A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope propped¹ up prominently on the center of the bed.

It was addressed, DAD

With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice-even with all her piercing, tattoos², and her tight Motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion dad, she's pregnant and Joan said that we will be very happy.

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your loving son,
Jon

PS - Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tyler's house. My report card is in my desk drawer. Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life. Call me when it's safe to come home .

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