(sung to the tune1 of "My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean")
My pets were out practicing football.
My frog intercepted2 a pass.
My cat and my dog and my bunny
then tackled him flat on the grass.
My bunny lies over my doggy.
My doggie's on top of my cat.
My kitty is over my froggy,
and that's why my froggy is flat.
CHORUS
Green splat. Green splat.
Oh, that's why my froggy is flat, like that.
Green splat. Green splat.
Oh, that's why my froggy is flat.
My froggy's as flat as a pancake.
A paper-thin froggy's the worst.
He cannot eat flies now for dinner
except when I flatten3 them first.
CHORUS
If you see your pets playing football,
it's best if you bring them inside
or you may end up with a froggy
who's flattened4 and seven feet wide.
CHORUS