A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch¹（门廊） .

I couldn't help noticing² how happy you look, she says. What's your secret³ for a long, happy life⁴?

I smoke three packs⁵ a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, ever⁶ exercise.

Wow, that's amazing⁷, says the woman. How old are you?

Twenty-six.

一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。

我无意中发现，你是多么幸福，那女士说。你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么？

我每天抽三包烟，每周喝一箱威士忌，吃高脂肪食品，而且从来不曾锻炼。

哦，真神奇，女士说。你高寿？

二十六。