11-10-28 Landon had made an unsuccessful attempt at the recitation（背诵，朗诵） , and the doctor, somewhat nettled（刺激，惹恼） , said: Landon, you don't seem to be getting on very fast in this subject. You seem to lack ambition. Why, at your age Alexander...

11-10-20 A patient said to his doctor, Doc, please give me something that will stimulate me, excite me, and put me in a, very, very highly stimulated spirit, a fighting, excited spirit. So the doctor said, Don't worry, take this, and after you see the bill,...

11-09-20 Help! Doctor! Please come quickly! My ten-year-old son has just swallowed a pen! Ok , I'll be right there. I'll be there in 10 to 20 minutes. Good,but....what am I supposed to do in the meantime? Just use another pen! 救命！医生！你赶快来！我那个十...

11-09-08 Doctor: I can do nothing for your complaint. It is hereditary. Patient: Then send the bill to my father, please. 医生：对你的抱怨我无能为力。那是遗传...

11-09-08 Doctor: How many ears and eyes does a cat have? Patient: Two of each. Doctor: And how many legs does it have? Patient: Say, Doctor, haven't you ever seen a cat? 医生：一只猫有几个耳朵和眼睛？ 病人：都是两个。 医生：那么它有几条腿呢？ 病人：我说，医...

11-08-30 There was a farmer who fell and broke his hip while he was plowing（耕地） , and his horse immediately galloped（疾驰，飞奔） five miles to the nearest town and returned, carrying a doctor on his back. Thats a pretty smart horse, the farmers friend...

11-08-18 Brown: I'm sorry to see you so unwell. Have you seen the doctor? Jack: Yes. I'm having three baths a day. Brown: What for? Jack: Don't know, doctor's orders. He gave me some medicine and told me to follow the directions on the bottle, which read: On...

11-08-01 An Australian woman says she carried a grapefruit-sized sponge inside her abdomen for 15 years, and is suing the doctor who she says left it there. 一位澳大利亚妇女称，一块葡萄柚大小的海绵已在她腹部内存在了15年时间。目前她正在起诉当时给她做手术的医...

11-07-21 A much worried patient walked into doctor's office asking for help: Doctor, I don't know what to do. I accidentally drank a bottle of gasoline yesterday! Oh, Don't worry! All you have to remember is not to smoke in the next few days! 候诊室里坐着一...

11-06-02 Doctor Huang Xiaoyuan of Hangzhou was a noted authority on skin diseases and infections of all sorts. One day he was sitting in his office when a man came in groaning（呻吟） . What an ugly brute（畜生，残暴的人） , the doctor couldn't help thinking...