Question and answer jokes |
文章来源： 文章作者： 发布时间：2007-01-17 08:17 字体： [ 大 中 小] 进入论坛 |
(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
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Q: What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in wet cement? A: Not enough cement. Q: Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called "Divorced Barbie"?
A: Yeah, it comes with half of Ken's things and alimony.
Q: What's the problem with lawyer jokes?
A: Lawyer's don't think they're funny, and no one else thinks they're jokes.
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur1, two to research precedents2, one to dictate3 a letter, one to stipulate4, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose5, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.
Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?
A: In the cemetery6.
Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?
A: At the city morgue.
Q: What's the difference between a porcupine7 and a Mercedes Benz full of lawyers?
A: The porcupine has pricks8 on the outside.
点击  收听单词发音
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1
demur
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| v．表示异议，反对 |
参考例句： |
- Without demur, they joined the party in my rooms. 他们没有推辞就到我的屋里一起聚餐了。
- He accepted the criticism without demur. 他毫无异议地接受了批评。
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2
precedents
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| 引用单元； 范例( precedent的名词复数 )； 先前出现的事例； 前例； 先例 |
参考例句： |
- There is no lack of precedents in this connection. 不乏先例。
- He copied after bad precedents. 他仿效恶例。
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3
dictate
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| v.口授；(使)听写；指令，指示，命令 |
参考例句： |
- It took him a long time to dictate this letter.口述这封信花了他很长时间。
- What right have you to dictate to others?你有什么资格向别人发号施令？
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4
stipulate
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| vt.规定，（作为条件）讲定，保证 |
参考例句： |
- International rules stipulate the number of foreign entrants.国际规则规定了外国参赛者的人数。
- Some manufacturers stipulate the price at which their goods are to be sold.有些制造商规定出售他们生产的商品的价格。
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5
depose
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| vt.免职；宣誓作证 |
参考例句： |
- The witness is going to depose.证人即将宣誓做证。
- The emperor attempted to depose the Pope.皇帝企图废黜教皇。
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6
cemetery
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| n.坟墓，墓地，坟场 |
参考例句： |
- He was buried in the cemetery.他被葬在公墓。
- His remains were interred in the cemetery.他的遗体葬在墓地。
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7
porcupine
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| n.豪猪， 箭猪 |
参考例句： |
- A porcupine is covered with prickles.箭猪身上长满了刺。
- There is a philosophy parable,call philosophy of porcupine.有一个哲学寓言，叫豪猪的哲学。
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8
pricks
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| 刺痛( prick的名词复数 )； 刺孔； 刺痕； 植物的刺 |
参考例句： |
- My skin pricks sometimes. 我的皮肤有时感到刺痛。
- You must obey the rule. It is useless for you to kick against the pricks. 你必须遵守规定，对抗对你是无益的。
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