英语笑话 / 儿童笑话

Cry

日期：2014-06-12 Tom, what's the matter with your brother? asked the mother in the kitchen. He's crying. Oh, nothing, Mum, replied Tom. I'm eating my cake. He is crying because I won't give him any. But has he finished his own cake? Yes. said Tom. And he also cried... 阅读全文>>

The kitchen is so dark 厨房里太黑了

日期：2014-05-28 After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not? After a while, her son returned and said, M... 阅读全文>>

He Won 他赢了

日期：2014-05-19 Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？约翰尼：他害病卧... 阅读全文>>

Nest and Hair 鸟窝与头发

日期：2014-05-19 My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom. What kind of bird? my sister asked. I didn't see the bird, ma'am, only the nest, replied the child. Then, can yo... 阅读全文>>

Micro-parents forum 微型家长座谈会

日期：2014-05-19 Son: Dad, are you available on Friday afternoon? Dad: What ah? Son: The school want parents to have a mini-parents forum! Dad: What is micro-parents forum? Son: It's only a class teacher, you and I participate in! 儿子：爸爸，星期五下午您有空吗？爸... 阅读全文>>

妈妈在砸瓶子

日期：2014-05-07 A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup（番茄酱） to come out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year-old daughter to answer the phone. The child said, Mommy can't come to the phone right now. She's hitting th... 阅读全文>>

A letter to God 写给上帝的信

日期：2014-04-25 A little boy needed $50 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $50. When the post office received the letter to God, they decided to send it to the president. The president was so... 阅读全文>>

Saving Money 省钱

日期：2014-04-15 A man told his son to take a letter to the post office, buy a three-cent stamp and mail it. After a while his son returned. The man asked him, Did you mail the letter? His son replied, Certainly, and I have saved the three cents. I saw many people d... 阅读全文>>

Stupid Orders 愚蠢的命令

日期：2014-04-08 When Nasreddin was a boy, he never did what he was told, so his father always told him to do the opposite of what he wanted him to do. One day, when the two were bringing sacks of flour home on their donkeys, they had to cross a shallow river. When... 阅读全文>>

I want a nightmare 真想做个噩梦

日期：2014-01-23 Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, Mom, I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam. Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite. Mother replied. Then I do hope I'... 阅读全文>>

When was Rome built

日期：2013-12-12 Teacher: When was Rome built? Tom: At night. Teacher: Who told you that? Tom: You did. You said Rome wasn't built in a day.... 阅读全文>>

Water your flowers every day

日期：2013-12-12 Flowers need water, said the teacher. Water your flowers every day, or they'll die. One morning Mother saw Marry out in the garden and asked, What are you doing there, Marry? Watering flowers, said Marry. But it is raining now! Oh, it doesn't matter... 阅读全文>>

Don't argue with the children

日期：2013-10-16 A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because, even though it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swa... 阅读全文>>

A Rithmetic Lesson

日期：2013-10-16 A little boy bustled（喧闹，忙乱） into a grocery one day with a memorandum（便笺） in his hand. Hello, Mr. Smith,He said, I want thirteen pounds of coffee at 33 cents. Very good, said the grocer, and he noted down the sale. Anything else, Charlie?... 阅读全文>>

Goes to the cinema

日期：2013-10-14 A boy goes to the cinema. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out. He buys a second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he comes out again and buys a third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes... 阅读全文>>

Johnny is busy now

日期：2013-10-09 It was half-past eight in the morning. The telephone rang and Mary went to answer it. 'Hello, who's that?' she asked. 'It's me--Peter.' Peter was a friend of Mary's eight-year-old brother, Johnny. 'Oh, hello, Peter. What do you want?' said Mary. 'Ca... 阅读全文>>

They are all the same size

日期：2013-09-22 In a country home that seldom had guests, a young son was eager to help his mother after his father appeared with two dinner guests. When the dinner was nearly over, the boy went to the kitchen and proudly carried in the first piece of apple pie, gi... 阅读全文>>