The tiger phoned the zebra
and invited him to dine.
He said "If you could join me
that would simply be divine."
The zebra said "I thank you,
but respectfully decline.
I heard you ate the antelope1;
he was a friend of mine."
On hearing this the tiger cried
"I must admit it's true!
I also ate the buffalo2,
the llama and the gnu.
And yes I ate the warthog,
the gazelle and kangaroo,
but I could never eat a creature
beautiful as you.
"You see I have a secret
I'm embarrassed to confide3:
I look on you with envy
and a modicum4 of pride.
Of all the creatures ever known,"
the tiger gently sighed,
"It seems we are the only two
with such a stripy hide.
"Now seeing how we share this
strong resemblance of the skin,
I only can conclude that we are
just as close as kin5.
This means you are my brother
and, though fearsome I have been,
I could not eat my brother,
that would surely be a sin."
The zebra thought, and then replied
"I'm certain you are right.
The stripy coats we both possess
are such a handsome sight!
My brother, will you let me
reconsider if I might?
My calendar is empty so
please let us dine tonight."
The tiger met the zebra in
his brand-new fancy car
and drove him to a restaurant
which wasn't very far.
And when they both were seated
at a table near the bar,
the zebra asked "What's on the grill6?"
The tiger said "You are."
"But please, you cannot dine on me!"
the outraged7 zebra cried.
"To cook me up and eat me
is a thing I can't abide8.
You asked me for your trust
and I unwarily complied.
You said you could not eat me
now you plan to have me fried?"
"And what about the envy
and the modicum of pride?
And what of us as brothers
since we share a stripy hide?"
"I'm sorry," said the tiger
and he smiled as he replied,
"but I love the taste of zebra
so, in other words, I lied."