A police officer attempts to stop a car for speeding and the guy gradually¹ increases his speed until he's topping 100 mph. He eventually realizes he can't escape and finally pulls over.

The cop² approaches the car and says, "It's been a long day and my tour is almost over, so if you can give me a good excuse for your behavior, I'll let you go."

The guy thinks for a few seconds and then says, "My wife ran away with a cop about a week ago. I thought you might be that officer trying to give her back!"

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