聊聊邀请和拒绝的艺术
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(单词翻译:双击或拖选)

    如火的七月,我们的情绪疯狂燃烧。Do your friends sometimes invite you to dinner, a movie, or a party? 面对老外朋友的盛情,你知道怎么接受或者拒绝才算得体吗?Do you know some customs concerning1 invitations in English-speaking countries?

  我心所向处 欣然前往之 Accept

  To accept an invitation, you should thank the inviter for the invitation, and express the pleasure of being invited. 高兴赴约,嘴巴可要甜点哦。

  提出邀请前需要开场白吗?

  People usually do not begin a conversation with an invitation; instead, they preface(做…的开场白) an invitation in some way. 在我们的flash对话中, Latoya 先问小刘周六有没有空(Are you doing anything on Saturday night?),然后她再说出事由 (Al's birthday party) ,并且发出邀请(I hope you can come.)。

  另一种邀请的方式就是放弃开场白,直接提出邀请。It is also possible to state the occasion2 and then invite the listener without checking out whether the listener is free at that particular time (We're having a party at Jean's. Would you like to come? ).?In a sense the second way is better in that it states the occasion first and allows the listener to decide whether to accept the invitation or not.

  所以说,是否需要开场白还是由你自己来决定。

  用于非正式场合的表达邀请的方式:

  We are having a dance on Sunday. Will you join us?

  We're going to have a few friends over on Friday and we'd love you to come.

  Are you free on Wednesday? Would you like to go to a concert?

  We're having a meeting tomorrow. We'll be very glad if you can make it.

  接受邀请看似简单,真的是这样吗?

  不是就接受那么简单。First, you should thank the person for the invitation (That's very nice of you. Thank you.) and /or express pleasure at being invited (I'd love to come.) Another step is to get the detail of time and place. (Where is it by the way?)

  邀请你的人告诉你不用买东西,你真的会空手去吗?

  The offer to bring something to a dinner or party is considered good manners, although the host or hostess in most cases will turn it down. (e. g. "Just bring yourself.") However, bringing a small gift is always a very considerate thing to do. 礼多人不怪,小小的一点意思有助于礼尚往来。

  关于要不要送礼物的问题,双方还可以这样表达:

  Offering Responses

  Can I bring anything? No, don't bother. We've got everything here.

  Is there anything I can bring? No, just bring yourself. Thanks, anyway.

  What should I bring? Well, why don't you bring salad?

  Can I bring the wine? Well, thanks, if you'd like to.

        接受or拒绝 这是个问题 Decline3

  You may have other arrangements or simply because you don't like the inviter. In either case, you have to turn down the invitation politely. But how?

  拒绝得漂亮,你做得到吗?

  拒绝得漂亮分四步,你知道吗?

  If an invitation must be refused, it is always wise to turn it down politely.

  拒绝四步曲:

  1 apology 道歉

  2 reason or excuse for refusal4 拒绝的原因

  3 thanks for the invitation 感谢邀请

  4 perhaps a second apology 再次致歉

  当然啦,被拒绝的人也要be very polite in expressing disappointment and understanding,比如说What a pity. Never mind。

  模棱两可的回答可以帮你“逃脱”邀请

  Sometimes you can't decide whether to accept the invitation when invited, or you want to refuse the invitation after you've said you're free at the time the inviter mentioned, it is then necessary to give an indecisive response to the invitation. You can tell the inviter that you have to make sure that you're really available at that time and that you'll tell him or her later. 比如,你可以说Let me check again with Cathy. I'll call you tonight and let you know for sure, OK?

  教你拒绝的话该怎么说

  That's very kind. But I'm afraid I can't go because ...

  I'd love to, but I can't. I must go somewhere else.

  I'm sorry, but I've already arranged to go somewhere.

  Oh, that's a lovely idea but I'm really sorry. I can't go. I can't really afford the time.

  邀请门道多 礼节不可废 Customs

  There are different types of invitations Americans extend5 and there is a lot of cultural information you need know about this social skill. 礼数周到,才不会出丑哦。

  口头邀请还是书面邀请好呢?

  Spoken invitations are fine for most occasions6, but for certain special events, such as weddings, anniversaries7, and baby showers, formal written invitations are traditionally sent. They should be answered in writing and returned to the RSVP address. (RSVP are the initials8 of a French expression that means "Will you please reply?") It is fairly common to send printed "party" invitations for large semi-formal cocktail9 parties. They may say "Regrets only" and give a telephone number at the bottom, which means you call only if you cannot attend.

  对邀请说“不”合适吗?

  In many cultures, it is rude to say directly "No, I can't come." Even if a person knows that he or she cannot accept an invitation, the response might be, "Yes, I'll come." But in America it is OK to turn down an invitation. 如果你对老美说去却不去,老美才会真的生气。 Most Americans would prefer to hear directly "No, I'm sorry, I won't be able to make it."

  But if you can't accept an invitation right away, most Americans would expect you to give a reason for not being able to respond. If you don't give a reason, it can seem like you are not interested in getting together with the person who invited you. Sometimes, after you have written accepting an invitation, something else happens to prevent your going after all. In such a case, you must phone or write immediately to your hostess and explain to her in such a way that she will feel your coming is really impossible. If possible, you should give her the real reason why you cannot come. It is extremely discourteous10 to fail to appear when you have accepted an invitation unless an explanation is given. 如果暂时不能决定是否接受邀请,一定要诚挚地给出理由。可能的话,最好告诉对方真实的原因。

        如果受邀去外面聚会,会有什么问题吗?

  In many instances11 it is the inviter who pays, as one would expect, but in some instances each one pays his or her own check. This is often the case with friends in informal situations, such as "Lets go get a beer" or "Want a cup of coffee?" 朋友间的邀请,一般都是邀请方结帐。

  If you want to invite someone for a meal at a restaurant, be explicit12: "I'd like to take you to..." Americans should be explicit also, but they often assume13 that you know the local customs in the matter. Ask a friend's advice if you are not sure. 如果你不太知道邀请老美吃饭的礼仪,一定要开口去问,不要不懂装懂哦。

  送什么礼物呢?

  In the US, there are no exact rules about gift giving, but there are some general customs. When you're invited to a meal at someone's home or to someone's birthday party, it is a good idea to bring small gifts, although not absolutely necessary. The list below includes occasions when many people give gifts and includes types of things people give. 送什么东西没有一定之规,只有一些习惯可供大家参考。

  场合 礼物

  a meal at someone's home a bottle of wine, flowers,candy

  an overnight14 stay at someone's home an object from your country(for example, Chinese tea, paper-cuts, a set of bamboo chopsticks, a tape of Chinese music)

  friends's birthday, particularly the "big"birthdays(21,25,30,40,50,...) books, records, clothing, decorations for the house, photo albums. (This depends on the person who is giving the gift.)

  weddings item for the home such as dishes, pots, towels, blankets, photo albums

  birth of a baby clothes, toys, stuffed animals, things for the baby's room



点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 concerning rvBzwz     
prep.关于,论及
参考例句:
  • What do you know concerning this?关于这事你知道些什么?
  • Some senior students wrote in asking for information concerning postgraduate studies.一些四年级学生写信询问有关研究生课程的信息。
2 occasion DIAxo     
n.场合,时机,机会,诱因,理由;vt.惹起,引起
参考例句:
  • Her dress was too showy for such a formal occasion.在如此正式的场合,她的服装过分华丽了。
  • Her tears were fought back on such an occasion.在这种场合下她忍住了眼泪。
3 decline K9gyw     
n.衰微,跌落,下降;vt.使降低,婉谢;vi.下降,衰落,偏斜
参考例句:
  • I must decline to show favour to any of the candidates.我必须拒绝偏袒任何一位候选人。
  • The birthrate is on the decline.出生率在下降。
4 refusal SUWxR     
n.拒绝
参考例句:
  • He persisted in his refusal to pay the money.他坚持拒绝付钱。
  • Our offer was met with a firm refusal.我们的报价被坚决拒绝。
5 extend ZmixQ     
v.伸开;展开,伸展;扩大;加大
参考例句:
  • Can you extend your visit for a few days more?你能把你的访问再延长几天吗?
  • The examinations extend over two weeks.考试持续两个星期。
6 occasions 11557f17371ac4f35f50715ad4a32024     
n.机会( occasion的名词复数 );时刻;原因;需要
参考例句:
  • The prosecution stated that intercourse had occurred on several occasions. 控诉方称发生过数次性交。
  • He has been late on numerous occasions. 他已经迟到过无数次了。
7 anniversaries 8a51cb4d63479e1db02e583953704257     
n.周年纪念( anniversary的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • Why don't you include the anniversaries of the Yellow Emperor's birth and death? 为什么不连黄帝的生日死日都算在里面?” 来自汉英文学 - 围城
  • Men is forgetful when it comes to birthdays and anniversaries. 对于生日、周年纪念这些事情,男人总是那么健忘。 来自互联网
8 initials qquzAi     
n.首字母,姓名
参考例句:
  • a glass tankard with his initials etched on it 刻有他姓名首字母的玻璃大酒杯
  • All the towels were personalized with their initials. 所有毛巾上都标有物主姓名的首字母。
9 cocktail Jw8zNt     
n.鸡尾酒;餐前开胃小吃;混合物
参考例句:
  • We invited some foreign friends for a cocktail party.我们邀请了一些外国朋友参加鸡尾酒会。
  • At a cocktail party in Hollywood,I was introduced to Charlie Chaplin.在好莱坞的一次鸡尾酒会上,人家把我介绍给查理·卓别林。
10 discourteous IuuxU     
adj.不恭的,不敬的
参考例句:
  • I was offended by his discourteous reply.他无礼的回答使我很生气。
  • It was discourteous of you to arrive late.你迟到了,真没礼貌。
11 instances 6fa9325472628103b7299e0e03a3cb93     
n.例子,实例( instance的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • The report highlights a number of instances of injustice. 这篇报道重点列举了一些不公正的实例。
  • I can cite quite a few instances to illustrate. 我可以举出好几件事来说明。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
12 explicit IhFzc     
adj.详述的,明确的;坦率的;显然的
参考例句:
  • She was quite explicit about why she left.她对自己离去的原因直言不讳。
  • He avoids the explicit answer to us.他避免给我们明确的回答。
13 assume 6Ouyn     
vt.假装;假定,设想;承担;呈现,采取
参考例句:
  • I assume that he won't cheat you.想来他是不会骗你的。
  • We can't assume anything in this case.在这种情况下我们不可能做出假设。
14 overnight uKmxv     
ad.前一天晚上,一夜间 a.前一天晚上的
参考例句:
  • She stayed overnight in the hotel. 她在旅馆过了一夜。
  • Our success is not won overnight. 我们的成功不是一夜之间得来的。
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