she most keenly felt.
"Yes, it is true," she said, looking only at the woman who had been the first to befriend and now was the last to desert her. "It is true that I once went astray, but God knows I have
repented86; that for years I've tried to be an honest girl again, and that but for His help I should be a far sadder creature than I am this day. Christie, you can never know how bitter hard it is to outlive a sin like mine, and struggle up again from such a fall. It clings to me; it won't be shaken off or buried out of sight. No sooner do I find a safe place like this, and try to forget the past, than some one reads my secret in my face and hunts me down. It seems very cruel, very hard, yet it is my punishment, so I try to bear it, and begin again. What hurts me now more than all the rest, what breaks my heart, is that I deceived you. I never meant to do it. I did not seek you, did I? I tried to be cold and stiff; never asked for love, though starving for it, till you came to me, so kind, so generous, so dear, - how could I help it? Oh, how could I help it then?"
Christie had watched Rachel while she spoke, and spoke to her alone; her heart
yearned87 toward this one friend, for she still loved her, and, loving, she believed in her.
"I don't reproach you, dear: I don't despise or desert you, and though I'm grieved and disappointed, I'll stand by you still, because you need me more than ever now, and I want to prove that I am a true friend. Mrs. King, please forgive and let poor Rachel stay here, safe among us."
"Miss Devon, I'm surprised at you! By no means; it would be the ruin of my establishment; not a girl would remain, and the character of my rooms would be lost for ever," replied Mrs. King,
goaded88 on by the
relentless89 Cotton.
"But where will she go if you send her away? Who will employ her if you inform against her? What stranger will believe in her if we, who have known her so long, fail to befriend her now? Mrs. King, think of your own daughters, and be a mother to this poor girl for their sake."
That last stroke touched the woman's heart; her cold eye
softened90, her hard mouth relaxed, and pity was about to win the day, when
prudence91, in the shape of Miss Cotton, turned the scale, for that spiteful spinster suddenly cried out, in a burst of righteous
wrath92:
"If that hussy stays, I leave this establishment for ever!" and followed up the blow by putting on her
bonnet93 with a flourish.
At this spectacle, self-interest got the better of sympathy in Mrs. King's worldly mind. To lose Cotton was to lose her right hand, and charity at that price was too expensive a luxury to be indulged in; so she hardened her heart, composed her features, and said, impressively:
"Take off your bonnet, Cotton; I have no intention of offending you, or any one else, by such a step. I forgive you, Rachel, and I pity you; but I can't think of allowing you to stay. There are proper institutions for such as you, and I advise you to go to one and
repent85. You were paid Saturday night, so nothing prevents your leaving at once. Time is money here, and we are wasting it. Young ladies, take your seats."
All but Christie obeyed, yet no one touched a needle, and Mrs. King sat, hurriedly stabbing pins into the fat cushion on her breast, as if testing the hardness of her heart.
Rachel's eye went round the room; saw pity, aversion, or contempt, on every face, but met no answering glance, for even Christie's eyes were
bent94 thoughtfully on the ground, and Christie's heart seemed closed against her. As she looked her whole manner changed; her tears ceased to fall, her face grew hard, and a reckless mood seemed to take possession of her, as if finding herself
deserted95 by womankind, she would desert her own womanhood.
"I might have known it would be so," she said
abruptly96, with a bitter smile, sadder to see than her most hopeless tears. "It's no use for such as me to try; better go back to the old life, for there are kinder hearts among the sinners than among the saints, and no one can live without a bit of love. Your Magdalen
Asylums97 are
penitentiaries98, not homes; I won't go to any of them. Your
piety99 isn't worth much, for though you read in your Bible how the Lord treated a poor soul like me, yet when I stretch out my hand to you for help, not one of all you
virtuous100,
Christian101 women dare take it and keep me from a life that's worse than hell."
As she spoke Rachel flung out her hand with a half-
defiant102 gesture, and Christie took it. That touch, full of womanly
compassion103, seemed to exorcise the desperate spirit that
possessed104 the poor girl in her despair, for, with a
stifled105 exclamation106, she sunk down at Christie's feet, and lay there weeping in all the passionate abandonment of love and gratitude,
remorse107 and shame. Never had human voice sounded so heavenly sweet to her as that which broke the silence of the room, as this one friend said, with the earnestness of a true and tender heart:
"Mrs. King, if you send her away, I must take her in; for if she does go back to the old life, the sin of it will lie at our door, and God will remember it against us in the end. Some one must trust her, help her, love her, and so save her, as nothing else will. Perhaps I can do this better than you, - at least, I'll try; for even if I risk the loss of my good name, I could bear that better than the thought that Rachel had lost the work of these hard years for want of upholding now. She shall come home with me; no one there need know of this discovery, and I will take any work to her that you will give me, to keep her from want and its temptations. Will you do this, and let me sew for less, if I can pay you for the kindness in no other way?"
Poor Mrs. King was "much tumbled up and down in her own mind;" she longed to consent, but Cotton's eye was upon her, and Cotton's departure would be an irreparable loss, so she
decided108 to end the matter in the most summary manner.
Plunging109 a particularly large pin into her cushioned breast, as if it was a relief to
inflict110 that mock torture upon herself, she said sharply:
"It is impossible. You can do as you please, Miss Devon, but I prefer to wash my hands of the affair at once and entirely."
Christie's eye went from the figure at her feet to the hard-featured woman who had been a kind and just mistress until now, and she asked, anxiously:
"Do you mean that you wash your hands of me also, if I stand by Rachel?"
"I do. I'm very sorry, but my young ladies must keep respectable company, or leave my service," was the brief reply, for Mrs. King grew grimmer externally as the mental rebellion increased internally.
"Then I will leave it!" cried Christie, with an indignant voice and eye. "Come, dear, we'll go together." And without a look or word for any in the room, she raised the
prostrate111 girl, and led her out into the little hall.
There she essayed to comfort her, but before many words had passed her lips Rachel looked up, and she was silent with surprise, for the face she saw was neither despairing nor defiant, but beautifully sweet and clear, as the unfallen spirit of the woman shone through the grateful eyes, and blessed her for her
loyalty112.
"Christie, you have done enough for me," she said. "Go back, and keep the good place you need, for such are hard to find. I can get on alone; I'm used to this, and the pain will soon be over."
"I'll not go back!" cried Christie, hotly. "I'll do slop-work and starve, before I'll stay with such a narrow-minded, cold-hearted woman. Come home with me at once, and let us lay our plans together."
"No, dear; if I wouldn't go when you first asked me, much less will I go now, for I've done you harm enough already. I never can thank you for your great goodness to me, never tell you what it has been to me. We must part now; but some day I'll come back and show you that I've not forgotten how you loved and helped and trusted me, when all the others cast me off."
Vain were Christie's arguments and appeals. Rachel was immovable, and all her friend could win from her was a promise to send word, now and then, how things
prospered113 with her.
"And, Rachel, I charge you to come to me in any strait, no matter what it is, no matter where I am; for if any thing could break my heart, it would be to know that you had gone back to the old life, because there was no one to help and hold you up."
"I never can go back; you have saved me, Christie, for you love me, you have faith in me, and that will keep me strong and safe when you are gone. Oh, my dear, my dear, God bless you for ever and for ever!"
Then Christie, remembering only that they were two loving women, alone in a world of sin and sorrow, took Rachel in her arms, kissed and cried over her with sisterly affection, and watched her prayerfully, as she went away to begin her hard task anew, with nothing but the touch of innocent lips upon her cheek, the baptism, of tender tears upon her forehead to keep her from despair.
Still cherishing the hope that Rachel would come back to her, Christie neither returned to Mrs. King nor sought another place of any sort, but took home work from a larger establishment, and sat sewing
diligently114 in her little room, waiting, hoping, longing for her friend. But month after month went by, and no word, no sign came to comfort her. She would not doubt, yet she could not help fearing, and in her nightly prayer no petition was more
fervently115 made than that which asked the Father of both saint and sinner to keep poor Rachel safe, and bring her back in his good time.
Never had she been so lonely as now, for Christie had a social heart, and, having known the joy of a cordial friendship even for a little while, life seemed very barren to her when she lost it. No new friend took Rachel's place, for none came to her, and a feeling of loyalty kept her from seeking one. But she suffered for the want of genial society, for all the tenderness of her nature seemed to have been roused by that brief but most sincere affection. Her hungry heart clamored for the happiness that was its right, and grew very heavy as she watched friends or lovers walking in the summer
twilight116 when she took her evening stroll. Often her eyes followed some
humble117 pair, longing to bless and to be blessed by the divine passion whose magic beautifies the little milliner and her lad with the same tender grace as the poet and the mistress whom he makes
immortal118 in a song. But neither friend nor lover came to Christie, and she said to herself, with a sad sort of courage:
"I shall be solitary all my life, perhaps; so the sooner I make up my mind to it, the easier it will be to bear."
At Christmas-tide she made a little festival for herself, by giving to each of the household
drudges119 the most generous gift she could afford, for no one else thought of them, and having known some of the hardships of servitude herself, she had much sympathy with those in like case.
Then, with the pleasant recollection of two plain faces, brightened by gratitude, surprise, and joy, she went out into the busy streets to forget the
solitude120 she left behind her.
Very gay they were with snow and sleigh-bells, holly-boughs, and garlands, below, and Christmas sunshine in the winter sky above. All faces shone, all voices had a cheery ring, and everybody stepped briskly on errands of good-will. Up and down went Christie, making herself happy in the happiness of others. Looking in at the shop-windows, she watched, with interest, the purchases of busy parents, calculating how best to fill the little socks hung up at home, with a childish faith that never must be disappointed, no matter how hard the times might be. She was glad to see so many turkeys on their way to
garnish121 hospitable122 tables, and hoped that all the dear home circles might be found unbroken, though she had place in none. No Christmas-tree went by leaving a whiff of piny sweetness behind, that she did not wish it all success, and picture to herself the merry little people dancing in its light. And whenever she saw a
ragged123 child eying a window full of goodies, smiling even, while it shivered, she could not resist playing Santa Claus till her purse was empty, sending the poor little souls
enraptured124 home with oranges and apples in either hand, and splendid sweeties in their pockets, for the babies.
No envy
mingled125 with the
melancholy126 that would not be
dispelled127 even by these gentle acts, for her heart was very tender that night, and if any one had asked what gifts she desired most, she would have answered with a look more pathetic than any shivering child had given her:
"I want the sound of a loving voice; the touch of a friendly hand."
Going home, at last, to the lonely little room where no Christmas fire burned, no tree shone, no household group awaited her, she climbed the long, dark stairs, with drops on her cheeks, warmer than any melted snow-flake could have left, and opening her door paused on the threshold, smiling with wonder and delight, for in her absence some gentle spirit had remembered her. A fire burned cheerily upon the
hearth128, her lamp was lighted, a lovely rose-tree, in full bloom, filled the air with its delicate breath, and in its shadow lay a note from Rachel.
"A merry Christmas and a happy New Year, Christie! Long ago you gave me your little rose; I have watched and tended it for your sake, dear, and now when I want to show my love and thankfulness, I give it back again as my one treasure. I crept in while you were gone, because I feared I might harm you in some way if you saw me. I longed to stay and tell you that I am safe and well, and busy, with your good face looking into mine, but I don't deserve that yet. Only love me, trust me, pray for me, and some day you shall know what you have done for me. Till then, God bless and keep you, dearest friend, your RACHEL."
Never had sweeter tears fallen than those that dropped upon the little tree as Christie took it in her arms, and all the
rosy129 clusters leaned toward her as if eager to deliver tender messages. Surely her wish was granted now, for friendly hands had been at work for her. Warm against her heart lay words as precious as if uttered by a loving voice, and nowhere, on that happy night, stood a fairer Christmas tree than that which bloomed so beautifully from the heart of a Magdalen who loved much and was forgiven.