日期:2014-04-25 A big battle was going on during the First World War. Guns were firing, and shells and bullets were flying about everywhere. After an hour of this, one of the soldiers decided that the fighting was getting too dangerous for him, so he left the front... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-25 A farmer and his son, traveling by horse and buggy up a narrow lane, met a motorist going the other way. There was no room to pass for two miles in either direction. The motorist, in hurry, honked his horn. If you don't back up, said the farmer, rol... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-25 One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad? Well, my son, his father replied, look, the... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-25 A man was driving to work when a truck ran a stop sign hit his car broadside, and knocked him cold. Passerbys pulled him from the wreck and revived him. He began a terrific struggle and had to be tranquilized(使安静) by the medics. Later, when he... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-25 One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau is known for his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to one freshman class, he said, Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don't mi... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-25 This is your captain speaking. On behalf of my crew. I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic. If you look out of the windows on... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-25 On the day of our final exam at my Community College in Santa Maria, Calif., we heard that the bookstore had changed its policy and would buy back our business-management textbooks. Before class, several of us dashed over to the store and sold our b... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-15 The landlady said to the hard-up author: When will you pay arrears(拖欠,滞付) of room rent? The author replied: I will pay you as soon as I receive the check that the publisher will send me if he accepts the novel that I am about to start writing... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-15 The speaker found some people leaving the building during the meeting. He was annoyed. Then he had an idea. When someone else started out, the called out to the man: Wait a minute, Ill go with you to see what is on the outside, It must be more inter... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-14 An editor stuck up a notice above his desk. It read, Accuracy! Accuracy! Accuracy! and he always pointed it out to the new reporters. One day a young reporter came to hand in his report of a public meeting. The editor read it through and noticed the... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-14 A political speaker was annoyed by a man in the audience. The man coughed and sneezed and blew his nose almost constantly. Finally the speaker was unable to stand it. He very politely said to the man: You are having so much discomfort. If you go out... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-14 An old man of seventy-six went to a doctor to request a general check up as to the state of his health. The doctor looked him up thoroughly, and then told him: Everything is fine. As the old man paid his fee, the doctor asked him: Have you followed... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-14 A pretentious(自命不凡的) scholar was keen to show off. One day when he was being rowed across a stream, he asked the boatman: Do you understand philosophy? No, sir, said the boatman. Then, said the scholar, one-fourth of your life is gone. After... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-14 A man stopped at a place where a subscription(捐献) was being raised for the purpose of fencing the cemetery(墓地) . A lot of people had made a donation. The man thought it was unnessary to do so. He said, I have two reasons. In the first place,... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-14 A lawyer was examining a suspect to check whether he was mentally ill. Who was our first president? asked the lawyer. The suspect answered, Washington. Right, And who was our second president? said the lawyer. The suspect answered, John Adams. Corre... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-08 Our university newspaper runs a weekly question feature. Recently, the question was: Whose autograph would you most want to have, and why? As expected, most responses mentioned music or sports stars, or politicians. The best response came from a fre... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-08 On my first day of classes at my university I took a front-row seat in my literature course. The professor told us we would be responsible for reading five books, and that he would provide us with a list of authors from which we could choose. Then h... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-08 The phone rang in the obituary(讣告) department of the local newspaper. How much does it cost to have an obituary printed? asked the woman. It's five dollars a word, ma'am, the clerk replied politely. Fine, said the woman after a moment. Got a pen... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-08 Deep In the back woods of Tennessee, a hillbilly's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said, Here.... 阅读全文>> 日期:2014-04-08 Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. Boss, he says, we're doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff. We're short-handed, Smith, the boss re... 阅读全文>> |
|