日期:2008-05-07 A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy and a priest were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble. In spite of the best efforts of the pilot, the plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-05-07 A farmer asked a friend to recommend an attorney to defend him against a charge of bestiality. I know a great trial lawyer, the fellow said, but he's expensive and doesn't know how to pick a jury. I know another lawyer, he continued, who's not a gre... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-05-07 A farmer's wife was at her lawyer's getting advice about a divorce. He makes excessive sexual demands on me, Mr. Jones. How do you mean? Well, Mr. Jones, says the farmer's wife, this morning I was looking at the chickens, when he crept up behind me... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-05-07 A doctor vacationing on the Riviera met an old lawyer friend and asked him what he was doing there. The lawyer replied, Remember that lousy real estate I bought? Well, it caught fire, so here I am with the fire insurance proceeds. What are you doing... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-05-07 One afternoon, a lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. Why are you eating grass? , he asked one man. We don't have any money for... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-03-28 A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, What do y... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-03-28 A truck driver used to amuse himself by running over lawyers he would see walking down the side of the road. (As he'd had a bad time in divorce court recently, and blamed the lawyers.) Every time he would see a lawyer walking along the road, he woul... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-03-28 A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical-looking parrots on a perch and says: The parrot on the left costs $500. Why does the parrot cost so much? asks the customer. The owner says Well, the parrot knows h... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-03-28 Two attorneys have planned to meet for lunch, but one of them shows up 30 minutes late. The one who's been waiting asks his partner: What kept you? I ran over a Coke bottle and got a flat tire. A Coke bottle in the road? Didn't you see it? No, the k... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-03-28 An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing. A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in a... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, b-lines for the local butcher shop and steals a roast off the counter. The butcher goes to the lawyer's office and asks, if a dog, running unleashed, steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 A small, uncertain, and nervous witness was being cross-examined. The lawyer thundered, Have you ever been married? Yes, sir, said the witness in a low voice. Once. Whom did you marry? Well, a woman. The lawyer said angrily, Of course you married a... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 There was a job opening in the country's most prestigious law firm and it finally comes down to Robert and Paul. Both graduated magna cum laude from law school. Both come from good families. Both are equally attractive and well spoken. It's up to th... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 Drunken Billy was arrested for selling home-stilled whiskey. His lawyer put him on the stand and asked the jurors to look carefully at his client. Now, Ladies and Gentleman of the jury, concluded the lawyer, you've looked carefully at the defendant.... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 Visiting a lawyer for advice, the wife said, I want you to help me obtain a divorce. My husband is getting a little queer to sleep with. What do you mean? asked the attorney. Does he force you to indulge in unusual sex practices? No, he doesn't, rep... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 A lawyer was helping a poor old widow settle her husband's estate. Upon completion of the job, he charged her $100.00. She opened her purse, and took out one of the few remaining contents - a one hundred dollar bill. After he left the attorney disco... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 A crown court judge was out on the town one Friday evening, partaking of some of London's finest drinking establishments. Returning home to his good lady wife in the wee small hours, he realised he was going to be for the high jump when she saw the... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 A little old lady sold pretzels on a street corner for 25 cents each. Every day a young lawyer would leave his office building at lunch time and, as he passed her pretzel stand, he would leave her a quarter, but would never take a pretzel. This went... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 WASHINGTON STATE ATTORNEY SEASON AND BAG LIMITS 1. Any person with a valid Washington State hunting license may harvest attorneys. 2. Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted. The use of currency as bait is prohibited. 3. Killing of... 阅读全文>> 日期:2008-02-28 A prospective juror in a Dallas District Court was surprised by the definition of voluntary manslaughter given the panel: An intentional killing that occurs while the defendant is under the immediate influence of sudden passion arising from an adequ... 阅读全文>> |
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