如何克服“好斗”的恐惧
文章来源: 文章作者: 发布时间:2008-12-15 01:20 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
(单词翻译:双击或拖选)

担心自己表示不同意见会被别人认为是好斗?其实是你担心过头了。只要你是礼貌的方式,就不必要担心这个。要记住,人们是以你一贯的处事之道来解读你的,而不是仅凭一次不同意见。

3: Because I am nervous about appearing aggressive I may be too passive in my interactions.

因为我担心自己会表现出“好斗”,所以在交往中,我可能会过于被动

Addresses the fear of being seen as aggressive

如何克服对被视作“好斗”的恐惧

In my research I’ve found that many people who lack assertiveness2 are afraid of being seen as aggressive or arrogant3. They overcompensate and end up on the passive end of the spectrum4. We want you to be assertive1, which is in the middle and is very different from being aggressive. 在我的研究中,我发现许多缺乏主张力的人都是因为害怕被人们认为“好斗”或“高傲”。为了避免让自己表现得如此,结果他们走向了另一个极端。我们想让你具有主张力,这是中性的,和“好斗”非常地不同。

Remember that the majority of the impact of communication is how you say it not what you say. If you project a calm and friendly demeanor5 it is unlikely that you will be seen as aggressive. Remember also that people interpret you in relation to the image they already have of you. If you are typically friendly and thoughtful people will interpret your behaviors in line with this view. 记住沟通的主要影响力在于说话方式而不是内容。如果你的举止镇定、友好,那么就不可能被视为“好斗”。 还要记住,人们是通过他们对你已有的形象来解读你。如果你通常都是一个友好、处事周道的人,那么人们会用和这一观念一致的方式来解释你的行为。

You can assertively6 make requests and deliver negative feedback, without being aggressive. When you’re aggressive you disrespect others’ communication by interrupting, demeaning, or criticizing them. When you are assertive you give your opinion and make your request in a way that everyone benefits. 你可以果断地提出请求、给出消极的反馈,而不表现得“好斗”。在“好斗”时,你会去打断对话、贬低或批评对方,表现得不尊重对方;在你表现主张时,你表达的是你的观点,提出的是人人都受益的请求。



点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 assertive De7yL     
adj.果断的,自信的,有冲劲的
参考例句:
  • She always speaks an assertive tone.她总是以果断的语气说话。
  • China appears to have become more assertive in the waters off its coastline over recent years.在近些年,中国显示出对远方海洋的自信。
2 assertiveness tyJzon     
n.过分自信
参考例句:
  • Her assertiveness was starting to be seen as arrogance. 她的自信已开始被认为是自负了。
  • Role playing is an important element in assertiveness training. 在果敢自信训练班上,角色扮演是个重要内容。
3 arrogant Jvwz5     
adj.傲慢的,自大的
参考例句:
  • You've got to get rid of your arrogant ways.你这骄傲劲儿得好好改改。
  • People are waking up that he is arrogant.人们开始认识到他很傲慢。
4 spectrum Trhy6     
n.谱,光谱,频谱;范围,幅度,系列
参考例句:
  • This is a kind of atomic spectrum.这是一种原子光谱。
  • We have known much of the constitution of the solar spectrum.关于太阳光谱的构成,我们已了解不少。
5 demeanor JmXyk     
n.行为;风度
参考例句:
  • She is quiet in her demeanor.她举止文静。
  • The old soldier never lost his military demeanor.那个老军人从来没有失去军人风度。
6 assertively 96ff1844fcdd1810e172c71a22ee838b     
断言地,独断地
参考例句:
  • Using the right body language helps you communicate more assertively. 使用正确的肢体语言会帮助你更有主张力的交流。
  • Learning to communicate assertively involves learning to be honest, open and direct. 果敢自信的交往方式的学习包括做到为人诚实、坦率和直言不讳。
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