IT HAD been hard for him that spake it to have put more truth and untruth together in few words, than in that speech, Whatsoever¹ is delighted in solitude², is either a wild beast or a god.  For it is most true, that a natural and secret hatred³, and aversation towards society, in any man, hath somewhat of the savage⁴ beast; but it is most untrue, that it should have any character at all, of the divine nature; except it proceed, not out of a pleasure in solitude, but out of a love and desire to sequester⁶ a man's self, for a higher conversation: such as is found to have been falsely and feignedly in some of the heathen; as Epimenides the Canadian, Numa the Roman, Empedocles the Sicilian, and Apollonius of Tyana;  and truly and really, in divers⁷ of the ancient hermits⁸ and holy fathers of the church.  But little do men perceive what solitude is, and how far it extendeth.  For a crowd is not company; and faces are but a gallery of pictures; and talk but a tinkling⁹ cymbal¹⁰, where there is no love.  The Latin adage¹¹ meeteth with it a little: Magna civitas , magna solitudo; because in a great town friends are scattered¹²; so that there is not that fellowship, for the most part, which is in less neighborhoods.  But we may go further, and affirm most truly, that it is a mere¹³ and miserable¹⁴　solitude to want true friends; without which the　world is but a wilderness¹⁵; and even in this sense also of solitude, whosoever in the frame of his nature and affections, is unfit for friendship, he taketh it of the beast, and not from humanity.
 

A principal fruit of friendship, is the ease and discharge of the fulness and swellings of the heart, which passions of all kinds do cause and induce. We know diseases of stoppings, and suffocations, are the most dangerous in the body; and it is not much otherwise in the mind; you may take sarza to open the liver, steel to open the spleen, flowers of sulphur for the lungs, castoreum for the brain; but no receipt openeth the heart, but a true friend; to whom you may impart griefs, joys, fears, hopes, suspicions, counsels, and whatsoever lieth upon the heart to oppress it, in a kind of civil shrift or confession¹⁶.  

 
 “喜欢孤独的人不是野兽便是神灵”。说这话的人若要在寥寥数语之中，更能把真理和邪说放在一处，那就很难了。因为，若说一个人心里有了一种天生的、隐秘的、对社会的憎恨嫌弃，则那个人不免带点野兽底性质，这是极其真实的；然而要说这样的一个人居然有任何神灵底性质，则是极不真实的。只有一点可为例外，那就是当这种憎恨社会的心理不是出于对孤独的爱好而是出于一种想把自己退出社会以求更崇高的生活的心理的时候；这样的人异教徒中有些人曾冒充过，如克瑞蒂人埃辟曼尼底斯罗马人努马西西利人安辟道克利斯和蒂安那人阿波郎尼亚斯是也；而基督教会中许多的古隐者和长老则确有如此者。但是一般人并不大明白何为孤独以及孤独底范围。因为在没有“仁爱”的地方，一群的人众并不能算做一个团体，许多的面目也仅仅是一列图画；而交谈则不过是铙钹丁令作声而且。这种情形有句拉丁成语略能形容之：“一座大城市就是一片大荒野”；因为在一座大城市里朋友们是散居各处的，所以就其大概而言，不像在小一点的城镇里，有那样的交情。但是我们不妨更进一步并且很真实地断言说，缺乏真正的朋友乃是最纯粹最可怜的孤独；没有友谊则斯世不过是一片荒野；我们还可以用这个意义来论“孤独”说，凡是天性不配交友的人其性情可说是来自禽兽而不是来自人类的。

友谊底主要效用之一就在使人心中的愤懑抑郁之气得以宣泄弛放，这些不平之气是各种的情感都可以引起的。闭塞之症于人底身体最为凶险，这是我们知道的；在人底精神方面亦复如此：你可以服撒尔沙以通肝，服钢以通脾，服硫华以通肺，服海狸胶以通脑，然而除了一个真心的朋友之外没有一样药剂是可以通心的。对一个真心的朋友你可以传达你底忧愁、欢悦、恐惧、希望、疑忌、谏净，以及任何压在你心上的事情，有如一种教堂以外的忏悔一样.

 It is a strange thing to observe, how high a rate great kings and monarchs¹⁷ do set upon this fruit of friendship, whereof we speak: so great, as they purchase it, many times, at the hazard of their own safety and greatness.  For princes, in regard of the distance of their fortune from that of their subjects and servants, cannot gather this fruit, except (to make themselves capable thereof) they raise some persons to be, as it were, companions and almost equals to themselves, which many times sorteth to inconvenience.  The modern languages give unto such persons the name of favorites, or privadoes; as if it were matter of grace, or conversation.  But the Roman name attaineth the true use and cause thereof, naming them participes curarum; for it is that which tieth the knot.And we see plainly that this hath been done, not by weak and passionate¹⁸ princes only, but by the wisest and most politic¹⁹ that ever reigned²⁰; who have oftentimes joined to themselves some of their servants; whom both themselves have called friends, and allowed other likewise to call them inthe same manner; using the word which is received between private men. 

L. Sylla, when he commanded Rome, raised Pompey (after surnamed the Great) to that height, that Pompey vaunted himself for Sylla's overmatch.  For when he had carried the consulship²¹ for a friend of his, against the pursuit of Sylla, and that Sylla did a little resent thereat, and began to speak great, Pompey turned upon him again, and in effect bade him be quiet; for that more men adored the sun rising, than the sun setting.  With Julius Caesar, Decimus Brutus had obtained that interest as he set him down in his testament²², for heir in remainder, after his nephew.  And this was the man that had power with him, to draw him forth²³ to his death.  For when Caesar would have discharged the senate, in regard of some ill presages²⁴, and specially²⁵ a dream of Calpurnia; this man lifted him gently by the arm out of his chair, telling him he hoped he would not dismiss the senate, till his wife had dreamt a better dream. And it seemeth his favor was so great, as Antonius, in a letter which is recited verbatim in one of Cicero's Philippics, calleth him venefica, witch; as if he had enchanted²⁶ Caesar.  Augustus raised Agrippa (though of mean birth) to that height, as when he consulted with Maecenas, about the marriage of his daughter Julia, Maecenas took the liberty to tell him, that he must either marry his daughter to Agrippa, or take away his life; there was no third way, he had made him so great.  With Tiberius Caesar, Sejanus had ascended²⁷ to that height, as they two were termed, and reckoned, as a pair of friends.  Tiberius in a letter to him saith,Haec pro⁵ amicitia nostra non occultavi; and the whole senate dedicated²⁸ an altar to Friendship, as to a goddess, in respect of the great dearness of friendship, between them two.  The like, or more, was between Septimius Severus and Plautianus. For he forced his eldest²⁹ son to marry the daughter of Plautianus; and would often maintain Plautianus, in doing affronts³⁰ to his son; and did write also in a letter to the senate, by these words: I love the man so well, as I wish he may over-live me.Now if these princes had been as a Trajan, or a Marcus Aurelius, a man might have thought that this had proceeded of an abundant goodness of nature; but being men so wise, of such strength and severity of mind, and so extreme lovers of themselves, as all these were, it proveth most plainly that they found their own felicity (though as great as ever happened to mortal men) but as an half piece, except they mought have a friend, to make it entire; and yet, which is more, they were princes that had wives, sons, nephews; and yet all these could not supply the comfort of friendship.
                      
 许多伟大的人主帝王对于我们所说的友谊底效用之重视在我们看起来实为可异。他们之重视友谊，至于往往不顾自己底安全与尊荣以求之。盖为人君者，由于他们与臣民之间地位上的距离的原故，是不能享受友谊的——除非他们（为使自己能享受友谊起见）把某人擢升到他们底伴侣或侪辈底地位，然而这样做底结果往往是有不便的。像这样的人现代语叫做“宠臣”或“私人”；好像他们之所以能到这种地位仅仅是由于主上底恩意或君臣之间的亲近似的。然而罗马语中的字眼才能算是把这种人底真正用途及其擢升之由表达出来了；罗马语把这种人叫做participes curarum“分优者”；因为真能使君臣之间结如斯之友谊者，正即此事也。我们又可以看到像这样的事情并不限于懦弱易感的君主，即从来最有智有谋的君主，亦往往有与臣下中某人结交，呼之为友，并使旁人亦以君王之友人称之者；君臣之间所用的这种称谓就和普遍私人之间所用的一样。

苏拉，当他为罗马底独裁者的时候，把庞拜（即后来被人称为“伟大的”庞拜者）擢升到很高的地位以至庞拜自诩为苏拉所不及。因为有一次庞拜为他底一位朋友争执政官之职，与苏拉所推举之人竞选，竟而获胜。在苏拉对此表示不满而开始争吵的时候，庞拜简直反唇相向，叫他不要多言，“因为拜朝日的人多过拜夕阳的人”。在恺撒则有代西玛斯·布鲁塔斯，其影响之巨，竟使恺撒在遗嘱中立他为次承继人，仅次于恺撒底孙外甥。而这人也就是有能力诱致恺撒于死地的人。因为在恺撒为了一些不祥的预兆，尤其是克尔坡尼亚底一场噩梦的原故而想使参议院先行散会，改期再开的时候，布鲁塔斯拉着他底胳膊，轻轻地把他从椅子上拉了起来，并告诉他说，他希望恺撒不要叫参议院散会，等恺撒底夫人做一场好一点的梦之后再行开会。安东尼在一封信里（这封信在西塞罗底攻击演说之一中曾经一字不移地引用过）曾呼代西玛斯·布鲁塔斯为“妖人”，好像他用邪术迷惑了恺撒似的，他底得宠之深可见矣。阿葛瑞帕虽然出身微贱，但是奥古斯塔斯却把他升到很高的地位，以致后来当奥古斯塔斯以他底女儿玖利亚底婚事问麦西那斯的时候，麦西那斯竟敢说“他必须把女儿嫁给阿葛瑞帕，否则就必须把阿葛瑞帕杀了。再没有第三条路可走，因为他把阿葛瑞帕已造就得如此之伟大了”。在泰比瑞亚斯一方面西亚努斯升到很高的位置，竟至他们二人被称并被认为一双朋友。泰比瑞亚斯在致西亚努斯的一封信里写道：“为了我们底友谊的原故，我没有把这些事对你隐瞒”，并且整个的参议院给“友谊”特造了一座杂坛（就好像“友谊”是一位女神一样）以表扬他们二人之间的很亲爱的友谊。此类或胜乎此的例子又可于塞普谛米亚斯·塞委拉斯与普劳梯亚努斯底友谊中见之。因为塞委拉斯竟强迫他底儿子娶普劳梯亚努斯之女为妻；并且往往袒护普劳梯亚努斯种种欺凌皇子的行为；他并且以这样的言辞下诏于参议院：“朕爱其人如此之深，愿其能后朕而死也”。假如这些君王是图拉真或马喀斯·奥瑞利亚斯一流的，那末我们可以认为像上述的举动乃是出自十分良善的心田的；但是这些君王都是很有智谋，精神强健而严厉，并且是极端爱己的，然而他们竟然如此，这就可以证明他们底幸福虽然已达人间之极峰，但是他们对之，仍不满意，觉得若无朋友使之圆满，则这种幸福终是残缺不全也。犹有甚者，这些君主都是有妻有子有甥侄的人，然而这些人竟不能使他们有朋友之乐.

It is not to be forgotten, what Comineus observeth of his first master, Duke Charles the Hardy,namely, that he would communicate his secrets with none; and least of all, those secrets which troubled him most.  Whereupon he goeth on, and saith that towards his latter time, that closeness did impair³¹, and a little perish his understanding. Surely Comineus mought have made the same judgment³² also, if it had pleased him, of his secondmaster, Lewis the Eleventh, whose closeness was indeed his tormentor³³.  The parable³⁴ of Pythagoras is dark, but true; Cor ne edito; Eat not the heart. Certainly, if a man would give it a hard phrase,those that want friends, to open themselves unto,are carnnibals of their own hearts.  But one thing is most admirable (wherewith I will conclude this first fruit of friendship), which is, that this communicating of a man's self to his friend, works two contrary effects; for it redoubleth joys, and cutteth griefs in halves.  For there is no man, that imparteth his joys to his friend, but he joyeth the more; and no man that imparteth his griefs to his friend, but he grieveth the less.  So that it is in truth, of operation upon a man's mind, of like virtue³⁵ as the alchemists use to attribute to their stone, for man's body; that it worketh all contrary effects, but still to the good and benefit of nature.  But yet without praying in aid of alchemists, there is a manifest image of this, in the ordinary course of nature.  For in bodies, union strengtheneth and cherisheth any natural action; and on the other side, weakeneth and dulleth any violent impression: and even so it is of minds. 
 
The second fruit of friendship, is healthful and sovereign for the understanding, as the first is for the affections.  For friendship maketh indeed a fair day in the affections, from storm and tempests; but it maketh daylight in the understanding, out of darkness, and confusion of thoughts.  Neither is this to be understood only of faithful counsel, which a man receiveth from his friend; but before you come to that, certain it is, that whosoever hath his mind fraught³⁶ with many thoughts, his wits band understanding do clarify and break up, in the communicating and discoursing³⁷ with another; he tosseth his thoughts more easily; he marshalleth them more orderly, he seeth how they look when they are turned into words: finally, he waxeth wiser than himself; and that more by an hour's iscourse, than by a day's meditation³⁸.  It was well said by Themistocles, to the king of Persia, That speech was like cloth of Arras, opened and putabroad; whereby the imagery doth appear infigure; whereas in thoughts they lie but as in packs.  Neither is this second fruit of friendship, in opening the understanding, restrained only to such friends as are able to give a man counsel; (they indeed are best;) but even without that, a man learneth of himself, and bringeth his own thoughts  to light, and whetteth his wits as againsta stone, which itself cuts not.  In a word, a man were better relate himself to a statua, or picture ,han to suffer his thoughts to pass in smother³⁹. 
                        
 康明奈亚斯关于他底第一位主上，“勇敢的”查理公爵，所说的话是不可忘的，就是，他不肯把他底秘密与任何人共之，尤其不肯把那最使他为难的秘密告人。于是康明奈亚斯继续又说道：“到公爵底末日将近的时候这种秘而不宣的性情不免稍损他底理智”。其实，如果康明奈亚斯乐意的话，他对于他底第二位主上，路易十一，也大可下同样的断语，因为路易十一底好隐秘确是他自己底灾星。毕达哥拉斯底格言是难解而真确的；他说，“不要吃你底心”。确实地；说得厉害一点，没有朋友可以向之倾诉心事的人们可说是吃自己底心的野人。有一件事却是很值得惊奇的（我把它说了出来就此结束关于友谊底第一种功效的话语），那就是，一个人向朋友宣泄私情的这件事能产生两种相反的结果，它既能使欢乐倍增，又能使忧愁减半。因为没有人不因为把自己底乐事告诉了朋友而更为欢欣者，也没有人因为把自己底忧愁告诉了朋友而不减忧愁者。所以就实际的作用而言，友谊之于人心其价值真有如炼金术士常常所说的他们底宝石之于人身一样；这宝石，依术土们底话，是能产生种种互相反对的效力，然而总是有利于天禀的。然而，即令不借助于术士，在普通的自然现象中，也可以看到这种情形很明显的肖象。因为物体相合则足以助长并滋养任何天然的作用，又可以削弱并挫折任何暴烈的外来打击也：物体如此，人心亦是如此。

友谊底第二种功用就在它能卫养并支配理智，有如第一种功用之卫养并支配感情一样。因为友谊在感情方面使人出于烈风暴雨而入于光天化日，而在理智方面又能使人从黑暗和乱想入于白昼也。这不仅指一个人从朋友处得来的忠谏而言；即在得到这个之前，任何心中思虑过多的人，若能与旁人通言并讨论，则他底心智与理解力将变为清朗而有别；他底思想底动作将更为灵活；其排列将更有秩序；他可以看出来把这些思想变成言语的时候它们是什么模样；他终于变得比以往的他聪明，而要达到这种情形，一小时底谈话比一天底沉思为效更巨——这些都是没有疑义的。塞密斯陶克立斯对波斯王的话说得极是。他说：“言语有如张挂展览的花毡，其中的图形都是显明的；而思想则有如卷折起来的花毡”。友谊底这第二种功用（就是启发理智），也不限于那些能进忠言的朋友（他们当然是最好的朋友了），即令没有这样的朋友，一个人也能借言谈底力量自己增长知识，把自己底思想使之明白表现，并且把自己底机智磨厉得更为锋利，如磨刃于石，刃锐而石固不能割也。简言之，一个人，与其使他底思想窒息而灭，毋宁向雕像或图画倾诉一切之为愈也。

 Add now, to make this second fruit of friendship complete, that other point, which lieth more open, and falleth within vulgar observation; which is faithful counsel from a friend.  Heraclitus saith well in one of his enigmas⁴⁰, Dry light is ever the best.  And certain it is, that the light that a man receiveth by counsel from another, is drier and purer, than that which cometh from his own understanding and judgment; which is ever infused, and drenched⁴¹, in his affections and customs.So as there is as much difference between the counsel, that a friend giveth, and that a man giveth himself, as there is between the counsel of a friend, and of a flatterer.  For there is no such flatterer as is a man's self; and there is no such remedy against flattery of a man's self, as the liberty of a friend. Counsel is of two sorts: the one concerning manners, the other concerning business.  For the first,the best preservative⁴² to keep the mind in health, is the faithful admonition of a friend.  The calling of a man's self to a strict account, is a medicine, sometime too piercing and corrosive⁴³.  Reading good books of morality, is a little flat and dead.  Observing our faults in others, is sometimes improper⁴⁴ for our case.  But the best receipt (best, I say, to work, and best to take) is the admonition of a friend. It is a strange thing to behold⁴⁵, what gross errors  and extreme absurdities⁴⁶ many (especially of the greater sort) do commit, for want of a friend to tell them of them; to the great damage both of their fame and fortune: for, as St. James saith, they are as men that look sometimes into a glass, and preently forget their own shape and favor.  As for business, a man may think, if he win, that two eyes see no more than one; or that a gamester seeth always more than a looker-on; or that a man in anger, is as wise as he that hath said over the four and twenty letters; or that a musket⁴⁷ may be shot off as well upon the arm, as upon a rest; and such other fond and high imaginations, to think him self all in all.  But when all is done, the help of good counsel, is that which setteth business straight. And if any man think that he will take counsel, but it shall be by pieces; asking counsel in one business, of one man, and in another business, of another man; it is well (that is to say, better, perhaps, than if he asked none at all); but he runneth two dangers: one, that he shall not be faithfully counselled; for it is a rare thing, except it be from a perfect and entire friend, to have counsel given, but such as shall be bowed and crooked⁴⁸ to some ends, which he hath, that giveth it.  The other, that he shall have counsel given, hurtful and unsafe (though with good meaning), and mixed partly of mischief⁴⁹ and partly of remedy; even as if you would call a physician, that is thought good for the cure of the disease you complain of, but is unacquainted with your body; and therefore may put you in way for a present cure, but overthroweth your health in some other kind; and so cure the disease, and kill the patient.  But a friend that is wholly acquainted with a man's estate, will beware, by furthering any present business, how he dasheth upon other inconvenience.  And therefore rest not upon scattered counsels; they will rather distract and mislead, than settle and direct. 

 现在，为充分说明友谊底这第二种功用起见，我们再一谈那个显而易见的、流俗之人也可以注意到的那一点，就是朋友底忠言。赫拉克里塔斯在他底隐语之一中说得很好，“干光永远最佳”。一个人从另一个人的净言中所得来的光明比从他自己底理解力，判断力中所出的光明更是干净纯粹，这是无疑的：一个人从自己底理解力与判断力中得来的那种光明总不免是受他底感情和习惯底浸润影响的。因此，在朋友所给的诤言与自己所作的主张之间其差别有如良友底净言与谄佞底建议之间的差别一样。因为谄谀我者无过于我；而防御自谄自谀之术更无有能及朋友之直言者也。诤言共有两种：一是关于行为的，一是关于事业的。说到第一种，最能保人心神之健康的预防药就是朋友底忠言规谏。一个人底严厉自责是一种有时过于猛烈，蚀力过强的药品。读劝善的好书不免沈闷无味。在别人身上观察自己底错误有时与自己底情形不符。最好的药方（最有效并且最易服用的）就是朋友底劝谏。许多人（尤其是伟大的人们）因为没有朋友向他们进忠告的缘故，做出大谬极误的事来，以致他们底名声和境遇均大受损失，这种情形看起来是很可惊异的。这些人是，有如圣雅各所说，“有时看看镜子，而不久就会忘了自己底形貌的”。讲到事业方面，一个人也许以为两只眼所见的并不多于一只眼所见的；或者以为局中人之所见总较旁观者之所见为多；或者以为一个在发怒中的人和一个默数过二十四个字母的人一般地聪明；或者以为一枝旧式毛瑟枪，托在臂上放和托在架上放一样地得力；他可以有许多类此的愚蠢骄傲的妄想，以为自己一身就很够了。然而能使事业趋于正轨者还数忠言。又，假如有人想采纳别人底忠告，而愿意零碎采纳，在某一件事上问某一人，在另一件事上问另一人，这样的办法也好（这就是说，总比他全不问人的或者好一点）；可是他冒着两种危险；一是他将得不到忠实的进言；因为所进的言论必须是来自一位完全诚心的朋友的才好，否则鲜有不被歪屈而倾向于进言人之私利者也。另一种危险是他所得的进言，将为一种有害而不安全的言论（虽然用意是好的）一半是招致祸患的而一半是救济或预防祸患的；有如你生病请医，而这位医生是虽被认为善治你所患的病症，却是不熟悉你底体质的；因此他也许会使你目前的疾病可以痊愈而将危害你健康的另一方面；结果是治了病症而杀了病人。一个完全通晓你底事业境遇的朋友则不然，他将小心注意，以免因为推进你目前的某种事业而使你在别的方面突受打击。所以最好不要依靠零零碎碎的忠告；它们扰乱和误引底可能多于安定和指导底可能也。

 

 After these two noble fruits of friendship (peace in the affections, and support of the judgment), followeth the last fruit; which is like the pomegranate, full of many kernels⁵⁰; I mean aid, and bearing a part, in all actions and occasions.  Here the best way to represent to life the manifold use of friendship, is to cast and see how many things there are, which a man cannot do himself; and then it will appear, that it was a sparing speech of the ancients, to say, that a friend is another himself; for that a friend is far more than himself. Men have their time, and die many times, in desire of some things which they principally take to heart; the bestowing⁵¹ of a child, the finishing of a work, or the like.  If a man have a true friend, he may rest almost secure that the care of those things will continue after him.  So that a man hath, as it were, two lives in his desires.  A man hath a body, and that body is confined to a place; but where friendship is, all offices of life are as it were granted to him, and his deputy.  For he may exercise them by his friend.  How many things are there which a man cannot, with any face or comeliness⁵², say or do himself?  A man can scarce allege⁵³ his own merits with modesty⁵⁴, much less extol⁵⁵ them; a man cannot sometimes brook⁵⁶ to supplicate⁵⁷ or beg; and a number of the like.  But all these things are graceful⁵⁸, in a friend's mouth, which are blushing in a man's own.  So again, a man's person hath many proper relations, which he cannot put off.  A man cannot speak to his son but as a father; to his wife but as a husband; to his enemy but upon terms:whereas a friend may speak as the case requires, and not as it sorteth with the person.  But to enumerate⁵⁹ these things were endless; I have given the rule, where a man cannot fitly play his own part; if he have not a friend, he may quit the stage.

 在友谊底这两种高贵的功效（心情上的平和与理智上的扶助）之后还有那最末的一种功效：这种功效有如石榴之多核。这句话的意思就是朋友对于一个人底各种行为，各种需要，都有所帮助，有所参加也。在这一点上，若要把友谊底多种用途很显明生动地表现出来，最好的方法是计算一下，看看一个人有多少事情是不能靠自己去办理的：这样计算一下之后，我们就可以看得出古人所谓“朋友者另一己身也”的那句话是一句与事实相较还很不够的话；因为一个朋友比较一个人底己身用处还要大得多。人底生命有限，有许多人在没有达到最大的心愿——如子女底婚事，工作之完成，等等——之前就死了。要是一个人有了一位真心的朋友，那末他就大可安心，知道这些事件在他死后还是有人照料的。如此，一个人在完成心愿上简直是有两条性命了。一个人有一个身体，而这个身体是限于一个地方的；但是假如他有朋友，那末所有的人生大事都可算是有人办理了。就是他自己不能去的地方，他底朋友也可以代表他的。还有，有多少事是一个人为了颜面底关系，不能自己说或办的！一个人不能自承有功而免矜夸之嫌，更不用说是不能表扬自己底功绩了；他有时也不能低首下心地去有所恳求；诸如此类的事很多。但是这一切的事，在一个人自己底嘴里说出来未免赧颜的，在朋友嘴里说出来却是很好。类此，一个人还有许多身份上的关系，是他不能弃置不顾的。例如，一个人对儿子讲话，就不能不保持父亲底身份；对妻子讲话就不能不保持丈夫底身份；对仇敌讲话就不能不顾虑自己底体面：但是一个朋友却可以就事论事，而不必顾虑到人底方面。这一类的事情要－－列举出来是说不完的；要之，一个人若是有某种事自己不能很得体地去做时，我对他有一条规则可说，就是，他如果没有朋友的话，那末他只有“下台”之一法
 
 

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