I don't care how nice you ask me
there is one thing I won't eat.
I don't care how much you add to it
to try to make it sweet.
Not a giant pot of honey.
Not a dozen jars of jelly.
Not a sixteen-pack of soda1 pop
will get one in my belly2.
Use a tank of maple3 syrup4
or a truckload full of fudge.
Bring a hundred cans of frosting
but you will not make me budge5.
Try a thousand pounds of chocolate
or a million tons of sugar.
I don't care how much you sweeten it,
I will not eat a booger.