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The world Alice stepped into was strange and beautiful and unexpected, like a garden glimpsed in a mirror from far away. For some reason she had expected it to be full of flowers— talking flowers with silly personalities1. But this garden was brown and tangled2 instead. Stone statues littered the walkways, many of them broken and overgrown with dead vines. The fountain no longer glittered with sun-speckled water. It was still and empty, covered in a creeping greenish-brown moss3.
"HAAACHOOOOOORRRRRW!" Something bellow-sneezed behind her. Alice whirled around and saw a green pig dash past, its emerald hooves clattering4 on the dusty gravel5 paths. She blinked at its curly, brilliant green tail as it vanished behind a long hedge.
Her eyes fell on a row of flowers, and she jumped. They did have human faces—how had she known they would? But these were not the ones she'd expected somehow. These faces were gaunt and haunted, as if the flowers were starving. Their eyes stared blankly past her, and their petals6 hung limp, with pale, washed-out colors barely visible against the brown and gray backdrop. None of them spoke7 to her, although a couple let their gaze travel slowly across her face, then drift back down to the ground.
Now that Alice was paying closer attention, she could see living things moving all around her. Up in the air, dragonflies the size of horses were doing battle with horseflies the size of dragons and gnats8 that were bigger than any animal she'd ever seen. They swooped9 and zoomed10 toward one another, stinging and buzzing angrily. The weak sun, hidden by a haze11 of gray clouds, barely illuminated12 the blue green bodies of the dragonflies and the iridescent13 wings of all the battling insects.
Alice jumped again as another creature stalked past her—a shabby, thin bird on legs as tall and thin as the stilts14 little boys played with in the alleys15 outside her London home. She saw more birds that looked much the same: shoulders hunched16, drab feathers falling out, knobbly legs that looked too skinny to support even the bird's thin frame.
"Curiouser and curiouser," Alice muttered. This place was familiar and yet … somehow not. It seemed … sadder than she had imagined.
"I told you she's the right Alice," a voice said triumphantly17.
Alice whirled around. A cluster of the oddest creatures stood behind her, all of them staring at her intently. The speaker was the White Rabbit, who stood with his front paws neatly18 tucked into his waistcoat. His long ears and wiggly nose twitched19 as he studied her.
She was getting an equally intense look from the large bird next to the White Rabbit—a dodo bird, if she was not mistaken. He was peering at her through a pair of eyeglasses and leaning on a walking stick.
The rest of the party consisted of one young dormouse in breeches and a pair of very round boys with their arms thrown over each other's shoulders. Words were embroidered20 on their stiffly starched21 white collars. One said dee and the other said dum.
The White Rabbit threw up his hands. "How is that for gratitude23!" he cried. "I've been up there for weeks trailing one Alice after the next! I was almost eaten by other animals! Can you imagine? They go about entirely24 unclothed and they do their … shukm … in public." A full-body shudder25 rippled26 through his white fur. "I had to avert27 my eyes." He touched one paw to his forehead dramatically.
"She doesn't look anything like herself," one of the flowers suddenly offered. A few of the other flowers with human faces perked28 up a little and squinted29 at Alice, who felt rather like a specimen30 under a microscope at this point.
"That's because she's the wrong Alice," the Dormouse said again.
The pair of boys spoke up.
"And if she was, she might be," said the one with Dee on his collar.
"But if she isn't, she ain't," said Dum.
"But if she were so, she would be."
"But she isn't. No-how."
They both shook their round, moonlike faces solemnly.
Alice put her hands on her hips31. "How can I be the ‘wrong Alice' when it's my dream?" she demanded. "And who are you, if I may ask?"
One of the round boys seized her hand. "Oh, I'm Tweedledee, and he's Tweedledum," he rattled32 off quickly.
"Contrariwise," the other piped up, "I'm Tweedledum—he's Tweedledee."
Which didn't give her much of an answer, really.
The Dodo cleared his throat. "We should consult Absolem."
The others all nodded. Even the talking flower's head bobbed up and down. "Exactly," said the flower. "Absolem will know who she is."
Tweedledee offered Alice his arm. "I'll escort you," he offered.
Just as she was about to take it, Tweedledum suddenly seized her elbow and yanked her away. "Hey, it's not being your turn! So unfair!" he insisted.
Alice thought she might split in two in a minute. She wriggled35 free and jumped away. "Are they always this way?" she asked the rabbit.
"Family trait," the White Rabbit answered.
"You can both escort her," he said firmly to the Tweedles.
Shooting daggers36 at each other with their eyes, Tweedledee and Tweedledum each took one of Alice's arms and led her forward. The Dormouse, the Dodo, and the White Rabbit followed close behind.
As they walked through the overgrown garden, Alice could hear the talking flowers whispering about her whenever they passed by.
"It can't be her," murmured a glum-looking daisy.
"She is not even wearing the right dress," complained one of the violets.
Alice peered at the tiger lily as they hurried by. It couldn't look familiar … how silly! All tiger lilies looked the same, surely. And yet there was something about this one, as if they'd met before. How peculiar38 this dream was getting!
"Who is this Absolem?" Alice asked her companions. She couldn't remember dreaming about an "Absolem" before.
"He's wise," said the White Rabbit. "He's absolute."
"He's Absolem," the Tweedles added in unison39, as if that should answer the question. Alice realized she wasn't going to get much more useful information out of them. She'd have to wait until they reached this wise old Absolem.
She blinked, then blinked again. The garden path sloped down a little hill, and slowly—so slowly that at first she hadn't noticed it—they were surrounded by a strange mist. Through the mist she could see that they were wandering into a tall forest, but the trees were not by any means ordinary. Their trunks were fat and pale, and when Alice looked up to find branches, she saw instead a flat brownish gray canopy40 extending out from the top of the trunk in an unbroken, round circle.
"Oh!" she gasped41 softly. They weren't trees … they were mushrooms! She was standing42 in a forest of tall mushrooms, many of them towering high above her head. The earth was spongy and squishy and dark under her shoes.
"Who are you?" intoned a deep voice.
Alice's eyes traveled up the nearest trunk—up and up and up to where the mist was rising in a steady plume43. It wasn't an ordinary mist. It was the smoke from a hookah. And that hookah was currently being smoked by a very large blue caterpillar44.
A shiver danced across Alice's skin. She did remember something about a blue caterpillar. But before she could fit the pieces of her memory together, the White Rabbit pushed her toward the mushroom.
The Caterpillar writhed46 a little, looking displeased47. "You're not Absolem," it pointed48 out. "I'm Absolem. The question is … who are YOU?"
He inhaled49 deeply, then puffed50 a series of smoke rings in her face. Alice coughed and tried to wave the smoke away.
"Alice," she answered when she could breathe again.
"We shall see," the Caterpillar responded skeptically.
"What do you mean by that?" Alice demanded.
All this nonsense about being the wrong Alice was starting to annoy her. "I ought to know who I am!"
"Yes, you ought," said the Caterpillar with a disapproving51 look. "Stupid girl. Unroll the Oraculum," he added commandingly.
The White Rabbit hopped52 over to a nearby toadstool, only as high as Alice's shoulders. He bounced up on his strong back paws and grabbed the ancient parchment lying rolled up on top of it. With a dramatic flourish, he unrolled it.
"The Oraculum," he announced. "Being a Calendrical Compendium53 of Underland."
Alice peered over his shoulder. It was the oddest scroll54. It looked nothing like her neat schoolbooks with their even rows of dates and boring historical facts. But it was clearly a timeline, with important events marked for each day. Every day had a title, but every day also had an odd little illustration next to it … and some of them were moving!
"It's a calendar," Alice guessed.
"Compendium," the Caterpillar corrected her. "It tells of each and every day since the Beginning."
"Today is Griblig Day in the time of the Red Queen," explained the White Rabbit. He pointed with one paw at the illustration for "Griblig Day."
To Alice's surprise, the illustration showed her, the White Rabbit, and all the others peering at the Oraculum—exactly the way they were peering at it that very moment!
Well, that's odd, she thought. More than odd, it's curious. And it makes me curious. How did the parchment know what was going to happen before it happened?
"Show her the Frabjous Day," said the Caterpillar. Its long blue coils rippled as it went back to smoking the hookah.
The White Rabbit flipped55 ahead in the scroll, turning the rolls on either side to advance into the future. Tweedledee was too impatient to wait. He was dancing on his small round feet.
"Sorry?" she said. "Slay a … what?"
He pointed at the Oraculum, and Alice turned slowly to see the illustration on "Frabjous Day." It was one of the moving pictures—unfortunately, since the thing moving in it was one of the most horrible creatures Alice had ever seen. It was as tall as a giraffe with reptilian57 wings, scales, long sharp claws, a pronged tail, and a vest. Not to mention its enormous gnashing teeth and wide, flaming eyes.
In the picture, the Jabberwocky hissed58 furiously at a female knight59 with long blond hair, wearing chain mail, and carrying a shining sword. They fought, blade clashing against claws and scales, and the Jabberwocky shrieked60 with anger.
Tweedledum's pudgy finger poked61 into her view, tapping the illustration of the knight. "Oh, yeah, that being you there with the Vorpal Sword."
"No other swords can kill the Jabberwocky," said Tweedledee. "No-how."
"If it ain't Vorpal, he ain't dead," said Tweedledum.
Alice stared at the image, transfixed. That couldn't be her. She'd never worn chain mail in her life! Let alone lifted a sword! She couldn't even imagine battling a giant monster like that!
The knight in the picture swung her sword, turning her face toward the readers of the scroll. Alice gasped.
It was her. Most unmistakably. And she had bloodlust in her eyes.
爱丽丝进入了一个不同寻常、美轮美奂而又意想不到的世界，从远处看好像一座镜中的花园。不知道为什么，她原本期待这里鲜花遍地——至少会有喋喋不休地对她进行诽谤的花儿，然而这座花园却是乱糟糟的一团，沉闷无比。人行道上到处都是凌乱的石膏像，许多破碎的石膏像上都爬满了毫无生气的藤蔓。喷泉再也喷不出在阳光下闪闪发光的水柱了，空空荡荡、一片沉寂，周身爬满了棕绿色的苔藓。
“阿——嚏——！”什么东西在她身后打了个响亮的喷嚏。爱丽丝转过身，看见一只绿色的猪飞快地从身边跑过，它翠绿色的小蹄子踏在尘土飞扬的碎石路上发出嗒嗒的声响。爱丽丝惊讶地看着它鲜艳卷曲的绿尾巴，直到它渐渐消失在一长排树篱后面。
爱丽丝的目光落到一排花上时，她吓了一跳：这些花儿竟然长着人脸——她怎么知道它们竟会长成这样？但不知为何，这可不是她所期待的花园。这些花儿面色憔悴、焦虑不安，个个似乎都饥肠辘辘。它们茫然的目光从爱丽丝身上飘过，身上的花瓣无精打采地垂着。在昏暗阴沉的背景下几乎都看不见这些褪色的、苍白的花瓣。尽管有些花儿的目光慢慢地从她脸上滑过，但没有一朵花儿跟她讲话，它们都转回去盯着地面。
由于爱丽丝观察得更加仔细，她发现周围所有的生物都在动。天空中马匹大小的蜻蜓正在同飞蜥大小的马蝇和蚊子搏斗，它们比爱丽丝见过的任何动物都要大。它们一会儿朝对手猛扑而去，一会儿急速上升，怒气冲冲地蜇着对方，并发出嗡嗡的声响。被乌云遮住的微弱阳光，几乎无法照亮蜻蜓蓝绿色的身体和混战中所有昆虫彩虹色的翅膀。
另一只动物昂首阔步地从爱丽丝身边走过时，爱丽丝又吓了一跳——这只衣衫褴褛、瘦削不堪的鸟，跟爱丽丝伦敦家门口巷子里那个和她一起玩耍、走起路来一瘸一拐的小男孩一样，又高又瘦。爱丽丝看到其他鸟儿几乎都一个样——高耸的肩膀，几近脱落的毫无光泽的羽毛和骨节分明的腿，那腿细得看起来都无法支撑它们瘦削的身体。
“真是越来越奇怪了。”爱丽丝喃喃自语。这地方看起来很熟悉，但……不知怎么的又不太熟悉。它好像……比爱丽丝想象中的要糟糕得多。
“我都说了她是真的爱丽丝。”一个声音得意扬扬地说。
爱丽丝转过身，一群世界上最奇怪的动物就站在她身后，都目不转睛地盯着她。刚刚说话的是白兔子，它直挺挺地站着，前爪利落地塞在马甲里。当他打量着爱丽丝的时候，长长的耳朵左摇右晃，凸起的鼻子一张一翕。
白兔子身旁的一只大鸟也紧盯着爱丽丝——如果她没认错的话，这是一只渡渡鸟。他透过一副镜片瞅着爱丽丝，身体倚在一根手杖上。
这伙人中还有一只身穿马裤的小睡鼠和一对圆滚滚的、相互搭着肩膀的双胞胎。他们浆洗得板板整整的白色衣领上都绣着字：一个是叮叮，一个是咚咚。
“我可不确定。”睡鼠边说边来回不断地搓着自己的爪子。
白兔子甩着手嚷道：“这就是对我的感谢？我这几个礼拜都在外面奔波，找遍了所有叫爱丽丝的人，还差点被其他动物给吃掉！你们能想象吗？地面上的动物光着身子到处跑，还……当众……大小便。”白兔子说着，全身剧烈颤抖，身上白色的毛发一圈一圈地荡漾开去。“我只得赶紧移开视线。”说完他戏剧性地用爪子捂住自己的眼睛。
“她一点儿也不像爱丽丝本人。”花园里的一朵花突然开口说道。其他一些长着人脸的花儿听后打起精神瞟了她一眼。爱丽丝此时觉得自己就像显微镜下被人研究的标本。
“那是因为她根本就是假的爱丽丝。”睡鼠又说道。
双胞胎兄弟也发话了。
“如果她是，她就是。”衣领上绣着叮叮的男孩说道。
“但如果她不是，她就不是。”咚咚接着说。
“但如果她是，就肯定是。”
“但如果她不是，就绝不是。”
他们严肃地摇了摇自己圆得像月亮的脑袋。
爱丽丝叉着腰，强硬地说：“这是我的梦，我又怎么会是假的爱丽丝？请问你们又是谁？”
其中一个胖小子拉着她的手。“噢，我是叮叮，他是咚咚。”他飞快地说道。
“反过来说，”另一个男孩高声说道，“我是咚咚——他是叮叮。”
这真算不上是一个有用的回答。
渡渡鸟清了清嗓子说：“我们应该去问阿布索伦。”
其他人都赞同地点点头，甚至连喋喋不休的花儿也不断地点头。“对，”一朵花儿说，“阿布索伦知道她是谁。”
叮叮向爱丽丝伸出手臂说：“我护送你去。”
正当爱丽丝准备去拉叮叮的手，咚咚一把拽过她的胳膊将她拉到一边，坚决地说：“喂，还没轮到你呢！真不公平！”
叮叮抓过爱丽丝的另一只胳膊想把爱丽丝拽回去。“喂，放开你的手！”他嚷着。
“你放手！”咚咚呵斥道。
爱丽丝觉得自己很快就要被掰成两半了，她挣脱束缚跳到一旁。“他俩总是这样吗？”她问白兔子。
“家族毛病。”白兔子回答。
“你俩一起护送她吧。”白兔子坚定地说。
叮叮和咚咚彼此怒目而视，各自拉着爱丽丝的胳膊领着她往前走。睡鼠、渡渡鸟和白兔子紧随其后。
他们穿过杂草丛生的花园，每次经过这里爱丽丝都能听到喋喋不休的花儿在低声谈论她。
“不可能是她。”一株郁郁寡欢的雏菊低声说。
“她看起来一点儿也不像爱丽丝。”一株枯萎的卷丹百合附和道。
“她甚至都没穿那件衣服。”一株紫罗兰抱怨道。
当他们匆匆经过时，爱丽丝仔细地看着那株卷丹百合。它看起来不太普通……多傻啊！毫无疑问，所有的卷丹百合看起来都是一个样。但这株卷丹百合有点不一样，似乎她们以前见过。这梦也太奇怪了吧！
“谁是阿布索伦？”爱丽丝问身边的同伴。她不记得自己以前梦到过一个叫“阿布索伦”的家伙。
“他是智者，他是权威。”白兔子回答。
“他是阿布索伦。”双胞胎兄弟齐声补充道，好像这个答案应该能回答她的问题。爱丽丝知道自己不会从他们那得到更多有用的信息，所以她宁愿等，等到他们见到老智者阿布索伦。
爱丽丝眨了眨眼，又眨了眨眼。花园的小径向下延伸到一座小山丘，慢慢地，慢到以至于爱丽丝一开始压根就没注意到——他们已经被迷雾包围了。透过迷雾爱丽丝看见他们正信步走向一片高大的树林，但这些可绝不是普通的树。它们的树干粗大却苍白，当爱丽丝抬头寻找树枝时，看见的却是扁平的棕灰色树冠。这些完好无缺的圆形树冠从树干顶端向四周延伸开来。
“噢！”爱丽丝惊讶地倒吸一口气。它们不是树……是蘑菇！她正站在一片高大的蘑菇林里，许多蘑菇都高高耸立在她头顶。她脚下黑色的土壤松软又黏稠。
“你是谁？”一个低沉的声音问道。
爱丽丝顺着声音朝上看着离她最近的树干——向上，再向上，直到那冒着团团迷雾的地方。这可不是普通的迷雾，它是从水烟袋里冒出来的烟雾，抽着水烟袋的正是一条巨大的蓝毛虫。
爱丽丝浑身颤抖。她的确记得有只蓝毛虫，但还没等她把零散的记忆拼凑完整，白兔子就将她推向了那棵蘑菇。
“嗯……”爱丽丝结结巴巴地说，“阿布索伦？”
蓝毛虫微微扭动了一下身子，看起来不太高兴。“你不是阿布索伦，”蓝毛虫指出，“我才是，我问的是……你，是谁? ”
他深深地吸了口烟，然后朝爱丽丝脸上吐出一连串的烟圈。爱丽丝被呛得咳了起来，试图将烟挥散。
“爱丽丝。”当她能重新呼吸的时候，回答道。
“我们很快就能知道了。”蓝毛虫怀疑地回应她。
“你这话是什么意思？”爱丽丝质问蓝毛虫。
那些关于她是假爱丽丝的无稽之谈逐渐让她非常恼火。“我当然知道我是谁！”
“是，你知道！”蓝毛虫带着不满的表情说。“傻姑娘！打开神谕。”蓝毛虫又命令道。
白兔子跳到附近一朵只有爱丽丝肩膀那么高的菌盖上，用强劲的后腿向上一蹬，就抓住了顶上那张卷起来的古老的羊皮纸。然后夸张地伸手一抖，羊皮纸就打开了。
蓝毛虫对大家说：“这是神谕，它是我们地下世界的纪年表。”
爱丽丝站在蓝毛虫后面盯着神谕。这是最奇怪的卷轴，它看起来一点儿也不像她那干净的教科书，只有整齐排列的时间和无聊的历史事实。但显然它是一个纪年表，上面记载了每一天发生的重要事件。每一天都配有一个标题，旁边还附了一幅奇怪的小插图……其中有些竟然会动！
“这是日历。”爱丽丝猜测道。
“这是纪年表 ，”蓝毛虫更正道，“它记载了有史以来每一天发生的每一件事。”
“今天是红皇后的格瑞布琳日。”白兔子一边解释一边伸出爪子指着“格瑞布琳日”那张插图。
让爱丽丝大吃一惊的是：插图描述的是自己、白兔子还有其他同伴凝视着神谕的场景——恰恰就是此时此刻他们所处的情形！
好吧，这太奇怪了，爱丽丝心想。何止是奇怪，应该说是离奇古怪。而且它激发了我的好奇心：这张羊皮纸怎么能预知还未发生的事情呢？
“给她看看辉煌之日。”蓝毛虫说。在他说完话缩回去吸水烟袋时，长长的蓝色身体上涌出一层层褶皱。
白兔子一蹦一跳地来到卷轴前，把它向两边展开，纪年表进入未来时间。叮叮等得都不耐烦了，他踮着圆圆的小脚蹦跶了起来。
“噢，对了，辉煌之日就是你斩杀炸脖龙的那一天。”白兔子告诉爱丽丝。
“等等，”爱丽丝说，“斩杀……什么？”
白兔子指着神谕，一脸茫然的爱丽丝慢慢地转过头看着“辉煌之日”那幅插图。这是一幅活动的画面——不幸的是，画面中正在移动的东西是爱丽丝见过的最恐怖的怪物。它和长颈鹿一样高，有着爬虫类的翅膀和鳞片、锋利的长爪子和分了叉的尾巴，还穿着一件背心。这些都已经够吓人的了，更不用提它因愤怒而咬得死死的大牙和瞪得大大的火红的眼睛。
画面中，炸脖龙对一个长着金色长发，身披盔甲，手持亮剑的女骑士发出愤怒的嘶嘶声。他们正在激烈地搏斗，利剑和炸脖龙的爪子、鳞片相互摩擦发出铿锵的碰撞声，它愤怒地尖叫起来。
咚咚粗短的手指进入了她的视野，轻轻拍着插图中的女骑士，说：“噢，对！这就是手持屠龙剑的你！”
“其他剑杀不了炸脖龙，”叮叮说，“绝对不行！”
“如果不是屠龙剑，炸脖龙就死不了。”咚咚说。
爱丽丝呆呆地盯着那幅插图。那不可能是她。她从来都没穿过盔甲！更别说手持利剑了！她甚至无法想象要同那样一只巨大的怪物搏斗！
插图中的女骑士挥着手中的剑，转身看着面对卷轴的观众。爱丽丝惊讶得倒吸了一口气。
就是她！千真万确！插图中，她的眼里闪烁着嗜血的光芒。
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