Chapter 72
In my case, to protect myself from Richard Parker while I trained him, I made a shield with a turtle shell. I cut a
notch1 on each side of the shell and connected them with a length of rope. The shield was heavier than I would have liked, but do soldiers ever get to choose their
ordnance2?
The first time I tried, Richard Parker bared his teeth, rotated his ears full round,
vomited3 a short guttural roar and charged. A great, full-clawed paw rose in the air and
cuffed4 my shield. The blow sent me flying off the boat. I hit the water and instantly let go of the shield. It sank without a trace after hitting me in the shin. I was beside myself with terror - of Richard Parker, but also of being in the water. In my mind a shark was at that very second shooting up for me. I swam for the raft in
frantic5 strokes,
precisely6 the sort of wild thrashing that sharks find so deliciously
inviting7. Luckily there were no sharks. I reached the raft, let out all the rope and sat with my arms wrapped around my knees and my head down, trying to put out the fire of fear that was blazing within me. It was a long time before the trembling of my body stopped completely. I stayed on the raft for the rest of that day and the whole night. I did not eat or drink.
I was at it again next time I caught a turtle. Its shell was smaller,
lighter8, and made for a better shield. Once more I advanced and started stamping on the middle bench with my foot.
I wonder if those who hear this story will understand that my behaviour was not an act of
insanity9 or a
covert10 suicide attempt but a simple necessity. Either I tamed him, made him see who was Number One and who was Number Two - or I died the day I wanted to climb aboard the lifeboat during rough weather and he objected.
If I survived my
apprenticeship11 as a high seas animal trainer it was because Richard Parker did not really want to attack me. Tigers, indeed all animals, do not favour violence as a means of settling scores. When animals fight, it is with the intent to kill and with the understanding that they may be killed. A clash is
costly12. And so animals have a full system of cautionary signals designed to avoid a showdown, and they are quick to back down when they feel they can. Rarely will a tiger attack a fellow
predator13 without warning. Typically a head-on rush for the
adversary14 will be made, with much
snarling15 and
growling16. But just before it is too late, the tiger will freeze, the menace
rumbling17 deep in its throat. It will
appraise18 the situation. If it decides that there is no threat, it will turn away, feeling that its point has been made.
Richard Parker made his point with me four times. Four times he struck at me with his right paw and sent me overboard, and four times I lost my shield. I was terrified before, during and after each attack, and I spent a long time shivering with fear on the raft. Eventually I learned to read the signals he was sending me. I found that with his ears, his eyes, his whiskers, his teeth, his tail and his throat, he
spoke19 a simple, forcefully
punctuated20 language that told me what his next move might be. I learned to back down before he lifted his paw in the air.
Then I made my point, feet on the gunnel, boat rolling, my single-note language blasting from the whistle, and Richard Parker moaning and
gasping21 at the bottom of the boat.
My fifth shield lasted me the rest of his training.
第七十二章
我的情况是,为了在训练理查德·帕克的时候保护自己,我用海龟壳做了一只盾牌。我在龟壳两端各开了一个槽口,用一根绳子把两端连接起来。盾牌比我想像的要重,但是士兵又怎么能选择军械呢?
第一次做这番尝试时,理查德·帕克露出牙齿,耳朵完全转到了前面,喉咙里发出短短的一声吼叫,朝我冲了过来。一只巨大的脚掌举了起来,爪尖完全伸了出来,朝盾牌猛击一掌。这一掌把我从船上打飞了出去。我一头撞进水里,立刻松开了盾牌。
盾 牌先是沉下水去,不见了踪迹,接着又打在我的胫骨上。我害怕得几乎神经错乱了——既怕理查德·帕克,也怕海水。我以为就在那一刻会有一条鲨鱼从水里蹿出来 要吃我。我发疯一般朝小筏子游去,而疯狂的划水动作恰恰非常吸引鲨鱼。幸运的是,没有鲨鱼。我到了小筏子上,把缆绳放到最长,双臂抱膝,低头坐着,努力熄 灭心中熊熊燃烧的恐惧之火。过了很长时间,我的身体才完全停止颤抖。那天后来的时间和那一整夜,我都待在小筏子上。我没有吃也没有喝。
第二次抓住一只海龟时,我又做了一只盾牌。这只龟壳小一些,轻一些,更适合做盾牌。我又一次向前进,在中间的坐板上跺着脚。
我不知道听故事的人是否明白,我的行为并非疯狂,也不是经过掩饰的自杀企图,而完全是出于必要。要不就驯服他,让他明白谁是老大谁是老二——要不就在恶劣的天气里爬到救生艇上时因为他反对而死去。
如 果说我作为公海驯兽师的学徒期已满,而我还活着,那是因为理查德·帕克并不是真的想袭击我。老虎,其实是所有动物,并不軎欢用暴力来解决纠纷。动物互相搏 斗的目的是杀死对方,同时它们也明白,自己也可能被杀死。冲突的代价是巨大的。因此,动物有一套完整的警告信号系统,以避免最后摊牌,而且,只要它们感到 自己可以退缩,便立刻这么做。老虎很少不发出警告就袭击另一只食肉动物。典型的情况是,它们会迎面向对手冲去,一边发出咆哮声和吼叫声。但是在情况变得不 可挽回之前,老虎会突然停住不动,喉咙里发出低沉的威胁的声音。它会估计一下形势。如果结论是威胁并不存在,它就会转身离去,感到自己的意图已经表明了。
理 查德·帕克四次向我表明了他的意图。他四次用右爪打我,把我打到海里去,四次都让我丢了盾牌。在他袭击之前,袭击的时候,和袭击之后,我都很害怕,因为害 怕而在小筏子上颤抖很长时间。最后,我学会了理解他向我发出的信号。我发现他用耳朵、眼睛、胡须、牙齿、尾巴和喉咙在说一种简单的、十分清晰有力的语言, 告诉我他下一步会做什么。我学会了在他举起爪子之前就退回去。
后来,我表明了我的意图。我站在舷边,小船摇晃着,我的单音节的语言从哨子里吹了出来,而理查德·帕克在船底呜咽着,喘息着。第五只盾牌在后来训练理查德·帕克的过程中一直完好无损。