Barack Obama plays bowling¹ on Saturday in Pennsylvania
 
US presidential race hopeful Hillary Rodham Clinton walked somberly into a press conference Tuesday and stood before microphones. Reporters tensed, sensing something big might be afoot.

"This has been a very hard fought race," she said. "We clearly need to do something so that our party and our people can make the right decision. So, I have a proposal."

The tension grew. Reporters shifted in their seats. Was she dropping out of the race? Offering to join rival Barack Obama as his running mate?

April Fools!

"Today, I am challenging Senator Obama to a bowl-off. A bowling night, right here in Pennsylvania. Winner take all. I'll even spot him two frames," she said to relieved laughs from the press.

Obama had disastrous² outing at a Pennsylvania bowling alley³ on Saturday.

"It is time for his campaign to get out of the gutter⁴ and allow all the pins to be counted. I'm prepared to play this game all the way to the tenth frame. When this game is over, the American people will know that when that phone rings at 3 a.m. in the White House, they'll have a president ready to bowl on day one, " Clinton carried on.

"Let's strike a deal and go bowling for delegates. We don't have a moment to spare, because it's already April Fool's Day. Happy April Fool's Day."

 
本周二，美国总统竞选人希拉里•克林顿郑重地走进一个新闻发布会现场，站在麦克风前。记者都很紧张，感觉有什么大事要发生了。

希拉里说：“这场竞赛太艰苦了。看来我们必须得采取点行动，好让我们的党派和人民做出正确的决定。所以我有个提议。”

这时现场的气氛更紧张了，记者们开始有些坐立不安了。难道是要宣布退选？或者是打算作她党内对手奥巴马的竞选搭档（指副总统候选人）？

结果是个愚人节玩笑！

希拉里说：“今天，我要与奥巴马议员打保龄一决雌雄。保龄球之夜，就在宾夕法尼亚，‘胜者全拿’。我甚至还要让他两格”。这时台下的记者们发出一阵放心的笑声。

上周六，奥巴马去宾夕法尼亚州一个保龄球场打球，结果打得一塌糊涂。

希拉里继续说：“现在到了他滑出边沟，让大家来数球瓶的时候了。而我将奋斗到底，努力打进第十格。当这场比赛结束时，美国人民将知道当白宫的电话在凌晨3点响起，他们有一位在上任第一天就准备发球的总统。”

“我们就说定了，为党代表们去打场保龄。我们一刻也不能浪费，现在都到愚人节了。愚人节快乐！”

 
Vocabulary: 

winner-takes-all:美国的“嬴者全嬴”政策；目前除了缅因州和内布拉斯加州，美国其余四十八州均采取“胜者全拿”（winner-take-all）的选举制度。如果某一政党候选人在该州获得的票数高于对手，即可获得该州所有的选举人票。

spot: to give your opponent or the other team an advantage（让步；例如：We spotted⁵ the opposing team two goals. 我们让了对方两个球。）