Topic:Best Ideas

 

Present your perspective on the issue below, using relevant reasons and/or examples to support your views.

"The best ideas arise from a passionate¹ interest in commonplace things."

 

SAMPLE-1 (score 6)

Even the most brilliant thinkers, from Socrates to Satre, live lives in time. A childhood, an adolescence², an adulthood³; these are common to me and you as well as the greatest writers. Furthermore, many of the great thinkers we esteem⁴ in our Western culture lived somewhat unevetful lives. What distinguished⁵ their life from say a common laborer⁶ was their work. Therefore, what provided the grist for their work? One might say that they were brilliant and this alone was sufficient to distinguish their lives from the masses. Intellect alone can not devise situations or thoughts from no where; there must be a basis and that basis is most common, if not always, observation of the common, of the quotidian⁷. Critics of this idea may argue that these thinkers were products of fine educations and were well schooled in the classics. This, they may point to, is the real basis for their knowledge. I would agrue that although it may be a benefit to study classics and be well schooled in diverse disciplines, these pursuits merely refine and hone an ability each and every person has, the ability to study human nature. Where best to study human nature than in the day to day routine each one of us can witness in him or herself or those around us.

 

I propose that the two best disciplines to understand this power of the commonplace and its ability to cause a groundswell of thought are philosophy and literature. Every school of philosophy, from the Greeks to our day, share a common mission or intent and that is to understand and explain human existence, with all of its concommitant features. Generally speaking, the Greek philosophers, epitomized in Aristotle, attempted to set down rules for human behavior founded on logic⁸. These rules applied⁹ not only to the rare forms of human behavior but largely focused on the more mundane¹⁰ motions of daily life. Many of Aristotle's rules were based on his observations of others as well as himself. Contrast this venture with the existentialists of our century who attempted to look behind the real motivations of human behavior as well understand man's relation to the Universe. To do this, what did these philosophers do? They studied those around them; they submerged themselves in the commonplace, in cities with hordes¹¹ of annonymous people. While the existentialists, as well those philosophers before, exploited their uncommon¹² eduation and intellect, the basis for their movement was ordinary human behavior and existence.

 

Finally, literature is similar to philosophy in that it seeks to explain and understand human behavior and therefore rooted in the commonplace. Nevertheless, its relative strength over philosophy is literature's ability to emotionally and spiritually move the reader through the use of contrived¹³ situations and fictional¹⁴ characters. It can do this when even the central theme of a piece maybe love between a man and a woman (e.g.commonplace). Literature also distinguishes itself from philosophy in that the breadth of the fiction may be huge. The plot and the detail can be quite ordinary or fanatastic. However, this does not mean that the central themes of all literature, whether ordinary or fantastic, deal with human beings and the problems they find in the world, something which we all share.

 

In conclusion, I hope it has been shown that a passionate desire to understand and explain human behavior, the significance of our existence and deal constructively¹⁵ with the challanges of life are the centerpieces of at least in two of the most influential¹⁶ areas in human thought. What is more commonplace than the existence of man.

 

 

COMMENTARY

This essay sustains a well-focused and insightful analysis of the issue.  Beginning with the observation that the greatest thinkers "live lives in time," the writer reasons that the great thinkers develop their ideas through observation of common occurrences and everyday reality.  One of the strengths of this essay is the way in which it thoughtfully considers the opposing claim: that great thinkers are primarily the product of fine education, and that, being "well schooled in the classics," they are far removed from everyday life.  The writer notes that, while it "may be a benefit to study classics," it is nevertheless true that being "well schooled in diverse disciplines" will simply "refine and hone an ability to study human nature" in its everyday manifestations¹⁸.  This observation is indicative of the writer's sophisticated grasp of the complexities¹⁹ of the issue.

 

The writer goes on to demonstrate the intellectual "power of the commonplace" by skillfully developing two compelling examples from academic life: philosophy and literature.  Aristotle is cited as a philosopher who studied the "more mundane motions of daily life."  Similarly, the writer explains, twentieth-century existentialists, in attempting to understand man's relation to the universe, found inspiration in the commonplace.

 

Another strength in this essay is the way it introduces an idea and then builds on that idea as the argument unfolds.  For instance, in a discussion of the existentialists in the second paragraph, the writer expands on an earlier point about "thinkers" in general: the existentialists may have "exploited their uncommon education and intellect," but the "basis for their movement was ordinary human behavior and existence."  It is logical connections such as these that make for a coherent and well-focused discussion.

 

The writer uses language fluently and controls sophisticated syntax throughout the essay: "I would argue that although it may be a benefit to study classics and be well schooled in diverse disciplines, these pursuits merely refine and hone an ability each and every person has, the ability to study human nature."

 

This is not a flawless paper: word choice, for example, is not always precise.  But the essay's cogent²⁰ analysis, effective organization, and sophisticated sentence structure merit a solid score of 6.

 

 

 

 

SAMPLE-2 (score 5)

I can agree with the statement above that, "The best ideas arise from a passionate interest in commonplace things. "  The statement  is an accurate description of how many people form great ideas from ordinary things in life. Sports are all great ideas that are made from commonplace things.  What makes sports some of the best ideas is not what they began as but what they evolved into.

 

All athletic²¹ competitions began from commonplace things being  brought together for the purpose of entertainment, excercise, and social interaction.  Many of the sports people enjoy today are the results of someone's idea creating a new dimension of our lifestyle out of an ordinary object.   Baseball, basketball, and track especially show that the idea of creating something wonderful out of ordinary objects is true.

 

Who would have thought that a stick and a ball would spawn²² into a national pastime, a generational tie between father and son, , a national bond between all races, and  a multibillion dollar industry.  Baseball began when someone decided²³ to throw a ball at someone with a stick and that person with the stick would then try to hit the ball.  What a simple concept and what a wonderful consequence.

 

Today the simple game of baseball is played all over the world.  It is a sport that crosses international divides of religion, race, and politics.  This one simple game, a bat hitting a ball, can bring the whole world together.  But baseball is just one sport that shows the ablitiy to bridge cultural gaps.

 

When Mr. Naismith nailed a peachbasket to a post and threw a ball into it he had no idea that millions of people would be playing his game today.  Mr. Naismith invented the game of basketball, which most everyone has played at some point in his or her life. Throwing a  ball into a basket.  What could be more simple or commonplace than a ball and a peach basket.

 

Today, basketball is the new American pastime.  It replaced baseball because it is cheaper than baseball and it can be played by only one person.  This interest in balls and new uses for them,  as we can see in both baseball and basketball, brought about a huge social phenomena²⁴ of excercise and new social interaction that would bring people together rather than divide them.

 

It doesn't take a ball to create a sport from a commonplace item.  Track and field has no balls used in it, unless you consider the shotput a ball.  The whole sport of track and field is made of simple ideas: running, jumping, and throwing.  Simple but yet it is one of the most watched events worldwide as evidenced by the recent Olympic Games. For example, team relay races consist of four people running around an oval track passing a baton²⁵ to each other.  A baton that is the only object you need to have a relay race,a baton is definetly a commonplace thing.   Yet this event has such stars as Carl Lewis who is known world wide.

 

Sports and how they were created is the epitome²⁶ of the idea that "the best ideas arise form a passionate interest in commonplace things."  What might have seemed boring at the time of hitting a ball, or throwing a ball into a net, or passing a baton are all now events that millions take part in and even more watch.  What makes these ideas great is that they all bring people from different backgrounds together, wether they  intended to or not.

 

 

COMMENTARY

This essay presents a thoughtful, if not very well-developed, discussion of the issue.  Drawing examples from the world of sports, the writer notes that most sports begin with a simple idea.  Baseball, for example, "began when someone decided to throw a ball at someone with a stick and that person with the stick would then try to hit the ball."  From this simple idea came a sport that is played and enjoyed all over the world.  Instead of focusing solely²⁷ on the universal appeal of sports, however, the essay introduces the idea that sports cross "international divides of religion, race, and politics."  This is a perceptive²⁸ idea, but it is not effectively supported or sustained.

 

Throughout the essay, ideas are expressed clearly and word choice is accurate.  Sentences are at times well formed and varied²⁹: "Today the simple game of baseball is played all over the world.  It is a sport that crosses international divides of religion, race, and politics.  This one simple game, a bat hitting a ball, can bring the whole world together."  On the whole, however, this is a 5 essay; it lacks the syntactic sophistication and insightful analysis necessary for a score of 6.

 

 

 

 

SAMPLE-3 (score 4)

While the best ideas do indeed arise from mankind's interest in the commonplace, one must realize that the "commonplace ideas" of our current society continue to evolve at such a rapid rate that we are converging³⁰ on the Twenty-First Century on a wave of thought, ideas, and creation that would surely baffle our forefathers³¹.

 

Simply put, Thomas Jefferson, a brilliant, and progressive thinker, was motivated to create certain societal services that he felt necessary for his time.  Historians report that Mr. Jefferson witnessed a fire which destroyed a man's home.  The victim was left with nothing. Mr.Jefferson, thinking it most unfortunate that a man should lose all his worldly posessions, developed a system of homeowners insurance.  Of course today, we have taken insurance to a new and all-encompassing level.  President Roosevelt adored nature and found great solace³² while visiting Yosemite in Wyoming.  Among his many accomplishments³³, Rooselvelt, our twenty-sixth President, is perhaps best known for his creation of a National Parks Protection program.

 

Over time, the basic needs of mankind have been met due to interests in the commonplace mixed with a progressive trait in man to make things simpler, faster, less expensive, and more gratifying.

 

Today, our "simple thoughts" turn to ideas such as space stations, the technological³⁴ superhighway, and electric vehicles. Sadly, we must also repair much of the fallout from some of our "commonplace" inspired ideas.  For example, evolved transportation has a price as we work to restore our environment.

 

If we are  inspired by the simple motivations, dreams, and tasks of everyday life then we must make a commitment to development our muse³⁵.  Perhaps, the best way to move ahead is to step back; to re-examine and learn from  the art, science, history, love and war of our founding fathers.  Perhaps simple is best.  After all, that's where all the best ideas are born.

 

 

COMMENTARY

This essay presents a competent discussion of the issue.  The opening paragraph introduces two ideas that serve as the primary focus of the essay.  The first is that, as the topic claims, the best ideas are the result of an interest in commonplace things; the second is that our ideas are evolving at a rate of rapidity that would "surely baffle our forefathers."  These two ideas are adequately developed in the course of the paper, but not with enough fluency³⁶ or complexity³⁷ to merit a score of 5.

 

The second paragraph, which considers the way in which ideas arise from an interest in commonplace things, is the most thoroughly³⁸ developed section of the response.  The examples are relevant: Thomas Jefferson, who used everyday observations to come up with the idea of homeowners insurance, and Theodore Roosevelt, whose passionate interest in nature led him to develop the National Parks Protection program.

 

The essay's other area of focus -- the rapid rate at which our ideas change -- is discussed in the third paragraph.  Some good ideas emerge, but, unfortunately, they are not well developed.

 

The essay is organized with an introduction, three supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion.  However, the organization would be stronger if the ideas in one paragraph or section were more clearly connected to the points made in the next section.

 

While there are some errors, they are not severe enough to interfere³⁹ with meaning.  In general, the writer expresses ideas adequately, although at times the wording seems almost haphazard⁴⁰ and therefore a bit confusing: "to re-examine and learn from the art, science, history, love and war of our founding fathers."  For reasons of adequate content and adequate presentation of ideas, this essay received a score of 4.

 

 

 

 

SAMPLE-4 (score 3)

The best ideas arise from a passionate interest in commonplace things.  This is something I learned from everyday experiences.  I always found that the things I decorated my life with abundantly, were the things I treasured most.  It could be a memory, a possesion, or just a view.  It's hard to create a whole picture without first looking at the pieces within it.  My whole life of school and studies have brought me to college and have sparked my interest in applying to a graduate program.  Never before did I realize how these little efforts would create this dream.  In my field of dietetics⁴¹ many would be amazed to find that the food we eat could kill us or help us from disease.

 

There are many times where I'll be looking at the beautiful view, and I just have to go out and enjoy it.  I do this by walking, gardening, or just lying in the grass.  The feeling of the warm sun makes me dream.  I know I'm not the only one who tends to overlook the basic things, like the tree outside that you used to climb, or the food you eat to give you energy and growth.  We just have to take the time from our busy schedules to stop and smell the roses.  Everyone's life is different, with our own experinces and thoughts to motivate us, and no matter who we are, some of the simplest things can bring great achievements in our lives.

 

 

COMMENTARY

This is a limited response; it does not adequately analyze⁴² the issue.  The essay is primarily concerned with discussing the writer's own personal enjoyment⁴³ of commonplace things.  As such it never fully¹⁷ engages the topic's central issue -- the quality of the ideas that come from those commonplace things.  Early in the response, the writer makes the following observation: "I always found that the things I decorated my life with abundantly, were the things I treasured most."  This is typical of the simplistic analysis that characterizes this essay.

 

At the end of the first paragraph, the writer does make some hesitant steps toward a discussion of the ideas that might come from these everyday experiences, mentioning that "in my field of dietetics many would be amazed to find that the food we eat could kill us or help us from disease."  This insight is not adequately developed, however, and, in the second paragraph, the writer returns to a discussion of the idea that one must enjoy the little things in life.  In short, the essay is limited in its development, revealing only a partial understanding of the topic's assertion.

 

In general, the essay displays control of standard written English.  There is not much syntactic variety, but neither are there profound errors.  The essay received the score of 3 because its analysis is simplistic and vague, and its development is limited.

 

 

 

 

SAMPLE-5 (score 2)

The thought of a passion

 

In reading such a passage as the one given to me as an assignment I can't help but think of an analogy that entered my mind.  It is my enduring interest in the field of multimedia⁴⁴.  I say this because of the ideas in which I cultivate as an artist of many media materials such as paints, film, computer animated⁴⁵ software, etc.  Being an expressionist I take in my surroundings and personal experiences from commonplaces and things and tell a story from my perspective using the various tools whether it be computer aided or hand drawn⁴⁶.  My ideas come from people or things because it tells a story.  The story can be abstract, little, big, or even strange.  To record stories like these may spark ideas that may come to me in a domino effect.  It's beautiful] I shared this with you to conclude that sometimes even common things such as a pencil and an empty page can spelllout your fate and unlimited⁴⁷ possibilities when you have a passion or an interest that drives your hunger for innovation.

 

 

COMMENTARY

This essay is seriously flawed in its analysis of the issue.  The writer attempts to address the topic by focusing on his or her interest in "multimedia" art.  Yet, while isolated⁴⁸ words and phrases from the topic appear throughout the essay, the essay never clearly states a position on the issue.  For example, in a discussion of multimedia art, the writer makes the following observation: "Being an expressionist I take in my surroundings and personal experiences from commonplaces and things and tell a story from my perspective using the various tools whether it be computer aided or hand drawn."  The essay circles around the issue, without ever really engaging it.

 

The essay is also marked by serious flaws in language use: inaccurate⁴⁹ word choice ("and tell a story from my perspective using the various tools whether it be computer aided or hand drawn."), unclear pronoun reference ("My ideas come from people or things because it tells a story"), and, in general, a debilitating⁵⁰ lack of clarity and precision.  These errors frequently interfere with meaning, a characteristic of many essays scored 2.

 

 

 

 

SAMPLE-6 (score 1)

The best ideas arise from  a passionate interest in commonplace things because they are from places in the heart.  These iseas draw you to learn more about them.  The idea or ideas have become passionate to you by either personal experience or by observation.  It catches your attention and causes you to examine why or how the occurance /idea exsists. Institentively the desire to know more about the idea pushes you into futher research of the subject.  The idea can be something you don't understand to be acceptable or unacceptable. The drive to understand leads to passion and that passion drives you to develope a great idea.

 

 

COMMENTARY

This essay is fundamentally flawed; it does not present an organized, coherent response to the topic.  Sentences and fragments are strung together with little, if any, underlying⁵¹ logic.  The writer's position seems to be that the more passionate we are about an idea, the more we will pursue it.  But this idea is not really developed, even in a perfunctory way.

 

The errors are so pervasive⁵² and fundamental that they seriously interfere with meaning.  This response requires considerable revisions to receive a score higher than 1.

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