Joke: The Bad Hand Job_愚人笑话

Joke: The Bad Hand Job

文章来源：文章作者：发布时间：2007-09-22 06:44 字体： [大中小]　进入论坛

(单词翻译:双击或拖选)

A guy has been asking the prettiest girl in town for a date and finally she agrees to go out with him.

He takes her to a nice restaurant, buys her a fancy dinner with expensive wine and on the way home he pulls over to the side of the road in a secluded¹ spot.

They start necking and he's getting pretty excited. He starts to reach under her skirt and she stops him, saying she's a virgin² and wants to stay that way.

"Well, OK," he says, "how a bout³ a blow job?"

"EEEEyyyyyyeeeew!" she screams. "I'm not putting that thing in my mouth!"

He says, "Well then, how about a hand job?"

"I've never done that," she says. "What do I have to do?"

"Well," he answers, "remember when you were a kid and you used to shake up a Coke bottle and spray your brother with it?"

She nods.

"Well, it's just like that."

So he pulls it out and she grabs hold of it and starts shaking it. A few seconds later, his head flops⁴ back on the headrest, his eyes close, snot starts to run out of his nose, wax blows out of his ears and he screams out in pain.

"What's wrong?!" she cries out.

"TAKE YOUR THUMB OFF OF THE END!!!"

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收听单词发音

1 secluded
adj.与世隔绝的；隐退的；偏僻的v.使隔开，使隐退( seclude的过去式和过去分词)
参考例句：
Some people like to strip themselves naked while they have a swim in a secluded place. 一些人当他们在隐蔽的地方游泳时，喜欢把衣服脱光。来自《简明英汉词典》 This charming cottage dates back to the 15th century and is as pretty as a picture, with its thatched roof and secluded garden. 这所美丽的村舍是15世纪时的建筑，有茅草房顶和宁静的花园，漂亮极了，简直和画上一样。来自《简明英汉词典》

2 virgin
n.处女，未婚女子；adj.未经使用的；未经开发的
参考例句：
Have you ever been to a virgin forest?你去过原始森林吗？ There are vast expanses of virgin land in the remote regions.在边远地区有大片大片未开垦的土地。

3 bout
n.侵袭，发作；一次(阵，回)；拳击等比赛
参考例句：
I was suffering with a bout of nerves.我感到一阵紧张。 That bout of pneumonia enfeebled her.那次肺炎的发作使她虚弱了。

4 flops
n.失败( flop的名词复数 )v.（指书、戏剧等）彻底失败( flop的第三人称单数 )；（因疲惫而）猛然坐下；（笨拙地、不由自主地或松弛地）移动或落下；砸锅
参考例句：
a pair of flip-flops 一双人字拖鞋 HPC environments are often measured in terms of FLoating point Operations Per Second (FLOPS) . HPC环境通常以每秒浮点运算次数(FLOPS)加以度量。来自互联网

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