日期：2011-07-21 While taking photos of a bear eating fish in the forest, two journalists found the annoyed beast turned around to chase them. In running, one journalist said to the other:Can't run any more! What should we do? No idea. But one of us will have his ph... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-07-21 Mark Twain once went to borrow a certain book from a neighbour in Tarry town. May I borrow a book from you? he asked politely. Yes, you're more than welcome to it, the neighbour told him. But I must ask you to read it here. You know I make a rule ne... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-07-14 No, growled（咆哮） the quartermaster, you can't have a new pair of shoes. The pair you have aren't worn out. Not worn out, cried the recruit, Why, if I step on a dime I can feel if it's head or tails. 不行，军需官大声说：你不能领一双新鞋子，你穿着... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-07-04 How did you make your fortune? I became the partner of a rich man. He had the money and I had the experience. How did that help? Now he has the experience and I the money. 你是怎么发财的？ 我变成一个富人的合伙人，他有钱，我有经验。 那有什么用？ 现在... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-07-04 One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all his sums right. The teacher was very pleased-and rather surprised. He called Tim to his desk and said to him, You got all your homework right this time, Tim. What... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-07-04 While eating in a restaurant, I reprimanded（谴责，责难） my four-year-old son for speaking with his mouth full . Mump umn Kmpfhm, was all I heard. Drew, I scolded, no one can understand a word you're saying. He says he wants some ketchup（番茄酱）... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-06-28 When Peters learned that he was being fired, he went to see the head of human resources. Since I've been with the firm for so long, he said, I think I deserve at least a letter of recommendation. The human resources director agreed and said he'd hav... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-06-28 The man in the prison asked a new comer why he was sent there. The new comer answered: I am out of luck, I think. A few days ago I was walking in the street when I saw a piece of dirty rope. I thought nobody wanted it and so I picked it up and took... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-06-19 A poor man, presenting himself before the King of Spain, asked his charity, telling him that he was his brother. Thinking desiring to know how he claimed kindred（家族，亲属关系） to him, the poor fellow replied, We are all descended from one common... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-06-19 Having been married a long time, my husband sometimes needs a gentle reminder of a special occasion. On the morning of our 35th anniversary, we were sitting at the breakfast table when I hinted, Honey, do you realize that we've been sitting in these... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-06-19 Did you sell any of your paintings at the art show? No, but I am encouraged, he replied. Somebody stole one. 你的画在美术展上有卖出去吗？ 没有，但我还是受到了鼓励，他回答说，有人偷走了一幅。... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-06-12 A father of five children came home with a toy, summoned his children and asked which one of them should be given the present, Who is the most obedient（顺从的） , never talks back to Mother and does everything he or she is told? He inquired. There... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-06-08 The notorious（声名狼藉的） cheap skate explaining to a friend how to find his apartment. He said. Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open. Push with your foot. Why use my elbow and foot? Well. Gosh, was the reply. Yo... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-05-27 A tourist was visiting New Mexico and was amazed at the dinosaur（恐龙） bones lying about. How old are these bones? the tourist asked an elderly Native American, who served as a guide. Exactly one hundred million and three years old. How can you be... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-05-27 One night a hotel caught fire, and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes. Two men stood outside and looked at the fire. Before I came out, said one, I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-05-27 One day a boy came to his teacher and said: Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast（烘烤） pig. I certainly do, said the teacher, and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me. Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pi... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-05-27 If you refuse to marry me, he swore, I shall die. She refused him. Sixty years later, he died. 如果你不答应嫁给我，他发誓，我就要去死。 她拒绝了他。 六十年后，他死了。... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-04-14 Three famous surgeons were bragging about（吹嘘，炫耀） their skills. A man came to me who had his hand cut off, said one. Today that man is a concert violinist（小提琴家） . That's nothing, said another. A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-03-30 All the kids make fun of me, the boy cried to his mother, They say I have a big head. Don't listen to them, his mother comforted him, You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes. Where's the shopping bag... 阅读全文>>

日期：2011-03-30 I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class, observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles. When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoo... 阅读全文>>