Damn dishes
文章来源: 文章作者: 发布时间:2006-09-25 07:12 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
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So there's this guy who meets a girl in a bar. They talk most of the night and arrange to get together the next night for a date. He tells her he'll come by about 7 on his motorcycle that he's buying tomorrow.

So he goes and buys this bike, but it's an older bike. The guy he's buying it from tells him to get some Vaseline to put on the points when it rains to keep them from rusting1. So he stops at the drugstore on the way to this girls house and gets some Vaseline.

He gets to the girls house and is invited in to dinner with her parents and younger sister. His date tells him "We have a rule in this house. Whoever talks first at dinner has to do ALL the dishes." He looks around and there are dishes piled EVERYWHERE, ceiling to floor, new dishes in the shelves cause they buy new ones because no one has talked at dinner for several years. He's thinking "Damn2. I gotta make somebody talk, or I'm gonna get stuck doing all these dishes."

They get to the dinner table and he's trying to think of how to make somebody talk. So, he reaches over and starts playing with his dates panties under the table. Her dad sees this, and is obviously pissed off, but doesn't say a word. (He doesn't want to do these dishes.)

Seeing this isn't working, he picks his date up and lays her up on the table, rips3 her panties off, and starts fuckin. Dad's REAL pissed off now, but still doesn't say anything.

He's thinkin, "Hmmm. Try something else." So he grabs4 Mom, tosses5 her up on the table, goes to work. Dad's mad as HELL now, but still doesn't say anything. This guys gettin desperate, so he grabs little sister.....tosses her up on the table. Dad's REAL pissed off now, looking around the room, trying to find his shotgun.....still not a word, though.

Just then, there's this big clap of thunder outside. The guy remembers the points on the bike, and it's about to rain. He jumps up, grabs the Vaseline. Moving towards the door, he accidently makes eye contact with the Dad. Dad's eyes get big, and he stands up and says, "ALRIGHT!!! I'll do the damn dishes."



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1 rusting 58458e5caedcd1cfd059f818dae47166     
n.生锈v.(使)生锈( rust的现在分词 )
参考例句:
  • There was an old rusting bolt on the door. 门上有一个生锈的旧门闩。 来自辞典例句
  • Zinc can be used to cover other metals to stop them rusting. 锌可用来涂在其他金属表面以防锈。 来自辞典例句
2 damn jnyzC     
int.该死,他妈的;vt.指责,贬斥,诅咒
参考例句:
  • Damn this useless typewriter!这台破打字机真该死!
  • I knew damn well what he was going to say.我非常清楚他要说什么。
3 rips ecb65861cf79554c085f11c2cc643d5c     
v.扯破,撕坏( rip的第三人称单数 );撕成;锯;猛地扯开
参考例句:
  • She rips out at him,\"You're no gentleman.\" 她破口大骂:“你这个人真不象话。” 来自辞典例句
  • That hotel rips off the tourists. 那家旅馆敲观光客的竹杠。 来自辞典例句
4 grabs 63ff862ac9e8bc241ee82db3ae2893d1     
n.试图抓取,有意抢夺( grab的名词复数 )v.抢先,抢占( grab的第三人称单数 );(尤指匆忙地)取;攫取;(尤指自私、贪婪地)捞取
参考例句:
  • The job is up for grabs.Why don't you apply now? 那工作谁都可以争取,你怎么不现在就申请呢? 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • She grabs a stack of baby photos and thrusts them into my hands. 她抓起一沓婴儿照片塞到我手里。 来自辞典例句
5 tosses ecc4558133329e02715734cca187a642     
v.(轻轻或漫不经心地)扔( toss的第三人称单数 );(使)摇荡;摇匀;(为…)掷硬币决定
参考例句:
  • She tosses aside the magazine and rises to follow. 她放下杂志,站起来跟着上去了。 来自辞典例句
  • After a few warm-up tosses, he put the shot 63 feet 6 inches. 几次试掷之后,他把铅球投出六十三英尺六英寸远。 来自辞典例句
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