In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin¹ patch at 11:38 p.m. on Friday. Lawrence will be charged with lewd² and lascivious³ behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication⁴ at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided⁵ to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview.

Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged⁶ "need."

"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment⁷. In the process, Lawrence apparently⁸ failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware⁹ of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's just working away at this pumpkin."

Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence. "I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?' He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight in the face and said,

"A pumpkin? Damn, is it midnight already?"

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